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Chapter 1 - Chapter 1: The debt

Lance's phone started buzzing against the desk just as he finished typing the last line of his assignment.

He didn't have to check the screen to know who it was. His mother only ever called at this hour when something was wrong.

But he answered anyway.

"Mom?"

For a moment, all he heard was breathing. Then the quiet breathing turned into shaking breaths, and then into the kind of crying he hadn't heard from her since he was a kid.

"Lance," she said, voice breaking in the middle of his name. "Sweetheart, I… I don't know what to do."

His stomach tightened. "What happened?"

"It's your father," she said. "He lost his job this morning. They said the company was downsizing and they let him go without warning. We thought we had more time but we don't. The bank called today. They said if we don't start paying back at least part of the debt, they're going to begin the process on the house."

Lance closed his eyes and leaned back in his chair. "How much do they want?"

"Enough that I can't cover it," she whispered. "My salary isn't enough for the mortgage and the bills and everything else. Your siblings' school is already threatening late fees and… I'm trying, Lance, I swear I'm trying, but I don't know what else to cut."

Her voice cracked again, raw and panicked in a way that twisted something inside him.

"Mom, I'm still in college.." he said quietly. "I'm working as much as I can, but my part-time pay won't cover a fraction of what you're talking about."

"We've already used up every favor we can ask for," she said. "Your father is so angry. He keeps blaming himself. He keeps saying he ruined everything. I'm… I'm so tired of watching him fall apart."

Lance ran a hand over his face. "How much is left now?"

There was a long pause, like she was afraid of saying it out loud.

"Three hundred and fifty thousand," she whispered.

He felt his throat tighten. He'd known it was bad, but hearing the number again made him feel like the floor had dropped out beneath him.

"I'm sorry," she said, crying again. "I know you've already paid as much as you could. I know you've been working nonstop. I know you've tried harder than any of us."

Lance stared at his laptop screen, at the spreadsheet he'd been pretending would help him keep his life organized.

He thought about the first ten thousand he'd scraped together after eight months of working every spare hour he had.

He thought about the other ten thousand he'd made by setting up an account he never told anyone about, filming things he didn't want to think about now, letting strangers use him in ways he tried to forget.

"I'll figure something out," he said, even though he had no idea how. "Don't worry about it right now. I'll think of something."

"You always say that," she whispered. "I hate that I have to rely on you. You should be focusing on school, not fixing our mistakes."

"It's fine." It was a lie, and she probably knew it, but he didn't know what else to tell her. "I'll handle it."

After a moment, she exhaled shakily. "Thank you, honey. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."

They ended the call slowly, neither wanting to be the one to hang up first. When the line finally went quiet, Lance let the phone fall onto the table.

He stayed still for a long moment before he finally shut his laptop. There was no point staring at assignments when his head was spinning like this. His next shift started at noon, and if he didn't get moving, he'd be late.

He pushed himself out of the chair and walked toward the fridge, though he wasn't hungry.

He just needed to take his mind off things, by staring at the sad contents of his refrigerator.

"I should buy more beer on my way back, but then again Henry might drag me off to the bar, so I'll just move buying it, to tomorrow when I'm sober.."

Yeah!

Drinking with Henry meant if they weren't drunk to the point of forgetting themselves then they weren't leaving.

But at least Henry was good company, making him forget about his problems each time.

He checked his phone again, 11:20. He had 40 minutes to bathe, dress and clock in for his shift.

And it was a 10 minute ride from the bus stop to Cafe where he worked.

So he needed to hurry.

The manager hated his guts and he couldn't complain, after all he had been the catalyst that ruined her relationship.

If only he had just arrived at work a few minutes late, then the whole issue with her boyfriend confessing his love for him wouldn't have happened.

Sighing, he took off his clothes tossing them into a hamper as he stepped into the bathroom.

He turned on the shower, regulating it between hot and cold to find the right temperature.

He had a 10 hour shift today, he didn't know how he was going to manage with only 4 hours of sleep and still go drinking with Henry.

Henry also worked at the Cafe with Lance, but he was financially well off and only worked there because Lance was there.

A million different ideas ran through Lance's mind as he scrubbed his body.

Should he resume his OF account? He always kept his face hidden so no one would know it was him.

Honestly he had no issue with the recording of the video, it was finding men that suit his taste and could satisfy him that was the issue.

"Why the hell did Dad have to borrow so much money? Why am I the one suffering for it?"

He was 24 for crying out loud, he should be having the time of his life, getting laid and making a few bad decisions.

Not getting tied down by a debt that wasn't his.

He didn't even have student loan debt, that's how hard he had worked for his scholarship.

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