Fin and Jax sat in Fin's private study, each with a glass of whiskey in hand.
"Do you want the bad news, or the really bad news?" Fin began, his tone dry.
Jax let out a short laugh. "What in the gods' name could possibly be bad news after today" he said, shaking his head.
"Actually, don't answer that." He added darkly.
Fin leaned back in his chair. "Rex and Nova's souls are bonded together through Onyx. Good news, it can be platonic. Bad news, we're stuck with Rex."
Jax chuckled and nodded slowly. "I saw the bonding happen. I wasn't sure what it meant, but that's much better than I feared."
Fin took a long breath. "There's some other bad news," he said quietly.
Jax's expression shifted, more serious now.
"You've seen how Nova's been getting sick, throwing up blood after using her own magic? Channeling is different. She was channeling me the whole time while she was on Onyx. Those arrows were my magic."
"I figured that." Jax nodded.
"Her magic, when she uses too much, it's hurting her. Her wolf and her are weakening. The panic attacks haven't stopped. And every morning when she wakes up, I feel it seeping through her… something dark, something wrong. She hasn't been okay since she severed your bond. Not in the slightest."
Fin's voice cracked. "She loves me and she loves you. I feel it through our matebond."
Jax froze.
Fin continued, his tone quieter now but steady. "I know you love her, Jax. I see it every time you look at her. You've been in agony—there are circles under your eyes, and I know you too damn well. We've known each other since we were infants, and I can tell when you're hurting. You've been suffering in silence. It reminds me of how I was when she was with you—when no one knew she was my fated mate and it was tearing me apart."
Jax's eyes glistened, the emotion sharp but controlled. No tears fell, but his jaw tightened as he looked away.
Fin continued, "You didn't even look at Marra when she was rejected." He gave a soft laugh, shook his head. "I mean damn… rough day for Marra."
He continued, "Nova was so confused by that. You had loved her so much and she thought you'd love Marra that way too. She waited for you to run to Marra and comfort her and planned on helping after you did that. She waited, but you didn't move. So she stepped forward. She thought you were maybe ill or something was wrong."
He shook his head again, still half laughing, the absurdity of it softening the weight of everything else.
"I know you love Nova so much it hurts," Fin said quietly. "And I feel it—through her. You're still connected to her. She feels it too, but she doesn't realize it. I've started to tell the difference now… when it's her I'm feeling, and when it's you."
Jax looked at him and swallowed hard, his voice breaking before he even spoke. He opened his mouth, closed it, then wiped his eyes with the back of his hand, trying—and failing—to steady himself.
Fin's heart cracked at the sight. This was his oldest friend, the one who'd been by his side since before they could walk—and he'd been suffering deeply. Alone. He knew the feeling all too well.
Jax spoke, his voice low but rough with emotion. "It kills me that Nova doesn't understand it was her that was special. She still thinks I didn't feel a pull. When she and Marra were having tea, hearing her say those things. Especially that I wasn't sure of her at first couldn't be the furthest thing from the truth. And hearing it from her… it felt wrong."
He took a long, steadying breath. "You would be correct, Fin. I love her deeply and I couldn't stop if I tried. It's been literal hell. But I promise you, I've kept my distance and kept her at arms length. I want you both to be happy."
Fin nodded slowly. "Therein lies the problem," he said quietly.
He took a long breath, steadying himself before continuing. "Severing your bond is killing Nova, Jax. It's tearing her wolf apart and her with it."
Fin's calm gaze locked on him, "I know you're fated to Marra. I want her as your counterpart gamma. She's valuable and she belongs on our side. But as far as love goes…" Fin's voice softened. "Can you honestly tell me you love her?"
Jax didn't hesitate. "I respect her," he said simply. "And I agree…she's valuable. We need her. She's brilliant and her story is one worth telling. On paper, she's everything I should want." He exhaled and looked down, jaw tight.
"But no. I don't burn for her. Not even close. The sparks are actually dimmer every time I see her like they're fading on their own. And when I'm near her and Nova…" He gave a bitter laugh. "The stark comparison makes it worse. Nova's scent, her presence, overpowers Marra. It makes the matebond feel obsolete. I guess the talk of how a fated bond conquers all, is a damn lie."
Fin exhaled slowly, feeling relief strangely. "I'm not pressuring you," he said quietly. "It's just… an idea. I know you have Marra, and I love Nova more than I can ever put into words. But I also see what this is doing to us—all three of us."
Jax's jaw flexed, his hands gripping the arms of the chair until his knuckles went white. He didn't speak.
"We could see if it does get better with time," Fin continued, his tone steady but gentle, "or, we could share her. We've shared everything our whole lives—training, command, battles. If it's anyone, I'm glad it's you."
Jax's throat worked, but no words came.
"Nova is mine," Fin said finally, his voice low but certain. "And you're mated to Marra. Those are facts. But it doesn't mean you can't still be with Nova. She'll struggle with it at first. Gods, she'll probably fight us both on it—but I'm strangely at peace with it. If you are."
Jax's knuckles went white, the silence stretching between them like a drawn bowstring.
After a long pause, he finally spoke.
"Marra suggested that," he said, shaking his head, disbelief flickering across his face.
Fin huffed a quiet laugh. "Smart woman."
"I just—" Jax exhaled, rubbing the back of his neck. "I don't want Nova to feel uncomfortable. We have to make sure it doesn't affect us."
Fin's lips curved into a small grin. "So you have thought about it."
Jax groaned, running a hand through his hair. "Yeah, I have. But I never in a million years expected you to bring it up."
Fin nodded, his expression softening but firm. "We'll make sure it's not uncomfortable. This doesn't have to look like anything anyone's ever done before. It can be fluid… whatever works for us." He leaned back, his eyes dark but resolute. "Nova doesn't have a choice. I'm putting my foot down. It's hurting her. It's hurting you. And it's killing me to watch."
Jax nodded, staring into the fire.
He smiled faintly. "And when Nova wears one of those outfits Cael buys for Elle, both of us can veto. She'll be outvoted," he said with a smirk.
Fin laughed. "Gods, that would be nice. And when she tries something reckless—like running off to protect us—she'll have to get past both of us."
They both laughed.
"She completely bluffed in that council meeting. Everyone bought it, including me. And Aeron played right into it," Jax said, grinning. "I was so damn proud."
He chuckled. "Her look of guilt was so adorable. Like she'd murdered an Elder and hid the body behind a tapestry."
"Gods… she's so adorable sometimes," Fin said, his voice softening. "When I carried her home from that speakeasy, she was furious with me. She had her arms crossed and a serious, angry look on her face. It melted me."
Jax laughed, shaking his head. "I'd pay to see that. She never got mad at me, but I can only imagine the makeup sex after."
"She marked me again," Fin said flatly, "and knocked me out cold."
Jax nearly spit out his whiskey. "She marked you again?"
"Yeah. I marked her a split second after she started. My wolf did it on instinct. She woke me up the next morning with her blood because I was running a fever."
Jax snorted, setting his glass down. "I fought the urge to re-mark her more times than I can count."
"No point in fighting it," Fin said, his tone calm but firm.
Fin added, "The first ceremony—when she became Gamma and your ancestors shot to the ceiling?"
Jax nodded, already knowing where this was headed.
"I was in literal agony," Fin said, shaking his head. "I could smell her in heat. My wolf was trying to surge forward, to mark her right there—and mate with her—in front of everyone. It was insane. I was having an internal battle the entire time. I had to hold my breath and couldn't even look at her."
Jax burst out laughing. "That happened to me too. At that ceremony—and again at her coronation. My wolf was trying to mate with her right there. It was ridiculous."
"The coronation wasn't far behind." Fin admitted, chuckling. "Even when our ancestors were scaring the daylights out of her with that damn warning, she was getting waves of heat. I could feel it through our matebond, and I had to hold my breath and look away."
Jax took a long drink, shook his head, and snorted. "Our ancestors have a fucked-up sense of humor. Do you think they have wagers on which one of us would lose control first?"
"Oh, absolutely. They got bored scaring Nova and reminding us we've died a thousand stupid deaths. Now they're placing bets on which one of us humps the nearest piece of furniture at a ceremony. It's peak entertainment for them." Fin said.
Jax shook his head rubbing his face, with a laugh "The first time that happened, Nova thought I was feeling hot. She thought she was feeling me through the matebond."
Fin nodded, exhaling a dry laugh. "After her Luna Ceremony, I brought her back up to our room, literally dying for her… and then she threw up blood. Followed by us discovering gashes all over her. Then she and Elle decide they want to get themselves killed in quicksand. Needless to say…" He gave Jax a knowing look.
Jax burst out laughing and took another sip of whiskey, shaking his head. He was feeling the same strange peace Fin had found earlier—realizing how easy it was to talk like this. Like they'd both been fighting the same battles in silence.
"When she goes into heat again…" Jax said, his tone dark, a crooked grin tugging at his mouth. "Get ready."
Fin arched a brow with a smirk. "Why?"
"Guess how many times in one night?" Jax said, leaning back, shaking his head.
Fin thought for a second. Their sex was always wild. Eight to ten rounds wasn't unusual. He figured it'd be higher, maybe a little over double. "Twenty five times?"
Jax burst out laughing. "No."
Fin frowned. "Fifty?!" he asked, incredulous.
Jax laughed again, dark and smug. "Oh, no. Over a hundred times. I lost count. My dick was so sore the next day, gods help me."
Fin choked on his whiskey, sputtering. "Over a hundred?!"
Jax nodded, still grinning. "Didn't even get my pants all the way down. I had been fighting it since the ceremony."
Fin blinked and laughed. "I've done that before."
"After five or six rounds, she got on top of me and ripped my clothes off. I tried to pick her up and get her into a cold bath but she pushed me back down and said, 'No,'" Jax said, shaking his head, laughing at the memory.
"Nova? Our Nova?" Fin said, utterly in disbelief.
Jax looked him dead in the eye, still laughing, "Oh yeah. Our Nova."
"Gods, that sounds so hot," Fin said with a strain in his voice, shaking his head.
"It was," Jax said, laughing. "But trust me—it's a two-person job. I couldn't walk the next morning."
"Lucky for her," Fin said with a chuckle and a nod.
Jax smirked, swirling his drink. "When I finally got her in the cold bath, I told her to dunk her head under the water. She came up blushing because I was seeing her naked—after we'd just had sex in every part of the room and the bathroom." He broke into laughter, shaking his head at the absurdity.
Fin laughed with him. "She still gets shy around me too."
Jax sighed. "That won't go away."
"A few times when she passed out—like the night she had quicksand river water all over her—I took off her clothes, obviously," Fin said with a laugh. "She always wakes up naked, flustered, blushing like crazy. I can feel it through the matebond. Like I haven't seen her before."
Jax chuckled. "It was like that for me too. She's the most beautiful woman I've ever seen. Every time I saw her naked, it knocked the wind out of me. Hell, even today—for a second."
Fin nodded, his grin softening. "I have the same thing. Every time. Like she was carved by the gods themselves."
Jax looked down into his glass, voice low. "I feel her love for you, you know. It's real. Deep. You should know that."
Fin's eyes lifted, studying him.
Jax went on, "And I felt you surge love and calmness into her at the coronation ceremony. Didn't realize what it was until you did it a second time after the ceremony. I knew then that what you two have—it's something deeper than what she and I had." He shook his head, almost to himself. "The gashes on your back, the way you take her pain with her… I felt Lycura's Kiss too, both times. But not like you did."
Fin sighed, setting his glass down. "You bring out her carefree side. The playful, teasing part of her I love to see. You make the heavy stuff disappear just by being near her." He paused, thoughtful. "Since being mated to her, all I've managed to do was add to it."
He leaned back, rubbing a hand over his face. "She doesn't realize I can feel all of her emotions. Not just the intense ones. All of them."
Jax barked a laugh. "She doesn't need to know that. Cael hasn't told Elle either. The three of us have gotten pretty damn good at keeping our emotions flat over the years. They haven't had to notice."
Fin laughed, shaking his head. "How mad do you think they're going to be when they find out we can hear their mindlinks and feel everything?"
Jax grinned, setting his glass down. "Mad enough to plot revenge. Gods, the two of them get into trouble every time they leave this castle alone."
Fin smirked. "Then it's a good thing we never let them."
The fire popped, and for the first time that night, both men laughed without the weight of the world pressing on their shoulders.