The auditorium doors slammed open with a bang that echoed through the halls.
Kaizen surged forward with the massive tide of panicked bodies. He wasn't breathing anymore. He was just vibrating with pure, distilled adrenaline pumping through every vein in his body.
"SIT DOWN!"
A voice amplified by wind magic absolutely boomed from the stage, shaking the walls. It wasn't the Principal speaking. It was the Vice-Principal, a man who looked like he ate gravel for breakfast every morning and washed it down with a tall glass of pure, concentrated hatred.
"ANYONE STILL STANDING IN TEN SECONDS GETS EXPELLED!"
'Ten seconds?! Are you kidding me?!'
Panic detonated in the crowd like a bomb going off.
This wasn't some normal school assembly. This was musical chairs with a death penalty attached. Students scrambled over each other, diving over rows of seats, shoving past anyone in their way, fighting for real estate like their actual lives depended on it.
Because in this insane academy, they really did.
Kaizen didn't fight the crowd. Fighting drew attention. Fighting made you memorable. Instead, he weaved through the chaos like water flowing around rocks.
'Excuse me, pardon me, just a generic background character passing through. Don't mind me. I'm basically texture pop-in.'
He scanned the sea of panicked heads desperately. Full. Full. Full. Every single seat was already occupied by some desperate student clinging to the armrests like their life raft in a storm.
'Oh god. Oh god oh god oh god. I'm going to get expelled. I'm going to starve on the streets. I'm going to have to eat rats just to survive.'
Seven seconds left.
Then he saw it.
A gap in the crowd. A single, pristine empty seat sitting right in the middle of the third row. It looked like a beacon of pure hope shining in a dark ocean. A divine miracle sent from heaven itself.
'That's mine!'
He dove for it without thinking. He literally slid into that seat, his butt hitting the cushion in the exact same moment that the Vice-Principal roared, "TIME'S UP!"
WHOOSH.
Silence crashed over the entire hall in an instant. You could hear a pin drop from fifty feet away. You could hear someone's heavy breathing three rows back.
Kaizen slumped forward in his seat, both hands clutching his knees. His heart was doing frantic jumping jacks against his ribcage, desperately trying to escape his chest cavity.
'I made it. Holy crap, I actually made it. I'm safe. I'm invisible.'
He let out a long, shaky sigh of pure relief. He wiped the cold sweat that had gathered on his forehead. He was alive. He was seated. He was just going to keep his head down, stare at his shoes for the entire ceremony, and blend into the background like a good little NPC should--
He looked to his left.
Silver hair that shimmered like actual moonlight. Pointed ears that twitched slightly at some distant sound. A side profile so perfect it looked like someone had carved it from pure marble while completely drunk on love.
Rina Valentine.
The Elf Princess. The future S-rank powerhouse. The girl who hated humans almost as much as she hated poorly brewed tea.
She was sitting less than six inches away from him.
'...Oh no. Oh no no no.'
Kaizen's heart just stopped functioning. It didn't skip a beat or flutter. It straight up handed in its two-week notice and walked out of his chest.
She wasn't looking at the stage where the Vice-Principal was speaking. She was looking directly at him. Those violet eyes swept over his completely generic face, his messy uncombed hair, his cheap polyester uniform that probably cost three copper coins.
She frowned slightly. It wasn't anger or disgust on her face. Just total, complete, dismissive disinterest.
'Mob Character,' her expression seemed to say clearly. 'Complete waste of polygons.'
"Ughhh."
She made a small sound of contempt in the back of her throat, flipped her shimmering silver hair over one shoulder, and turned back toward the stage like he'd already ceased to exist.
Kaizen felt his soul crack straight down the middle.
'Too close. I'm way too close to the main plot. Why was this seat even empty in the first place?'
'Oh right, because nobody in their right mind is crazy enough to sit next to the Ice Princess!'
'It's a trap! This whole thing was a trap!'
He'd walked right into her aggro range like a complete idiot.
He swallowed hard, his throat completely dry.
'Okay. Okay, don't panic. Just... create some distance. Fade back into the background where you belong.'
He scooted to the right as subtly as possible. He shifted his entire weight to the opposite side, pressing himself firmly against the right armrest, trying desperately to put as much physical space between himself and the terrifying elf girl as humanly possible.
She's a main character and anyone with even only one single brain cell knows to steer clear away from them as far as possible.
He exhaled slowly, squeezing his eyes shut tight.
'Okay. I'm safe now. Everything's fine. Just breathe and...'
"Hey dude, you're kind of in my space here."
The voice came from his right side. It sounded pleasant and firm and absolutely terrifyingly familiar.
Kaizen's entire body turned to ice.
He turned his head to the right as slowly as possible, moving like a rusted door hinge that hadn't been oiled in years.
Red hair that caught the light perfectly. A charismatic grin that could sell ice to penguins. An aura that practically screamed 'I am the center of the entire universe and everyone knows it.'
Leo Crimson.
"..."
The Hero. The Main Character. The Protagonist with a capital P. The guy who attracted meteors, demon lords, assassination attempts, and romantic interests just by rolling out of bed in the morning.
Kaizen felt every drop of blood drain from his face so fast he actually got dizzy.
'I'm sandwiched. I'm literally the meat in a Protagonist sandwich. This is how I die.'
He wanted to scream at the top of his lungs. He wanted some alien spaceship to beam him up right this second. He would gladly accept probing. He would accept vivisection. Literally anything would be better than sitting in this exact position.
"I... I... uh..."
Kaizen stammered like his brain had completely stopped working.
Leo blinked once, then his expression softened into something warmer. That trademark, absolutely blinding hero smile appeared on his face. The kind of smile that launched a thousand fanfictions and twice as many shipping wars.
"Hey, it's totally okay," Leo said with an easy chuckle. "We're all packed in pretty tight, right? First day chaos and all that."
'He's nice. Oh god, he's actually nice to random people.'
'That's so much worse! If he starts liking me, I'll become the Comic Relief Best Friend!'
'The Comic Relief Best Friend always dies in Season 3 to give the Hero character development and emotional depth!'
Kaizen managed to force out a weak, absolutely terrified twitch of his lips. It might have been trying to be a smile. It might have been a stroke. Even he wasn't sure anymore.
'Escape. I need to escape right now. I need to clip through the floor. I need to glitch out of reality.'
He looked around frantically, his eyes darting everywhere. The Vice-Principal was still droning on and on about "honor" and "sacrifice" and "the proud traditions of this academy." Everyone was seated and paying attention. If he tried to move now, literally everyone would see him.
But staying here was basically accepting death.
He shifted in his seat again, half-standing while keeping his body low, trying desperately to see if he could vault over the seat directly in front of him without anyone noticing the movement.
"Oi! Stupid human!"
A gruff, seriously annoyed voice grumbled from directly behind his left ear.
"Oi, will ya sit yer backside down already? I'm tryin' to watch the damn ceremony."
Kaizen went completely stiff.
He looked back over his shoulder with growing dread.
A stocky boy with a thick brown beard (despite clearly being only fifteen years old) and arms like literal tree trunks was glaring daggers at him.
Gad Buster. The Dwarf Prodigy. The guy who could break rocks with his bare hands.
More importantly, another main character!
CRACK.
That was the sound of Kaizen's last shred of hope shattering into approximately one million pieces.
Left side: The Elf Princess who hated humans. Right side: The Hero who attracted death flags. Behind: The Dwarf who could crush his skull like a grape.
He was sitting in the exact middle of the Hero Party formation. He was occupying the precise spot where the Healer or the Strategist or the Mentor Figure was supposed to sit during important scenes.
He had accidentally stolen a Main Character's designated seat.
'This can't be happening. This isn't real.'
Kaizen didn't even try to stand up anymore. His body wouldn't listen to him anyway. He just clutched at his chest, feeling a phantom pain stabbing through his heart, and slowly sank back down into the cursed chair. He slid down until his knees bumped against the seat directly in front of him, trying desperately to become two-dimensional.
'It's over. My quiet life plan is completely over before noon on the very first day. I lasted maybe three hours.'
He stared blankly up at the ornate ceiling, half-wondering if that massive crystal chandelier would just fall on his head right now. Honestly, it would be a mercy at this point.
A hand suddenly touched his shoulder.
"Hey, dude."
Leo whispered, leaning slightly closer. His voice was full of genuine, absolutely nauseatingly heroic concern.
"You doing alright? You look really pale. Like, seriously pale. Are you sick or something?"
Kaizen wanted to cry.
'I'm not sick. I'm cursed. There's a difference.'