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Chapter 38 - Chapter 38: Fuck... I'm Just a Freebie??

Several days later, Sarutobi Hiruzen finally returned to Konoha with the follow-up reinforcements.

The front line had completely collapsed. The invading forces were no longer acting as a single army—they had scattered throughout the Land of Fire. At this point, marching back to stop them was pointless.

Inside the Hokage's assembly hall, Hiruzen gathered with the clan heads and village leadership.

"That's the situation."

When the Third Hokage finished speaking, everyone below sucked in a deep breath.

"With things as they are… does anyone have suggestions?"

People looked at one another, but eventually all eyes drifted toward the Nara clan head.

"Ahem… Rokujin, what do you think?"

Nara Rokujin rose with a helpless expression. "Why is everyone looking at me…"

"Lord Hokage, I believe our priority should be reinforcing the village's defenses. Since the border has been breached, securing Konoha comes first."

"From your reports, Hanzō of the Salamander possesses a tremendously destructive technique—yet with minimal drawbacks. But he shouldn't be able to use it repeatedly."

"The good news is that Sunagakure and Amegakure have already turned on each other. Neither side trusts the other, so they can't mount coordinated attacks. That reduces our pressure significantly."

"The latest intel says Suna and Ame squads are looting separately in the Land of Fire. And judging by your analysis, Hanzō seems extremely greedy for money. If we offer him enough benefits, we might be able to ally with the Ame ninja to eliminate the Suna."

"In our current state, no matter the price, driving them out would already be a bargain."

"No."

A voice cut sharply through the hall.

"Shimamura-dono, is there an issue?"

"Nara, your idea has merit. But have you forgotten—Amegakure already declared war on the Land of Fire and on Konoha."

"For the first time in history, a small country declared war on a great nation. That alone is a slap to Konoha's face. We are the foremost of the Five Great Nations."

"Ame only dared because Suna was backing them. Without Sunagakure, Hanzō and his Rain ninja wouldn't stir up anything meaningful. That technique of his can be countered if we prepare properly."

"What we should be considering is burying them here in the Land of Fire. If we really ally with Amegakure, the prestige of the Number One Hidden Village will be gone."

"I'd rather lose to Sunagakure than bow to Amegakure."

"But we're already forced into a defensive position. We don't have enough troops to push them back. Only by cooperating with Ame can we end this quickly and cheaply."

"No troops? Then forcibly conscript the retired ninja. Issue IDs to all unregistered shinobi. Reinstate the wartime Genin and wartime Chūnin system."

"That's exactly what the Second Hokage's policies were for."

"We'll easily gather three to five thousand extra fighters. Add that to the three thousand regular troops you brought back—we'd have enough to drive them out."

"No. Wartime Genin are barely combat-capable. Throwing them onto a battlefield is sending them to die."

"But Lord Hokage—you don't want Amegakure trampling us, do you!?"

Hiruzen sat silently in turmoil.

"Tsk… Shimura really did brainwash his clan into warmongers. That sharp tongue must be hereditary."

At that moment, an ANBU agent appeared behind him.

"Lord Hokage, an urgent message from the Daimyō."

A black scroll was placed before him. The arguing quieted immediately—everyone wanted to hear what the Daimyō had to say.

"What does the Daimyō say?"

Hiruzen frowned deeply.

"Suna and Ame ninja have already looted many villages. The Daimyō demands we resolve this quickly. Otherwise, he'll be forced to use Konoha's military budget to restore stability among the common people."

"And… the Daimyō and several nobles are furious with Sunagakure. They demand severe punishment."

"Amegakure seems unwilling to provoke the nobles of the Land of Fire. They've only attacked civilians. Sunagakure, however, robbed both civilians and nobles clean."

"Lastly, the Daimyō demands that we either negotiate peace or expel both forces within two months. At this rate, the chaos will spiral beyond control."

"What are your thoughts?"

"Lord Hokage, judging by this, Amegakure doesn't want total war with us. We still have room to negotiate with them. My earlier suggestion may still work."

"Mm. Makes sense."

"No. They tore relations with us the moment they declared war. The only reason they're hesitant now is fear of reprisal after the war."

"Remember—we used to export half of Amegakure's food supply."

"With all nations at war now, no one will export to them. If we stall long enough, they'll collapse."

"Shimamura, did you forget they're already looting our country? They're surviving through plunder—and they're gaining far more than they spend. Your idea doesn't hold."

"So you want peace talks!?"

"Exactly. We can't focus on just one front."

"There are other battlefields. Suna and Ame aren't only affecting this region—their spread disrupts all supply lines."

"So Lord Hokage, are we really going to let Ame trample us!?"

Hiruzen's face twitched.

"The Daimyō gave us two months. After that, all other fronts will suffer."

"One warfront has already collapsed. We can't afford another."

"Shimamura, we must accept reality. We can't drag this out anymore. While the chaos is still contained, we must either ally with one side to crush the other, or negotiate with both."

"Sunagakure would happily agree to a truce—they already have a better target: the Land of Earth."

"With the Third Tsuchikage dead, the Land of Earth is headless and barely defended. Compared to guerrilla war against us, it's a far more appealing target."

"We can resolve this with minimal cost."

"So you'd weaken us before the world?"

"I understand your anger. But you said something true earlier—Amegakure depends on our exports."

"If we give them a lump-sum compensation now, it's still less than what they'd steal in the long run. It only feels painful because it's all at once."

"Amegakure can't produce anything. Once they burn through that supply, they must turn to invasion. But with a treaty, they'll have no reason to attack us—so they'll naturally turn toward the Land of Earth."

"As for Hanzō—even the Land of Wind wouldn't tolerate him forever. Once the war ends, Amegakure will face the combined pressure of Fire, Earth, and Wind."

"Not even Hanzō can support an entire nation on his own. Eventually…"

Hiruzen nodded. "As expected of the Nara clan head. We'll follow your plan."

"All actions are for the greater good."

"Does anyone else wish to add anything?"

Realizing the tide had turned, the Shimura clan head swallowed his fury.

"It's a pity the Uchiha clan is entirely deployed on the front lines… If they were here, they'd support me."

After hesitating, he stood again.

"Lord Hokage, since the Suna–Ame alliance is fractured… If we sign a truce with Sunagakure, we can force them to join us against Amegakure."

The suggestion seemed to spark something in Hiruzen's mind.

"Hmm. Good point. I'll attempt it."

"Anyone else?"

"In that case, we'll adjourn."

He paused.

"At this point, the responsibility lies with me. I failed to properly assess the strength and intentions of Salamander Hanzō and the Third Kazekage. Konoha has suffered greatly because of that."

"When the war ends… I will resign as Hokage and nominate the Fourth."

Stunned gasps echoed across the chamber, but Hiruzen walked out before they could react. Mitokado Homura and Utatane Koharu hurried after him.

---

Meanwhile, after days of running, Hanzō finally returned to Amegakure and allowed himself to breathe.

The remaining battles didn't require his attention. Looting, hit-and-run tactics—grab what you can and disappear. Impossible to catch. No need to worry further.

All that remained was waiting for his shinobi to return, pockets full.

At the same time, deep in Ame's prison—

A battered and barely conscious Jiraiya was thrown into the cell shared by Tsunade and Orochimaru.

Several other wounded Konoha shinobi were dragged in as well, though placed in separate cells.

The Sannin were finally reunited.

"Jiraiya!"

Tsunade and Orochimaru both snapped to attention.

"Your injuries are terrible… but you're still alive. Lucky fool," Tsunade muttered.

Jiraiya, however, puffed out his chest proudly.

"What are you talking about? I got like this completing a super-S-rank mission! Sure, I'm lying here now, but the mission itself—I finished it."

Tsunade snorted. "Who in this battlefield would even give you a mission?"

"The Old Man—the Third."

"Back when you two covered my escape…"

...

"And that's it. I lost consciousness after that. Don't know what happened next."

"I see," Tsunade said, brows knitted together. Orochimaru's expression darkened as well.

"Never expected Hanzō to have a trump card like that."

"At least sensei should be safe for now… but we don't know what Hanzō plans to trade us for."

"But you two being alive is what matters," Jiraiya said. "Sensei and I both thought you were dead—we were ready to avenge you."

"Um… Three Sannin-sama," a voice came from the next cell over. "I was still half-conscious back then. I heard some of the fighting… and the negotiation afterward."

"At the time…"

...

"And that's how it went. Hanzō made an offer to the Hokage—he wants ransom money in exchange for you three."

"Hanzō said… to ransom Lady Tsunade, the price would be one hundred million ryō."

…Tsunade nodded, satisfied.

"For Lord Orochimaru, thirty-five million."

…Orochimaru blinked, surprised he was valued that highly.

"For us regular ninja… they're only charging medical fees."

…Jiraiya frowned, confused.

"What about me? How much did he ask for me?"

"Uh… well…" The ninja hesitated.

Jiraiya's eyes lit up. "Let me guess—my unyielding spirit moved him so deeply he asked for some outrageous amount?"

"Um…"

When he still wouldn't answer, Jiraiya nodded knowingly. "Don't worry. I won't let Hanzō exploit Konoha like that. I'd rather die than see the village pay a massive ransom for me."

"No, no, Jiraiya-sama," the ninja stammered. "Salamander Hanzō said… if Konoha ransoms Tsunade-sama and Orochimaru-sama together… then, um… you… you'd be thrown in for free."

His voice grew smaller and smaller…

Pffft—

"Kh—kh!—khk!"

Tsunade clamped a hand over her mouth, visibly straining to hold something back.

Orochimaru's chest hitched—he choked hard.

"Ha!?"

Jiraiya stared at them, aghast.

"Tsunade—the dungeon is damp, right? Bad for the respiratory system. That's why you're—cough—coughing. Definitely not—" Orochimaru said, voice breaking.

"A-haha—Jiraiya, listen, we're shinobi. We're trained not to laugh. We'd never laugh unless we absolutely couldn't hold it in—"

"AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA—!!!"

The dungeon instantly filled with an atmosphere of pure, unrestrained laugh.

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