Shiki stepped into the courtyard of the 9th Division headquarters—
And the world blurred before his eyes.
"Miraiiii!"
A high-pitched, teary shout full of manic energy slammed into his ears at the exact moment something struck his gut like a head-on charge from a giant Hollow.
"Ugh!"
The grunt was ripped from his lungs before he even saw what hit him. His feet left the ground. His body flew backward.
BANG!
His back collided with the stone wall of the courtyard—hard. Pain ricocheted through his insides. Dust rained down around him.
"I heard there were Menos in the Human World this time! I've never even seen one! Are you okay?! Were you hurt?! Let me see!"
Vice-Captain Kuna Mashiro's tiny, frantic face suddenly filled his entire vision.
She grabbed both sides of his shihakushō collar and shook. Violently. So hard his head wobbled back and forth, eyes starting to sparkle—literally.
"V-Vice Captain…" Shiki managed to croak through his crushed windpipe. "I… can't… breathe…"
"Huh?!"
Her eyes filled with tears immediately—and her shaking got even worse.
"Mirai, don't die!! Quick, say something! Where does it hurt? I'll kiss it better!"
Shiki felt like a sapling caught in a hurricane—bent, whipped, and helpless under the onslaught of her insane strength.
The pressure on his neck intensified. Darkness crept in at the edges of his vision. His thoughts started floating like sea foam on a retreating tide—
"You idiot! Are you trying to kill him?!"
THUD! A smack and a pained yelp followed as the crushing force around his neck abruptly vanished.
Captain Muguruma Kensei had arrived—just in time to land a solid punch on Mashiro's head.
The tiny Vice-Captain immediately let go, clutching her scalp, eyes welling up again as she sank to a crouch in pure indignation.
"Ughhh… I was just worried about Mirai… Kensei, you big meanie! Stupid jerk!"
"You—" Kensei stared at her, his temple throbbing.
With a heavy sigh, he quickly turned and caught Shiki as he slid limply down the wall.
"Hey. Shiki. Still alive? You're not dead, right?" Kensei slapped his cheek a few times.
"Cough—cough cough cough—" Shiki gasped and hacked violently, clutching at his throat. It felt like someone had poured acid down it.
"C-Captain… if you'd been even a second later, the 9th Division would've needed to start planning a funeral service… and put out a job listing for 5th Seat."
"You're fine." Kensei checked his face. A little bruised, out of breath, but stable Reiatsu. Nothing serious.
"From what I've heard, the Human World mission got nasty. Menos showing up? That's no joke."
He gave Shiki a firm pat on the back.
"You did well. Took down a bunch of Hollows, covered your comrades, acted fast. Good judgment. Nicely done."
Shiki offered a calm nod, his voice quiet but steady.
"Just doing my duty, sir. You're too kind."
Kensei grinned, genuinely pleased.
"You've earned it. You've worked hard—so I'm giving you three days off. Get some rest."
Vacation.
Those two syllables lit up Shiki's dull eyes like fireworks.
He immediately placed a hand over his chest, furrowed his brow, and let just the right amount of weakness flicker across his face.
"Captain… now that you mention it, I do feel a dull ache right here."
He tapped his chest with dramatic gravity.
"Maybe residual damage from the Reiatsu shock earlier… or some internal bruising from retreating too quickly. Wouldn't want that to fester and cause complications during future missions, right?"
He looked at Kensei, sincere and vulnerable.
"So… perhaps we could slightly extend that leave? Say, ten days? Just to be safe."
Kensei's smile vanished. Instantly.
He stared at Shiki, deadpan.
Shiki's heart skipped—but his face didn't twitch. He switched tactics on the fly.
"Okay, okay, ten's too much. Seven! I swear I'll rest properly. No going out!" He raised seven fingers.
Kensei stepped back half a step. Crossed his arms. The look in his eyes darkened.
Shiki gritted his teeth, as if sacrificing a part of his soul.
"Five days! Captain, just five! That's my absolute limit! Any less and I will relapse!"
"Cut the crap."
Kensei finally spoke.
"Three days. And on the morning of the fourth—you're coming with me."
"...Huh? Where?"
Shiki blinked. Why is there an extra mission?
"Kuchiki Clan."
Kensei tossed the three words out like boulders.
Shiki slowly straightened, dropping the fake weakness in an instant.
"So you received an invitation too?"
"So you knew about it," Kensei shot him a sharp glance, as if confirming a theory.
"Good. Then you know why I'm dragging you along. You also know I hate dealing with noble formalities."
He clapped a heavy hand on Shiki's shoulder—hard enough to make him wince.
"So when it's time for polite chatter and social crap with all those blue-bloods, I'm dumping it on you."
"'Soul Society's Noble Gentleman.' Perfect job for you."
"Wait, wait, Captain, hold on!"
Shiki immediately tried to resist.
"You know what I'm like! That 'noble' stuff—it's all just part of the brand image! Marketing! For selling novels! It's a performance!"
His words spilled out in a rapid-fire plea.
"Protocols? Etiquette? The most noble person I've met is our 3rd Seat, Yamaoka! And he's barely even noble—he's a fringe noble at best!"
"I don't know any real etiquette! I'll just embarrass us! Captain, please reconsider—"
"A 'fringe' noble, huh? Pardon me for existing."
A cold voice cut in.
Around the corner, Yamaoka Tetsu stood at his doorway, holding a tower of documents so high it nearly obscured his view. His face was dark as thunderclouds.
He glared at Shiki, then slammed the door shut so hard the dust shook loose from the frame.
"..."
Kensei, of course, knew exactly what kind of person Shiki was.
Decades of working together. Countless lessons—most paid for in blood, sweat, and very creative excuses.
He'd heard it all.
"Captain, I stubbed my toe. I need time to recover."
"Captain, I think my Reishi pathways are tangled. I need a week to 're-thread' them."
Some of those performances had been Oscar-worthy. Real tears. Flawless delivery.
"This is final," Kensei said, voice leaving no room for argument.
He'd learned the hard way—never let Shiki speak too long.
Give him an opening, and he'd turn water into wine, death into taxes, and a three-day break into three months off.
And with that, Kensei turned on his heel, grabbed the sulking Mashiro by the collar, and strode toward the exit.
"Byeeee Mirai~! Don't forget to rest up properly~!" Mashiro called out, happily waving despite being held like a kitten.
"Captain! Wait! Reconsider! Captain!"
Shiki's plea echoed through the courtyard.
But it was too late. He was alone.
And the wind was blowing.
"...Damn it."
He let out a long, bitter sigh.
…