Candy leaned on the counter, chin resting on her hands. 🍬
"Tell me about your friends."
Laddu didn't hesitate for even one second.
"I have more than one hundred friends," he said proudly,
"who can beat any ass for me."
Mother cleared her throat loudly. 😤
"…Emotionally," Laddu corrected quickly.
"Emotionally beat."
Candy's eyes sparkled. ✨
"One hundred?"
"Yes," Laddu nodded.
"India is the best place to make friends. You need two seconds."
Maya blinked.
"Two?"
"Yes," Laddu said confidently.
"One second eye contact."
"One second chai." ☕
"Friendship done."
🍬 Friend No. 1 — Barfi
"One is Barfi," Laddu continued.
"He is a medical student."
Candy frowned.
"Doctor?"
"Trying," Laddu nodded.
"His life sucked before. Very dramatic."
Mochi glanced over. 👀
"Now he is okay," Laddu went on,
"but small problem."
"What?" Candy asked.
"He can see ghosts." 👻
Silence. 🧊
"…What."
"And he keeps a gun," Laddu added casually. 🔫
"Safety reasons."
Mother stopped working. ✋
"He is the leader of psychopaths," Laddu continued proudly.
Maya yelled,
"WHY DO YOU SAY THAT LIKE A JOB TITLE."
"And his girlfriend," Laddu added,
"is Miko."
Candy nodded.
"Cute name."
"She is Japanese," Laddu said.
"And her grandpa is the most dangerous gangster." 😌
Candy whispered,
"WHY IS EVERYONE ARMED."
"He lives in Canada," Laddu continued. 🇨🇦
"Peaceful country."
Maya screamed into a towel. 😱
🦅 Barfi's Friends — Walter Blue & Hawk
"Barfi's best friend is Walter Blue," Laddu said.
"He tells a lot of odd stories."
Maya nodded.
"That tracks."
"His nature is like me," Laddu added proudly.
Mochi muttered,
"That explains everything."
"And another friend is Hawk," Laddu continued.
"He is a police officer."
Candy gasped.
"Good guy!"
"Yes," Laddu nodded.
"Very sharp."
"Very intelligent."
"Very tired." 😮💨
"These three," Laddu said,
"go on adventures together."
Mother closed her eyes. 🙏
"Lord, protect the cities."
🍩 Friend No. 2 — Jalabie
"And another is Jalabie," Laddu said.
Candy smiled.
"Sweet name."
"He lives in Korea," Laddu continued.
"South Korea. Of course." 🇰🇷
Candy nodded seriously.
"Of course."
"He can beat anyone," Laddu said.
"He travels with an eight-foot man, full body covered, who only speaks hard truths."
Mother shouted,
"EMOTIONALLY."
"Yes yes," Laddu waved.
"Physically." 💥
"He hates rom-coms," Laddu added.
Candy tilted her head.
"Love?"
"No," Laddu replied.
"Contract." 📄
Maya lost it. 😂
"He throws people out of windows," Laddu continued.
"Emotionally."
"One time he got shot," Laddu added proudly,
"and he only said, 'Ouch.'"
Candy's jaw dropped. 😨
"He talks like a man from the 80s and 90s," Laddu said.
"Full abusive words."
Mochi frowned.
"In English?"
"No," Laddu smiled.
"In Hindi. So no one understands." 😌
🍰 Friend No. 3 — Rasmali
"And Rasmali," Laddu said,
"is always in places where normal people do not go."
Family reaction:
😐 😶 😵 😔
❓ The Important Question
Candy thought hard.
"…How did all these people become friends?"
Laddu smiled.
"Very simple," he said.
"All our names mean Indian sweets."
Candy blinked.
"…That's it?"
"Yes," Laddu nodded seriously.
"Barfi. Jalabie. Me. Rasmali."
He spread his arms.
"Very tasty bond." 🍬🤝
Maya laughed.
"Friendship by dessert."
Mochi shook her head, smiling despite herself. 🙂
Candy clapped. 👏
"I want sweet friends too."
Laddu nodded proudly.
"Eat together."
"Fight together."
"Laugh together."
Mother sighed.
"At least," she said,
"they're loyal."
Laddu smiled.
"Always." 🤍
📞 The Call That Confirmed Everything
Candy's eyes shone.
"Call them. Right now."
Maya groaned.
"Please don't."
Laddu smiled like a man who absolutely would. 😌
"Okay."
He tapped Barfi's name and put the phone on loudspeaker. 📱🔊
Ring.
Ring—
BANG.
The café jumped. 💥
Mother nearly dropped a cup.
Mochi grabbed the table edge.
Candy squealed, half-excited, half-terrified. 😱😆
Barfi's voice came through, calm but breathless.
"Yeah?"
Laddu blinked.
"…What's up?"
Another BANG echoed.
Walter shouted in the background:
"I HIT IT— NO WAIT— IT MOVED—"
Laddu frowned.
"What are you doing?"
Barfi replied casually, like discussing groceries.
"Fighting a ghoul." 👻
Silence.
Absolute.
Maya whispered,
"…Of course."
Candy clapped once, then froze.
"REAL ghoul?"
Hawk's sharp voice cut in, loud and urgent:
"It's running! SHOOT!"
Two fast shots rang out.
BANG. BANG.
Mother covered her mouth. 😨
Mochi stared at Laddu, eyes wide.
"…This is normal?" she asked.
Laddu nodded.
"Yes."
On the phone, Barfi sighed.
"It lives in a well," he explained.
"Very rude. Doesn't pay rent." 🕳️
Walter yelled again,
"WHY IS IT ALWAYS A WELL."
Hawk snapped,
"FOCUS."
Candy leaned closer to the phone.
"Uncle Barfi, are you winning?"
Barfi paused.
"…Define winning."
Another BANG.
Maya sat down slowly.
"I need water." 🚰
Mother rubbed her forehead.
"You call this friendship?"
Laddu smiled proudly.
"Yes," he said.
"Adventure pack." 🎒
Mochi gently took the phone.
"Please be careful," she said firmly.
Barfi laughed lightly.
"Don't worry," he replied.
"Hawk is here."
Hawk added immediately,
"Eyes up. Left side."
A final burst of noise.
Then footsteps.
Then breathing.
Barfi came back on, calmer.
"Okay," he said.
"It ran."
Laddu nodded.
"Good. Dinner later?"
Barfi thought.
"…After we seal the well."
Walter groaned,
"I HATE WELLS."
Laddu smiled at the family.
"See?" he said.
"Normal call."
Mother stared at him.
"Next time," she said slowly,
"call before dinner. Not during apocalypse."
Candy clapped again. 👏
"BEST FRIENDS EVER."
Mochi didn't smile.
But she didn't ask him to hang up either.
The call ended.
The café stayed quiet for three full seconds.
Then Maya spoke.
"…You weren't lying."
Laddu leaned back, satisfied.
"I told you," he said.
"Indian sweets come with spice." 🌶️🍬
Somewhere far away, a well was being sealed.
And in the café, everyone accepted a new truth:
Laddu's friends were exactly as dangerous
as advertised. 😌💥