{Soft rain whispers secrets to the earth,
Washing yesterday from dusty streets,
Leaving the world gentler than before.} 💚
Sophia's POV
It is time to bid farewells. Khalid interlocks our hands, waving his free one and I mirror him as we stroll towards the entrance. I keep nodding, a smile stubbornly plastered to my face, cloaked with a faux calm.
I have to play my part for now, the perfect bride, the perfect wife, until I can rewrite my own story.
But the weight of what I just did hit me like a bullet, a gush of cold washes over me as I look at our locked hands. My unease isn't born of attraction but of dread. Because this is my life now, a life I agreed to, a life I'd have to navigate with this stranger. A man whose dreams, fears, thoughts and desires I don't know, and who don't know mine.
The bubbles floating around us seem like a cruel irony, a cruel joke that seem to mock me. A fleeting symbol of joy and celebration. their ephemeral beauty, a reminder of the transience of happiness I will never fully experience.
The truth is, I am never an optimist about marriage. To me, it is a prison sentence.
Because why? Why would I willingly submit to a life-long emotional labor with no parole? Why would I sign myself into a never-ending cycle of compromise and sacrifice?
Isn't it a stupid idea to choose to abandon the unfettered expanse of my own soul, to merge with another's in a union that promises heartache.Why would I trade the wild, unbridled freedom of my own heart for the stifling familiarity of married life? Why would I put myself through that wringer?
And love? Don't get me started. Love by my definition, is nothing but a chemical reaction dressed up by Hallmark cards and the wedding industry. It's a fleeting feeling, it's not a reason to shackle yourself to someone forever.
What's the allure of marriage, anyway? Is it the promise of stability and security? Because, honestly, I'd rather take my chances on my own. At least then I'd have only myself to blame when things go wrong.
So yes,I believe in love. And loving myself comes first, being my own person, loving my family and friends. That's enough love for me. I don't need a man to complete me, as they say ' it takes two to tango'. Really?I don't need a piece of paper and ring to validate my existence.
So, marriage to me, is just a social construct, a way to keep people in line. It's not for me.
And yet, here I am.
No one forced me into this whole parade, I walked into this willingly, though I loathed every second. But why did I agree to this wedding ? Why am I walking out of a wedding hall with a stranger that is officially to be addressed as my husband? And what's the answer to my endless questions of why?
As we near the hall's exit, night unfurled across the sky, the sun is a dull orange, sneaking away behind the clouds, grey and heavy with promise of rain. I realize it has been several hours since I last saw the sky. My eyes swept the crowd, smiling faces, congratulatory nods, but I can read the truth beneath. I am not bad at analyzing people's expressions and many of those I am seeing aren't exactly gratifying .
" She's a gold-digger" their eyes say.
" Look at her , desperate for wealth and prestige"
My thoughts are a jumble of frustration and annoyance. My inner demon, Leila, seem to finally be on my side.
She asks the question I am also baffled about. And little did they know I am a business heiress in my own right.
I glance at Khalid, no, my husband, as he leads me down the stairs towards a sleek white limousine. And we bid a last farewell to the several smiley faces arranged on the stairs.
My anxiety slowly streams back into old curiosity. Who is this man I have just pledged my life, myself to?
< He might be a serial killer> Leila hiss out, her words manifesting like a potent poison in my head. What if she is right?
< He might be a gentleman>My inner goddess, Aziza, intercepts, her words working like an antidote to neutralize the poison in my head.
I thought I knocked your ass out? Leila snaps, sparking their usual bickering in my head. Exhausted , I shut them both out.
Silence finally takes over as the door shut and the car is put to ignition. I turn to look at Khalid again. He is moving his fingers across the screen of an iPad with creased brows. And where the hell did that come from? He seem so displeased with whatever he is dealing with and I honestly waited for him to mention a curse word or the like but he doedn't even let out a sigh. No, just a quiet, disciplined seriousness. And I really want to sleep.
< He is a boring big shit> Leila mutters, and annoyingly, I agree.
I mentioned I don't know this man. This whole hassle was instigated by my friend, Adenike. She is the one who is acquainted with Khalid. Adenike is a few years older and despite that, she treats me as a friend and with respect which I reciprocate.
One afternoon, after a business meeting, we decided to have lunch together. She teased me as always " Still single?" my answer was same ," yes." And along our conversation, she mentioned half-joking that her husband's friend needed a bride. It was a statement that would have normally been met with a dismissive laugh, a reaffirmation for my longstanding disdain towards the institution of marriage.
But exactly a week later, I sent her a simple text. 'I'm interested in your husband's friend.'
Adenike nearly fainted, called me insane, she asked me if I had rammed my head into something and she advice that I visit a hospital immediately. She knows how hell-bent I am against marriage. My response made Adenike travel four hours to see me the next day.
And yet, that simple text spiralled into this situation.