So, it's been around two months since I started Mental Conditioning, and during that period, I have been able to hear my mother's voice.
It seems that I have reincarnated in a Japanese setting, as I hear my mother speak in it, which I find ironic, as I really have gotten the true isekai experience, having landed in another world or fantasy Japan, which I find quite cliché.
Still, it's nice to hear someone else's voice, as I am pretty sure I have gone just a teeny tiny bit insane during this forced period of isolation.
Now, in order to get an early look at the outside world, I have been trying to create a Ki sense, but I have somewhat hit a roadblock, as I am not able to even perceive my own mother's Ki.
Quite a problem, if you consider the fact that I am residing within her, and yet I am not able to detect a hint of her Ki.
I have tried multiple different approaches, and yet I have found no progress, which is quite puzzling.
Though aside from my roadblock in external sensing, my progress with Prana Bindu, Mental Conditioning, internal Ki manipulation, as well as the Flame and the Void, has been going swimmingly.
My progress with the Flame and the Void has improved by shifting my complete focus from the aspect of the Flame and improving my understanding of its other half, The Void.
Previously, when I first discovered the Flame, I had embedded everything I had into it. But that is not the correct approach, as while that did increase the intensity of the Flame, it also left impurities in it. Irrelevant information has no place in the Flame; there is no reason to infect my conviction with dunce info.
That is where the Void comes in.
Its use is to shed impurities of your being and is a crucial tool to refine yourself, as in order to thrive, you must cut off cancerous limbs.
However, it isn't without risk, as one must identify what needs to be discarded and what must remain. Shedding something vital from your well-being causes irrevocable damage to yourself and ego.
At the same time, in order to refine yourself, you must purge the impurities holding you back.
So, I meditated on the Void, all while letting my past resentments flow into the ether.
I slowly lost my sense of self while meditating to the lull of the vibe.
I felt so sleepy.
I felt so tired.
My consciousness dimmed and fragmented.
I just wanted to sleep for a moment.
My senses started to dim, and I began to drift off.
Right then, I had not realized that the Flame had started quivering and was on the verge of being smothered. The Void was pulling me into an endless slumber.
The tail at my spine twitched.
The Ki present in my tail all of a sudden permeated itself into the Flame and the Void, and the next thing I knew, I heard a booming voice released by a creature I could not ever fathom existing in my prior world.
"RAHHHHHHHHH!"
My slumber instantly shattered, and all of a sudden, I saw a giant beast palm-cradling the Flame.
The creature was colossal.
Not in a majestic sense, but in the way a natural disaster was colossal. Its presence warped everything around it, forcing reality to bend simply to make room. Coarse, pitch-black fur covered its massive frame, wild and unkempt, as though restraint had never touched it.
Its body was built for one purpose alone.
Violence.
Shoulders hunched forward beneath impossible muscle; its spine curved like a beast forever on the edge of motion. Every breath it took felt heavy, labored, as if even existing required constant suppression of overwhelming strength.
Its eyes opened.
Red.
Not divine. Not enlightened. Purely bestial. Burning with instinct so raw it felt ancient. There was no calculation there, no higher thought, only an absolute directive etched into its being:
Survive. Protect. Erase the threat.
Its jaws parted, revealing rows of jagged fangs slick with saliva. Each exhale rolled out like thunder, reverberating through the Void itself. One massive hand was raised before me, fingers thick and clawed, nails cracked and blackened.
The Flame rested in its palm.
Not gently cradled.
Held.
Pinned there by sheer force of will, like something precious yet fragile, something it would rather crush than allow to be extinguished. Ki poured from the beast in violent, feral waves, unrefined and uncontrollable, tearing through the Void and scattering it like mist before a storm.
Its tail lashed once, violently, and the Void recoiled.
Then it threw its head back and roared.
"RAHHHHHHHHH!"
The sound wasn't just heard.
It was felt.
It shattered the pull dragging me toward endless slumber, ripped my consciousness free, and forced awareness back into every fragment of my being. The Flame flared in response, blazing brighter, steadier.
And then something clicked.
I didn't feel fear.
I didn't feel threatened.
I felt… familiarity.
The realization settled with terrifying clarity.
It was the Ozaru.
And it wasn't guarding me.
It was me.
Not an external entity. Not a curse. Not a monster lurking beneath the surface. This wasn't something to be feared or suppressed. This was instinct given form, survival given teeth and claws. My will, stripped of language and restraint, acting where thought had failed.
I was in Dragon Ball.
And unlike the Saiyans who fear losing themselves to the beast, I understood instinctively what this was.
A part of me that could not sleep.
A part of me that could not fade.
A part of me that would rise screaming if I ever came close to disappearing again.
The red eyes met mine.
There was no hostility there.
No madness.
Only recognition.
Acceptance flowed both ways, seamless and unquestioned, like two halves finally acknowledging each other. The beast did not threaten me, because it could not. To harm me would be to harm itself. We were not master and monster.
We were whole.
With a rough, almost dismissive motion, the Ozaru cradled the Flame, and instinctively I knew that it was protecting it and signaling to me that I could sleep, as it had noticed the fact that I had been weakened by my fray with the Void.
It hovered around the creeping darkness, holding the Flame while being on constant lookout for the Void.
I passed out knowing that something inside me would rather tear the universe apart than let me fade quietly.
And I welcomed it.
...
When I next woke up, I was in agonizing pain.
I felt my surroundings crushing me, and at some point, I had to offload the pain I was feeling to the Void.
Thankfully, the Ozaru was still guarding the Flame, so I did not have to worry about drifting off into the Void due to the haze of pain blinding my concentration.
I also felt my body being shifted toward an unknown direction, but the pain made it hard to focus.
Even though I was diverting a good portion of my pain to the Void, my experience was not proficient enough to flawlessly offload it all.
I felt my bones grinding against my skin. I felt my head being squished and constricted.
I felt my body being suffocated by an omnidirectional force.
The pain escalated without warning.
It wasn't sharp. It wasn't sudden.
It was total.
Pressure closed in from every direction, crushing and grinding with merciless intent. My ribs bent inward, pliable yet screaming, organs compressed against one another as if the space I occupied was actively rejecting my existence. The walls around me contracted again, harder this time, and something inside my skull shifted.
My head was being forced through something far too small.
I felt my bones flex grotesquely, cartilage screaming as my skull plates overlapped under impossible force. The sensation wasn't clean pain, it was wrong pain, the kind that told you your body was doing something it was never meant to remember.
I couldn't breathe.
Not yet.
The lack of air burned worse than fire. My chest convulsed on instinct, lungs spasming uselessly as they tried to draw in something that didn't exist. Every failed attempt sent fresh waves of agony spiraling through me, panic clawing at the edges of my consciousness.
Another contraction hit.
I was dragged.
Skin scraped. My spine twisted. One shoulder wrenched forward while the rest of me lagged behind, nerves lighting up in blinding succession. I felt myself being stretched, compressed, folded in ways that defied anatomy. My neck bent sharply, pressure building until white-hot pain exploded behind my eyes.
For a horrifying moment, I genuinely thought something vital had snapped.
I dumped pain into the Void in great, desperate chunks, but it was like trying to bail out a sinking ship with bare hands. The Void swallowed what it could, yet too much remained, raw and unfiltered, tearing through my awareness.
My heartbeat thundered wildly.
The Ozaru stirred again, not manifesting, but present, a massive, coiled pressure at the core of my being. It didn't rage. It didn't roar.
It endured.
Another brutal shove forced my head free.
Cold.
The sensation was alien, shocking, slicing across my skin like knives. The pressure around my skull vanished abruptly, replaced by a burning chill that made every exposed nerve shriek. My body followed in a violent rush, shoulders tearing free, torso sliding, hips twisting—
And then I was out.
The world assaulted me all at once.
Gravity yanked at limbs that had never known their own weight. Air scraped across my skin, frigid and abrasive. My chest seized again, harder than before, lungs spasming in violent refusal—
Then they opened.
Air flooded in like fire.
It burned down my throat, seared my lungs, expanded my chest to the point I thought it would rupture. I screamed as breath tore out of me, the sound raw, involuntary, carrying pain, shock, and pure survival instinct.
And with that first breath—
Life slammed into me.
Ki erupted across my senses in an overwhelming surge, no longer muted or distant, but screamingly vivid. The world wasn't empty. It was crowded. Layers upon layers of living presence crashed into my awareness, anchored by the massive, steady warmth of my mother's Ki surrounding me.
Breath was life.
Life was Ki.
Through the pain, through the chaos, one thought cut through with absolute clarity:
I had survived the most traumatic experience of my life.
And something deep within me growled its approval.