I had exactly three seconds of peace.
Three.
I was sitting on the bed, staring at nothing, mentally preparing myself for a vampire-filled teenage drama apocalypse, when—
[Newbie Package detected.]
I flinched.
"Oh no."
I pointed at the floating text like it had just insulted my mother.
"No. Absolutely not. We are not doing a 'newbie package.' I've seen what those contain. It's either wildly overpowered or emotionally scarring. Sometimes both."
[Newbie Package is mandatory.]
"That sentence alone is a red flag."
Before I could protest further, the air in front of me split.
Not dramatically. Not explosively.
Just… unzipped.
A neat, glowing tear opened in reality, and out of it—
Paper.
So much paper.
Documents spilled out like reality itself was doing taxes. They floated, shuffled, stacked themselves neatly midair, then gently dropped onto the bed in front of me.
I stared.
"…You gave me paperwork."
[Legal documentation is required for world integration.]
"I crossed universes," I said slowly. "I defied death. I broke causality. And this—" I gestured at the stack "—is where bureaucracy draws the line?"
The papers rustled, offended.
I picked up the first document.
LEGAL IDENTITY CONFIRMATION
Name: Adam
Status: Orphan
Guardians: Deceased (Tragic, Unavoidable, Very Sad)
"…Wow," I muttered. "They really committed to the orphan trope."
I flipped to the next page.
Net Worth: $87,000,000 USD
I blinked.
Once.
Twice.
"…I'm sorry, what?"
I looked at you.
"Did the system just make me a millionaire to compensate for emotional damage?"
[Assets were allocated to ensure narrative stability and personal autonomy.]
"That's system-speak for 'we didn't want you worrying about rent,' isn't it."
I shuffled through more papers.
Property ownership.
Trust funds.
Investments.
Shell companies that definitely didn't sound suspicious at all.
Then—
Primary Residence: Private Mansion
Location: Near Forks, Washington
I froze.
Slowly, very slowly, I lowered the paper.
"…A mansion."
[Confirmed.]
"Near Forks."
[Confirmed.]
I pinched the bridge of my nose.
"Of course it's near Forks. Why wouldn't it be. Why wouldn't the system give me a gothic mansion next to the vampire hotspot."
I imagined it.
Big house. Tall trees. Fog. Probably bats. Definitely creaky floors.
"…If there's a hidden dungeon basement, I'm suing."
More papers.
Educational Transfer Documents
Destination: Forks High School
Transfer Date: Immediate
I stiffened.
"…School?"
I scanned further.
Enrollment synchronized with Isabella Swan.
I dropped the papers.
"Nope."
I looked up at the system.
"No. No no no. We talked about this. I did not consent to being a background character in teenage vampire romance."
[Proximity ensures maximum observational efficiency.]
"That sounds like stalking."
[It is efficient.]
I groaned and fell back onto the bed.
"So let me get this straight," I said to you. "I'm rich, homeless by narrative standards, own a mansion, and I'm going to high school again."
I stared at the ceiling.
"I died for this."
The papers finished sorting themselves, sliding neatly into a leather-bound folder that definitely cost more than my old life.
I was about to complain more when—
[Bonus Item detected.]
I froze.
"…You already gave me money and property. What else could you possibly—"
The room darkened.
Not like lights turning off.
Like shadows woke up.
They stretched. Curled. Gathered at my feet like living things.
My breath caught.
The system text changed color.
Darker.
Heavier.
[Authority Detected: Monarch of Shadows.]
I stopped breathing.
Slowly, very slowly, I whispered:
"…Solo Leveling?"
No response.
"You're joking."
The shadows moved.
They responded.
They recognized something.
Something in me.
"No," I said flatly. "Nope. That's not fair. That's crossing genres."
[Item classification: Authority Fragment.]
[Status: Compatible.]
I scrambled off the bed.
"Compatible with WHAT?"
The shadows surged upward, wrapping around my legs, my arms, my chest—cold but not freezing, heavy but not crushing.
I panicked.
"System," I snapped, "you did not mention eldritch shadow god powers in the newbie package!"
[Disclosure: Monarch of Shadows authority requires fusion.]
"…Fusion."
Yes, you heard that tone.
"That word has never once led to a pleasant experience."
The shadows rose higher, brushing my neck, my jaw, my face.
They felt… alive.
Not hostile.
Curious.
Hungry.
I backed up until my shoulders hit the wall.
"Okay," I said quickly, "new plan. We return this. Full refund. I'll take a coupon instead."
[Fusion is irreversible.]
"I hate this universe."
The shadows paused.
The system text flickered again.
[Warning: Fusion process will cause extreme pain.]
I swallowed.
"How extreme?"
A pause.
[Classification: 'Like a bitch.']
"…That is not a medical unit."
The shadows suddenly pulled.
I screamed.
Pain exploded through my body like every nerve decided to light itself on fire out of spite.
It wasn't sharp.
It was deep.
Like something ancient was forcing itself into every corner of my existence, rewriting me from the inside out.
I collapsed to my knees.
"Oh—oh this is bad—this is really bad—"
My vision blurred.
Shadows poured into me through my skin, my mouth, my eyes—
I felt memories that weren't mine.
Battlefields drowned in darkness.
Armies kneeling.
A throne made of shadow and silence.
I screamed again, throat raw, voice breaking.
"I DIDN'T ASK FOR THIS!"
[Authority synchronization: 12%… 27%…]
It felt like my bones were being crushed and reforged at the same time.
My heartbeat thundered.
The room shook.
Shadows lashed wildly, carving cracks into the walls, the floor, the air itself.
I clawed at the ground, nails scraping wood, trying to stay conscious.
"Make it stop," I begged. "Please—"
[Fusion cannot be halted.]
The pain peaked.
For one horrible, endless moment, I thought I might actually die again.
Then—
Darkness.
Not the void from before.
This was heavier. Thicker.
Like being swallowed by a living night.
My body finally gave up.
As I fell forward, the last thing I heard was the system's calm, uncaring voice:
[Fusion ongoing. Subject unconscious.]
And the shadows…
They smiled.
[Chapter Three Complete.]
Silence swallowed everything.