Lee Ji-ho's POV
I was one grind away from the kind of orgasm that makes your soul leave your body to the heavens before returning.
The ridged dildo was buried so deep it felt like it owned real estate inside me, every bump scraping exactly where I needed it most while I rode it in these frantic, sloppy circles. The remote egg was going full throttle, buzzing in perfect sync with my hips, and I was a sweaty, moaning disaster throat already raw from yelling all the dirty shit I usually keep in my head. "Yeah, fuck me stupid, you hung bastard, choke me with that cock… " Stuff like that. I didn't care that the room was empty. I was right there. Right on the fucking edge. Toes curling, vision blurring, pressure building so fast I thought I might actually pass out from how good it felt.
And then….
White.
Just blinding, endless white.
Like the universe decided "nah, not today" and hit me with a flashbang.
When the light finally faded I was sprawled face-down on sheets that felt way too soft and expensive, silk sticking to my damp skin. My ass was still twitching, clenching around nothing because of fucking course the dildo didn't make the jump with me. The egg, though? That little traitor was still lodged deep, buzzing away. My hips gave one last pathetic twitch against the mattress before my brain caught up.
I pushed up on shaky elbows and blinked hard. Candles flickering. Jade screens. Incense drifting up in lazy curls. Ancient fancy bedroom. Cultivation-novel starter pack.
"Noooo," I whined, and it came out embarrassingly high-pitched. My hips rolled forward again on pure instinct, grinding uselessly into the bed. "I was literally seconds from exploding, you absolute asshole of a cosmos. Seconds!"
Nothing answered except more incense smoke and the persistent buzz-buzz-buzz from inside me.
Then this glowing blue panel appeared right in my face like it had been waiting for me to stop dry-humping silk.
[System: Temporal Displacement Complete.]
[New Objective – Gather 500ml of thick seed .]
[Reward: Qi Core Upgrade + Permanent Sensitivity Boost.]
[Penalty for Failure: Permanent Qi Deviation (ED + chronic pain).]
[Time Limit:...30days may change with time ...]
I stared.
Blinked once. Twice.
And then I started laughing real ugly wheezing laughter that made my stomach hurt and tears leak out the corners of my eyes because it was just so fucking absurd.
"Five hundred milliliters," I said out loud to the empty room, voice cracking from how hard I was cackling. "Directly from my stretched rear. You wrote that. You put those words on a magic screen and expected me not to lose it. What is this, Cum Collection Simulator: Isekai Edition?"
The panel didn't even flicker. Zero sense of humor.
I flopped onto my back, arms flung wide, still laughing even though my dick was throbbing painfully and my hole kept fluttering around the egg like it was trying to negotiate with physics.
"Okay. Okay. So I got blue-balled into another dimension and now my literal job is to become a walking cum repository or my dick retires permanently. That's… honestly? Peak me. That's so on-brand I can't even pretend to be mad."
I slid a hand down, pressed my palm against the faint bulge the egg made low in my belly, and gave it a little push. A pathetic, broken moan slipped out before I could clamp my mouth shut.
"Still works. Nice. At least you didn't take my favorite party trick away, you sadistic glowing bitch."
Another push. The buzz kicked up a notch. My toes curled so hard they cramped.
"Fuck…. okay, chill, I'm trying to have a moment here."
I sat up properly, legs dangling off the side of the ridiculously huge bed. The sheet pooled around my waist. I looked down at myself still the same unfairly pretty body, still leaking like someone left the faucet on, still wired from the almost-orgasm.
"Right. New world checklist. Cultivation crap. Qi. Flying swords. Arrogant young masters who monologue before they fight. And my quest log says I have thirty days to get railed into next week or I end up with magical erectile dysfunction forever. Cool. Very cool. Truly the universe's funniest joke."
I snorted so hard it hurt.
" That's cultural spite at its finest."
The panel flickered like it took offense.
I flipped it off with both hands.
"Listen, you floating blue cock-block. I'm not even angry. I'm impressed. You took my entire degenerate personality, boiled it down to one quest, slapped a timer on it, and called it a day. Chef's kiss. But also go fuck yourself."
I swung my legs a little, feeling the egg shift with every tiny movement. Fresh heat rolled through me and I had to bite my lip so hard I tasted blood.
"Okay. Game plan time. Step one: locate dick. Preferably attached to someone who knows how to use it. Preferably producing enough to hit quota in one go because I'm greedy. Step two: collect like my life depends on it, which it literally does. Step three: upgrade sensitivity so every breeze feels like a tongue. Step four: cackle at the heavens while I break through to whatever bullshit realm comes after Golden Core because I'm getting absolutely destroyed for power-ups."
I stood up. Wobbled immediately. Grabbed one of the carved bedposts before my knees gave out.
"Also step five: don't get murdered by some sect elder who thinks shameless whores are demonic before I even collect my first load."
I took one step toward the sliding door and instantly regretted every life choice.
Every movement made the egg grind right against that spot. My vision whited out for a second.
"Motherfucker," I hissed, clutching the post tighter. "You couldn't drop me here post-nut? Had to be mid-edge? You're a monster."
Deep breath. Another step. Buzz got louder like it was laughing at me.
"I swear if I cum just from walking I'm going to burn this whole cultivation world down."
Three more steps. I made it to the door. Hand on the cool wood. Forehead pressed against it while I tried to remember how breathing worked.
"Okay. Deep breaths. Look hot. Act like you belong."
I slid the door open a crack.
Peeked out.
Empty hallway. Lanterns. More jade. Standard.
I opened it wider.
Stepped out.
The egg picked that exact moment to ramp up.
My hand slapped the wall. I bit down on my own forearm to muffle the yell.
"Fuck fuck fuck why are you the worst… "
Footsteps.
Heavy.
Coming straight toward me.
I froze. Ass clenched so hard around the egg I saw literal stars.