Underground, Land of Grass.
"Madara-sama! Madara-sama! I'm back, y'know!"
"Did Madara-sama eat properly today?"
"Shut up, idiot!"
Uchiha Madara, roused by Tobi, cursed loudly.
"Ara-ya, Madara-sama's awake."
"Does Madara-sama need to pee? A poo is fine too just say the word and I'll help..."
"Shut it, fool!"
"My, my, Madara-sama is as lively as ever."
"Madara-sama, look what great thing I brought this time!"
"Ta-da!!!"
Before Madara could speak, Tobi had already pulled the thing out.
"Here it is Big Watermelon!"
"It's the newest fruit cultivar, super sweet; it hasn't even hit the markets in Sunagakure. I specially plucked it from the lab."
"Idiot, I told you this old man no longer needs food!"
"Eh, really?"
Tobi glanced at the countless skewers at Madara's feet and the White Zetsu beside him sweeping melon-seed shells.
"Ahem those things were about to spoil. Don't you know caves don't ventilate? If they rot, you expect me to live among festering garbage?"
Caught red-handed, Madara remained unflustered, spouting righteous words with a calm face.
Truly the "Asura of the Shinobi World" who'd braved seas of blades and flame.
"Eh~, so Madara-sama likes food that's almost spoiled. I'll set the watermelon aside."
He turned to leave.
"Come back!"
"Does Madara-sama have orders?"
"Leave the watermelon fruit rots fast once picked."
"Eh~, is that so? As expected of Madara-sama, you know everything."
Crack (the sound of a melon being split).
"Madara-sama, how is it? Tasty?"
"Not bad!"
Madara answered absently while wolfing it down.
"Great! I knew Madara-sama would like it."
"I cultivated this watermelon myself!"
"For this melon I traipsed half the Shinobi World, gathered countless poos, and finally blended the perfect fertilizer!"
"..."
"Eh! Madara-sama, why'd you stop eating?"
"Shin!"
"What're you saying, Madara-sama?"
"Ra!"
"Is it thanks to my efforts?"
"Ten!"
"Waaah~, Madara-sama, you finally approve of me!"
"Sei!"
"Ah~, Madara-sama, I'll come see you again! Tell me if you crave anything~~~~~"
"Fool! All because of that idiot Hashirama!"
"Where's Black Zetsu?"
"Reporting to Madara-sama: Black Zetsu is still in the Land of Grass screening candidates for you."
"Mm. How's the eye?"
"The eye's doing well currently enrolled in Sunagakure's Academy, grades are excellent!"
"Keep watch. Monitor the Five Great Nations; wait till the eye matures."
"Yes, Madara-sama!"
"Withdraw."
"Sir!"
Soon only Uchiha Madara remained in the cave, with munch-munch sounds continuing.
"Next time tell that fool to wash it before bringing it!"
With that, he sank back into slumber...
"You're just letting him go?"
"Relax, Sensei he's a filial kid, and I even gave him a raise."
As if recalling something, Shamon didn't contradict Sayan's words.
"Fine truly a dutiful, simple child!"
"..."
"Alright, Sensei. I used natural energy to nourish your body another decade of life, easy."
"Thank you, Sayan!"
Feeling the vitality now coursing within, Shamon beamed at Sayan.
"Never imagined natural energy could be used like this astonishing."
"Of course. The Sages of the Three Great Sage Regions lived millennia precisely by constantly nourishing themselves with natural energy."
"I see. Then why..."
"Sensei wants to ask: the Shodai Hokage also wielded natural energy, so why did he die so young?"
"Exactly. Rumor says the Shodai Hokage possessed Sennin Mōdo, blending chakra with natural energy into mightier Senjutsu Chakra!"
"Different. The Shodai Hokage merely drew natural energy into his body and fused it with his chakra he didn't absorb it into himself, so his body never received its nourishment."
"Sō ka! Then how come you can, Sayan?"
"People's constitutions differ, that's all!"
Shamon: "Heh-heh! Indeed!"
"So how long can you live now?"
"About a thousand years."
"..."
"Eh, Sensei, where are you going?"
Watching his teacher stride outside as if resolved, Sayan called after him.
"On vacation!"
"Weren't you just doing experiments?"
Hearing Sayan's question, Shamon paused and asked,
"Sayan, how strong do you think you are now?"
"Hmmmmm... so-so. At most five people can beat me."
Sayan answered after careful thought.
Should be fewer than five.
Peak-condition Madara counts as one.
Isshiki lurking in the shadows counts as one.
That old man playing dead in the Pure Land counts as one.
The brother of the old man on the moon also counts as one.
One unfilial son counts as half.
Yep, four and a half no more than five.
Perfect.
"Then it's settled. With you around, Sunagakure is guaranteed safe for at least a millennium. I've toiled for the village most of my life can't I enjoy myself?"
Sayan: "..."
In the end, Shamon simply walked away, resolute, never once looking back!
That afternoon, many saw Nidaime Kazekage Shamon stroll out of Sunagakure's gates in shorts and a tee, and climb into his own car.
Whenever anyone asked, he'd say,
"Going to see the sea!"
Everyone grieved, assuming the Nidaime's time was near and he wished to see the ocean one last time.
After all,
Everyone had seen the Nidaime grow younger.
What did that signify?
A flash of sunset before the end!
The Nidaime's days were numbered!
All offered their sincerest blessings to the old man who'd devoted his life to Sunagakure!
Of course,
that was the uninformed.
The informed were already bawling in the Kazekage's office.
"Kazekage-sama! This old man... this old man has busted his guts for Suna half his life! My grandson was just born! Aaaahhh!!! Kazekage-sama! I too want to watch the sea with the Nidaime-sama, but I can't walk anymore I'm... I'm crippled!!!"
Elder Yuan Yi, leaning on his cane, locked Sayan in an embrace, sniveling and wailing.
[Elder Yuan Yi was the one who publicly opposed Sayan at the council.]
"Me too, Kazekage-sama! I stayed single for Konohagakure's sake now I'm completely spent! Poor me, racked my brains for Suna all my life, yet not a single descendant to keep vigil for me how tragic! Still grinding over documents ten-plus hours a day at my age how tragic!!"
Ebizō howled, sprawled at his feet.
Of course,
they weren't alone.
Five elders now clung to Sayan; those who couldn't find space simply wailed about the office.
"All right, all right Elder Ebizō, tally each elder's contributions; come to me based on merit."
"Heh-heh, understood, Kazekage-sama hehehe!"
Hearing Sayan relent, Ebizō sprang up, chirped, and hurried off.
The other elders, hearing the verdict, followed Ebizō out.
"Oh and keep it secret! Wear disguise when you leave it's not time yet!"
"Got it! We understand!"
Relieved it wasn't a reversal, the elders all nodded eagerly.