Vegeta awoke disoriented, petrichor all around him, and his head aching like Frieza had gotten ahold of him after a botched mission. He blinked in the dim light slanting in as though he were subterranean. Which he was. He shifted to see that he was in freshly dug burrow at the base of a large tree. He shoved out of it. A persimmon tree, apparently, though he annihilated the fruit in his drunkenness: the tops of hundreds were scattered around the entrance to his dank cave.
He shook his very hungover head and groped for the night before. It wasn't the first time Vegeta awoke hungover in a shelter of his own devising outdoors. Fucking Panchy. A flash of her weaving off to her bedroom returned to him. Vegeta, now that he wasn't always weeping about Raditz when drunk, thanks to the woman, often became more…Saiyan…when drunk. Which was essentially becoming a feral human but with strength, cunning, and an ability to survive almost anything. Drunk Vegeta liked fucking the woman until they passed out, or if that wasn't an option because he drank too late with the woman's mother, he liked sleeping outdoors. Sometimes this simply meant he made himself a little nest in Panchy's flowers. But last night, likely due to the rain, he had apparently felt compelled to excavate.
He made his way to the quarters he shared with the woman. He prayed to any and all gods that Trunks and Goten were still asleep. The woman was in the shower and she screamed when Vegeta came into the bathroom. "What!? Gods, woman, my skull is already being slowly dissolved in whiskey-scented acid. Why are you screeching like I'm murdering you when I merely intended to join you in the shower?!"
"Vegeta! Sweet gods, you're like a mud-monster. And your face looks sticky. What the hell did you and my mom do last night?"
Vegeta glanced in the mirror and startled. He must have mostly mashed his face in the persimmons. He might have been at the raspberry canes too and had rather a lot of seeds in his hair. "Fuck. I need to drink less. We merely had a book club—"
Vegeta's phone buzzed, interrupting his train of thought. Panchy and her stalwart liver were up and taking care of Goten and Trunks. The text was a picture of them laughing at the results of his drunken foraging and den-digging. Gods he loved that woman and her implacable liver.
"Book club, my ass, you two are ridiculous when you get drinking. Did she try to bury you? In fruit?"
"In a way. Gods your mother can hold her ethanol better than Nappa. Her liver is a thing of legend. I…well…you know how I get sometimes when I'm really soused."
"Did you sleep in a hole again?"
"It seems so. And I ate all the persimmons off the tree I burrowed under."
"I wish you'd just come drunk fuck me."
"I think I was beyond being able to perform. Even my prince of Saiyan pricks has limits. Oh shit…I let her have my phone…"
"She didn't send me any lewd messages from you like the last time. It's just weird that you talk to my mom about sex, Vegeta. Like, really, really weird. If I wasn't so happy that you have a friend, I would totally—"
"I have friends! That's what she said too! I have Scratch! I have Piccolo! I have you!" Vegeta snarled, his head pulsing with regret and alcohol.
"Okay, first of all, cats don't count. Second, Piccolo is essentially a giant green cat, third, it is so sweet and cute that you think of me as your friend."
Vegeta thought he was perhaps still a little drunk as tears sprang into his eyes. "Are…are…are you not my friend?" Gods he was getting as soft as fucking Kakarot. Next he'd be granting mercy to his foes.
"Oh, Vegeta, of course I'm your friend. I just think it's adorable that you think of me as yours."
"Is adorable good? And Piccolo's not a cat! Which…incidentally…I…Well…Your mother…Together. Yes. Together, she helped me to make…plans…with Piccolo."
"Aw, are you guys going to go, I dunno, fishing or something close enough to being poorly tempered house-cats that it doesn't alter your identities—"
"I suppose we could go fishing if you like to fish, but I can't imagine humans are fast enough to catch fish. The ones I've caught in the past were quite swift. There are some in the ocean that have rather a lot of teeth! I don't think you'd come out of a scrap with one of those fish—"
"No, no, no, I'm not going fishing. And I meant with poles and stuff—"
"What the fuck are you gibbering about? Gods, I'm trying to tell you about a date that I set up and you keep making it about house cats and aquatic food and I'm getting irritated. My head is throbbing because your mother has a heavy hand with the whiskey and—"
The woman shut off the shower. Her hands clenched into cute little fists and she put them on her gorgeous hips. Vegeta wanted to stop talking and start fucking. His dick might have been drunk the night before, but it certainly wasn't now and the woman was so fucking sexy, especially in the shower. Especially when she was angry, though he had no idea why she was angry with him this time.
"You're going on a fucking date with Piccolo? How long have you had…feelings…for him?! I thought you said he had a fucking boyfriend!"
Vegeta flared a nostril and flapped a hand at her. "No, godsdamnit woman, are you deliberately misunderstanding me? I feel at times that you try not to understand me! No. I set up a date for you and me together with Piccolo and his boyfriend. What did your mother call it? A double date! Yes! That's it! So we're going camping on Seventeen's island and we'll all have a meal and then I can capture some fish and game for you, because as I mentioned, I'm not confident you'd be able to catch a fish yourself—"
The woman's mouth turned into a little "o" and she held up a hand in a gesture that he now knew meant silence. The first time she did it, he nearly passed out laughing because he thought she was attempting to blast him with chi. He held his tongue and even managed not to chuckle at the memory.
"You set up a double date? With Piccolo, who is your friend, and his boyfriend?"
"Yes?" Vegeta answered, half-questioning because he was wary. He couldn't read her expression.
The woman's smile nearly obliterated his hangover. She wrinkled up her nose and said, "Oh my gods! That is so fucking sweet, Vegeta! I can't believe you're taking me on a date and showing me off to your only friend."
Vegeta tried not to scowl at the phrase "only friend." He didn't quite understand why Scratch didn't count. He found the cat's company considerably more enjoyable than most humans and he was already forced by the extinction of his people to only have friends of other species. Much of what she was unhappy or happy about in this scenario eluded him, so he said with some trepidation, "It seemed an opportunity for you and I to enjoy one another's company while also perhaps acquiring material to gossip about together and with your mother, who is also…my friend."
The woman trailed the very tip of her forefinger down his mud-caked chest. "Take a fucking shower so I can kiss you and maybe do other things."
Things beyond his head began to throb and he smirked. He growled, "Your mother and her warrior liver have our progeny for the morning…perhaps your lab can wait?"
The woman smirked back and said, "Hmm...I think it can, so I better help you scrub your back…"
Vegeta stripped off his clothes and marveled at how messy he'd gotten while blackout drunk. He incinerated them and she screamed. He clutched his head and said, "What now?!"
"You just set shit on fire in our bathroom! It startled me!"
"I didn't set shit on fire, I use the commode to get rid of it."
The woman laughed and gave him a swat on the ass. He preferred that to the arm. She looked at her hand and said, "For fuck's sake, Vegeta, did you build an actual burrow?"
"Apparently. Come here, woman, I wish I'd buried myself in you last night."
They stepped under the water together and once he'd scrubbed his face, he kissed her fiercely, hungrily. He loved her so much. He loved that she loved him, even as he grew weaker and softer and increasingly…human. It scared him, at times, how at home he felt on this ridiculous planet, as long as he had her.
She set to scouring his skin as though he were a project not a person. He helped, but as the last of the mud rinsed away, the woman's hands continued to course over his skin. She stood behind him, nipping and kissing along his shoulders. One hand snaked up under his arm and she pinched and tugged his nipple. The other teased him, ghosting over his cock, cupping his balls with a light touch. Vegeta moaned and tried to press into her hand, but she pulled away, her fingertips digging into his hip as she trailed her tongue down his spine.
Vegeta realized what she was doing, what her goal was, too late to protest effectively. Her mouth opened wide, she flattened her tongue, and dragged it over his tail scar. Vegeta almost collapsed from the intensity of the sensation. He leaned on the wall of the shower and moaned. He meant to say something, anything, because he didn't think this was a thing she would want. But she must. Because Vegeta didn't ask for this. He never had. The fact that the woman desired this for her own purposes made Vegeta's cock pulse.
She continued to play with his nipple, twisting and pulling it until it was so hard that every touch felt amazing. Her tongue cruised the edge of his scar before spiraling into the center, earning more grunts and groans of pleasure from him. He arched back toward her fabulous mouth. She surprised him again, both her hands sliding onto his ass, and spread him wide.
The woman's tongue probed his opening before lapping up and down. Vegeta mewled with pleasure that he hadn't had in so long he'd forgotten it. She slapped his ass with as much force as her frail human body could muster and it made him moan more. She paused and commanded, "Get on your knees, lay your chest on the floor. Open yourself up for me."
Vegeta glanced back at her with wide eyes, startled by her authoritative rimming and the fact that she was bossing him around. He did as she said, though she captured his mouth in a fiery kiss before shoving him forward with her saucy little smirk, her blue eyes ablaze. He gripped his own ass, feeling exposed and more scared than he'd ever been in battle, but hungry. Eager. After their fight about pegging, she'd never so much as fingered him while he fucked her, and she'd never brought it up again, deferring to his wish that she leave it be until he asked for it.
But as time wore on and he felt safe enough with her again that he did want it, he felt equally foolish asking for it. Earth's gender and sexuality nonsense continued to permeate his life and he had moments of wondering if she thought less of him for letting her fuck him before. Would she despise him and lose all respect if he asked her for it? He didn't know because he didn't understand any of the rules pertaining to masculinity on his adopted planet.
Now, as she buried her face in his ass and probed him hungrily with her tongue, she moaned against his pucker. He didn't care about Earth's stupidity. He wanted to be intimate with her in that way. He wanted to be vulnerable with her again. He wanted her to want him that way. He panted, "Bulma…Will…Will you fuck me? Will you peg me?"
Her fingers joined her tongue and she purred, "I would fucking love to peg you, Vegeta, but I'm going to make you come just like this, bad man."
Vegeta cried out as she slipped a finger inside him and drove it mercilessly against his prostate. He spread himself wider, whimpering and pushing back against her hand. She added a second, both slick, though he hadn't even heard her lube them, and pulsed against his sensitive p-spot. "Bulma! Ah! Oh fuck! Bulma!"
"Come for me, Vegeta, I want to watch your ass go crazy," she murmured against the skin of his cheek. She bit him, and it sent him over the edge as she scissored her fingers and added a third.
He shouted, surprised by the intensity of it, and splattered his neck and chin with his own seed. She kissed all over his ass and slowed her fingers. She eased them out of him and gave him a double slap, growling, "So sexy. Come on, bad man, can I fuck you on the bed. I'm getting old and tile is hard on the knees."
Vegeta stood and swept her up in his arms. He kissed her fiercely, lifted her up onto his shoulders, and pressed her against the wall of the shower as he plunged his face into her blue curls, using his tongue to part her lips and finding her sopping and slippery for him. "Fuck, Bulma, the taste of you. Are you wet from eating my ass?"
"Gods, yes, Vegeta, and from fingering you. Oh fuck! Fuck!"
Vegeta sucked on her already engorged clit for a long moment. He eased off to press his tongue deep inside her, tasting more of the slick of her arousal. He murmured, "Gods, woman, I might have to fuck you on our way to the bed. You're soaked."
Before she could answer, he returned his aggressive attentions to her clit, sucking her hard as he slid a hand up her torso. He cupped her soft breast and rolled the nipple between his fingers as he started to pulse his tongue against her clit while he sucked. She screamed his name and came, her pussy twitching and seizing on his chin.
He slid her down his body, wrapped his arm behind her back to protect her, and drove his cock into the wet heat of her core. "Gods, Bulma, you're fucking amazing. I don't know how you love me, but it's a fucking gift. I love you so much," he growled and kissed her mouth.
"I love you, Vegeta. Oh gods, oh fuck, you're going to make me come again if you keep doing that!" she cried as he massaged her clit with his ab muscles in a way he'd been practicing with her. He could time it so his prick hit the inner side of her clit as he added pressure with his lowest abdominals and it always made her come.
It didn't fail him now and as she shivered through her aftershocks, he filled her. He groaned and bucked into her harder, reaching deeper to give them each a last twist of pleasure as their orgasms subsided.
"I still want to fuck you, Vegeta. Please?" she whispered, kissing him and clutching his face.
"Gods yes, woman." He carried her into the bedroom and she got out her peg and he helped her to put it on. What she had just done in the shower combined with the double date to make Vegeta feel as though there had been some sea change in their relationship. He wondered if this could just be enough for him. Did it matter, after all, with no Saiyans left aside from himself and his son, whether she took him as a mate? He lived with her. She fucked him exclusively. Maybe it was enough. He would always strive to be better for her. To be a good partner and father. But maybe he could simply let go of his hope and his desire to be her mate, and just be whatever he was to her. Maybe it didn't need a name at all.
"Get on the bed, bad man, I'm going to fuck your brains out."
Or maybe he already had one. He was her bad man. And he was good at that, at least.
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