Her hands were shaking, her breaths short and shallow. Fin's heart cracked down the middle.
"Hey," he whispered, pulling her against his chest with firm gentleness. "Match my breathing, okay? In… out… Just like that."
He held her close, steadying her body with his warmth. Her cheek was cold against his chest, her fingers curled into his shirt like she was anchoring herself to the edge of the world.
He'd had these attacks before. Years ago, after returning from the Bloodsoil War. After his father died. Sometimes it wasn't the screams or the scent of blood that triggered it — it was something simple. A chain against a wall. The sound of dripping water. Then the spiral came, and breathing became a battlefield.
"I've got you," he said quietly. He held her for a few minutes waiting for her breathing to slow.
"Th‑th‑thank you," she whispered, voice still shaky.
He gave her the smallest smile and said, deadpan, "Well… I was planning to yell at three platoon leads, fill out three hours of Council paperwork, and drink alone tonight. But instead I got screamed at by a prisoner and now I'm doing breathing exercises with my best friend's mate. So. Great night."
Nova let out a watery laugh — the sound fragile but real.
"There it is," he said, grinning. "Told you you'd laugh."
He wanted to kiss her forehead and hold her forever. But instead, he scooped her up and carried her to the oversized couch near the fireplace. It crackled gently, warming the space with a flickering amber glow.
He draped a blanket over her legs.
"Have you ever had whiskey?" he asked.
She blinked. "N‑no."
"Well," Fin said, opening a nearby cabinet and pouring a small amount into a glass, "Elias would not approve of this. So naturally, I'm doing it."
He handed her the glass. She took it with both hands, still trembling.
"It calms my nerves sometimes," he admitted. "After my father died… and I came home from that war… I'd start to panic when I'd see certain things."
He stared into the fire for a moment.
"Rusty iron chains. Stone walls that echo. The sound of boots scuffing on stone. Nothing loud — just… quiet memories."
Nova watched him quietly. He rarely spoke like this. So open. So unguarded.
"I'm s-s-sorry. That m‑must have been really difficult," she said softly.
"It was." He glanced at her, offering a tired smile. "But I got through it. And so will you."
Nova took a small sip of the whiskey, then coughed hard. It burned more than she expected.
Fin chuckled softly beside her. "You drink that like someone who's never broken the rules before."
"I just d‑did." She grinned, breath catching as the heat went down.
Their eyes met.
There was something between them — something unspoken, unacknowledged. But real. It wasn't just silence; it was the weight of silence. A feeling. A pull.
She looked away first.
He stared at her a second longer, then quietly poured himself another glass. Both of them turning their attention to the fire.
But the stillness between them was deceptive.
Fin felt it — through the bond. Confusion. Her emotions were tangled like thread, knotted and pulling tight.
Was something inside her shifting because she was beginning to sense the mate bond between them? Or was it something else — something raw and real that existed outside the bond? A feeling she was trying to bury because she loved Jax… and would always be loyal to him.
Fin understood. He felt it, because he'd tried to do the same — to smother the impossible pull between them. To stay away. To pretend he didn't ache when she wasn't near. Because Jax was his brother in all but blood. Because he had duties. Because this wasn't supposed to happen.
And now Fin couldn't stop wondering and hoping: Did she care for him without the mate bond? Genuine care that wasn't from being fated. It was from her truly seeing him?
Fin shook his head, trying to push the thoughts away.
He should tell Jax the truth. He wanted to.
But the idea of putting his oldest friend through that kind of pain twisted something deep in his chest.
Nova had come of age a few months ago. The bond hadn't surfaced yet, but it would. That much was inevitable. They were on borrowed time.
And when it did… what then? Would she reject the bond and do what he already decided he'd be unable to do?
The thought of her turning away from him, hit like a blade to the ribs.
He'd buried all of this for weeks. Longer. Told himself it would pass.
Told himself she belonged to Jax.
Told himself loyalty meant silence.
Especially when Jax left.
But now… with every passing day, every look, every breath she took near him — that silence was getting harder to hold.
His wolf was pacing like a caged beast.
Xeon: Mine. Mate.
Fin stiffened.
Fin:She's mated to Jax. He loves her. He's a brother to me and I won't betray him.
Xeon:You finally claimed her to your Council. It was indirect, but it's progress.
Fin:She's confused. I don't want to cause her more pain.
Xeon:She was in pain when you stayed away. You felt it. And you're weaker when you're not near her.
Fin:I let Meredith—
Xeon:—pleasure your body. Not your soul. Don't confuse the two. If you'd let yourself try even a little when she arrived, she would've marked you before the bond took effect.
Fin clenched his jaw. He hated how right Xeon was.
Xeon:Jax and Nova are a good match, yes. But you and her would be deeper. And I would know. Because her wolf was once mine.
Fin blinked.
Fin:What?
Xeon: Her wolf was fated to me many lifetimes ago. And I have not mated with another since. Not with any Alpha King I've guided. I have waited thousands of years to find her again.
Fin: I don't understand.
Xeon: You are not a singular being. Your spirit and my spirit are within you. That is how it is with all shifters — the human and the wolf are not the same. They are bound, intertwined, and we, the wolves, have memories that stretch further than yours.
Fin's breath caught, eyes narrowing as he listened.
Xeon: Across every generation of Alpha Kings I've guided, I protected them and served their line. I helped them find their mates. But I never mated in wolf form. I never marked because she — my mate — had not returned.
Fin thought back to the pack runs, to wolves mating in their shifted forms — how strange it always seemed.
Xeon: You wonder why some wolves mate while shifted and mark again? Most wolf spirits take new mates across lifetimes because it's painful to not. It's extremely rare for a spirit within to find its counterpart, and there is an impossible hunger to claim what was once lost.
Fin's heart thundered in his chest.
Xeon: Her wolf is like me. Old. Powerful. But she's guided only one other that I've ever known — the Queen of her own time. She was mine.
Fin staggered in his thoughts — suddenly everything felt too large for him. Like he was standing in the middle of a storm that had begun before he was ever born.
Xeon:She chose Nova. I knew the moment I saw her wolf. That's why we ache.
Fin: You're saying… we're fated? Because of you and her wolf?
Xeon: No. It's very rare for wolf spirits to find their true mate again. You would have been fated to her even if I wasn't your wolf. And if you somehow weren't fated to her, you would have fallen in love regardless. The mortal part of you is drawn to her not because of me, but because she is everything your soul seeks and your body craves.
Fin swallowed. Those words were heavy.
Xeon: Fated bonds like ours… they're more than just love. They are divine and powerful. Destiny. But she is already drawn to you — not by the bond, but by the truth of who you are.
Fin held his breath, afraid to hope.
Xeon:When she and her wolf remember, our bond will surge — stronger than what she shares with Jax. It will eclipse it, overpower it, reshape everything she thinks she knows. You will feel it stronger as well. The urge to mark will consume the both of you.
Xeon paused for a moment, letting his words sink in.
Xeon:But destiny does not chain her. Even then… she could still refuse us. She has a choice. There is always a choice.
Fin:Why didn't you tell me all this sooner?
Xeon:I couldn't feel her at first… her wolf was fading. I didn't know for sure until we ran with her to find Jax. I finally saw her shift and her beautiful wolf up close. And for the record… I've been telling you for months. But you, dear stubborn bastard, ignore me constantly.
Fin chuckled to himself.
Xeon: See her eyes flicker silver with some gold. She is talking to her wolf right now too. I feel her wolf is confused but senses something familiar. You should ask her.
"Is your wolf talking to you too?" Fin asked. Her eyes snapped to him, shocked.
"H-how d-did you know?" She stammered.
"My wolf told me." Fin said.
She didn't respond right away. Fin was glad her breathing had returned normal.
"Does your wolf…." She hesitated for a second. "Does your wolf know my wolf?"
"Yes." Fin didn't hesitate. They stared at each other. Fin felt a lump form in his throat.
Whatever happened, one thing was for certain, he wanted her in his life. She would be brilliant in the counsel and war rooms.
But most importantly, he loved her.
She stared back at the fire, eyes flickering. Fin wondered what her wolf was saying and watched her.