Click.
He locked the doors as soon as I got in the car.
When I had checked from outside, the car's windows were tinted pitch-black.
That meant no one could see the two of us inside. And because of the rain, no matter how loud our voices got, they wouldn't leak outside the car.
I confronted Woo Seung-geon, who was comfortably settling into the driver's seat.
"Why did you suddenly come here?"
He fastened his seatbelt and retorted immediately.
"You ignore my texts, you don't answer my calls, you don't check DMs or any other messages. What else could I do but come in person?"
"I'm asking why you came."
"I asked you to have lunch with me."
I was speechless.
I knew he was a man of action, but was he always this impulsive?
I shut my mouth, sensing that arguing further would only lead to an emotional fight.
I took a deep breath and changed the subject.
"You're the starter for tomorrow, aren't you."
"Yeah, it's so unfair. The forecast said the rain would stop by tomorrow. It would be great if it got rained out again."
"…You know you're playing against us. Someone who needs to be managing their condition shouldn't be here."
"What's the big deal? The distance from Seoul to Incheon isn't even that far. It takes less than an hour if there's no traffic."
"It's two PM right now. Lunchtime is over."
"That's why I'm starving. I only had coffee while waiting for you."
"..."
"Are all your questions answered? Then put on your seatbelt. Let's go."
I sat there, unmoving.
As I just stared at Woo Seung-geon, he, who had been ready to drive off at any second, hesitated.
He didn't avoid my gaze, just kept looking right back at me.
His gaze, which had been on my eyes, traveled down and fixed on my lips.
The sticky emotion clinging to his stare changed the air inside the car.
He was blatantly watching my lips as I bit them, and the front teeth visible between them.
A strange tension tightened around my throat.
'This is why I didn't want to meet.'
Because it was hard to handle this atmosphere, which would naturally turn into this.
Because I was afraid that if I looked at this handsome face, so handsome it was hard to believe he was an athlete, I would end up telling him to do whatever he wanted.
I released the lip I had been pressing between my teeth.
Woo Seung-geon's gaze remained fixed on my lip as it bounced back.
His Adam's apple bobbed once.
After swallowing dryly, he managed to lift his fixed gaze and look into my eyes again.
His dark eyes seemed to have grown even deeper in color than when I first saw them.
"Stop being angry. You ignored my messages, so this was the only method I could think of."
His voice, too, seemed to have dropped a tone lower.
I couldn't stand this atmosphere.
I deliberately turned my head away.
I avoided his gaze and replied, "I apologize if you waited because of me."
Who was I to act so arrogantly, even after hearing an apology from a senior who was like the heavens above me?
I continued cautiously, trying my best not to make a mistake.
"I didn't know how to reply, so I ended up ignoring your messages unintentionally. As for the calls… I was practicing my pitching, so I didn't know they came in."
I'd mixed in a moderate lie. Woo Seung-geon saw this and let out a small laugh.
"It's rare to hear you talk so much."
"..."
"You have nothing to be sorry to me for. If I were you, I'd probably feel burdened too if someone just showed up unannounced."
"..."
"But I am trying to pressure you. Because the reason I came to Korea was you."
At those words, I turned my eyes back to him, my expression hardening.
"You can't be here because of me."
"But I am. That's what I said in my interview when I signed with the Guardians."
"You didn't say it was because of me. You said you were lonely."
"See, you did watch my interview."
Damn. I shut my mouth.
He was still smiling.
"I came because I was lonely without you. I held back for over a year, that's a long time, isn't it?"
Held back.
Heat rushed to my face at that word.
I couldn't hide my flushing face, so I turned my head away again.
Not that it would do any good. My ears were probably bright red, so I couldn't escape his gaze.
"You don't hate it, right?"
Even if I said, 'Yes, I do,' here, it wouldn't be convincing.
Honestly, I didn't hate it.
Was there any reason to?
He was the person I started my day with, to the point that I opened my eyes by searching for his videos.
He was the senior I respected most, my ideal and my dream, a person I liked so much that I wanted to pray for his success more than my own.
So when that very person told me he came all the way to Korea because of me, it was only natural that I couldn't just scowl and say, 'Are you crazy?'
I had seen countless articles about how much he had struggled mentally in the US.
Of course, I didn't fully believe that reason.
I was sure there was another reason, but I couldn't voice my suspicion.
Even if there was a real, separate reason, I couldn't just interrogate a man who had returned home after failing to adapt to his life as a player in the US.
He used his situation like a fox.
"Seong-ha, put on your seatbelt."
His voice was tinged with pleasure.
He seemed to be enjoying this situation, where I was unable to push him away.
"Come on, hmm?"
I couldn't think of anything to say back to his coaxing.
No, the truth was…
"Seong-ha, quickly, grab my shoulders."
It was the exact tone he had used that day, in that situation.
"Haha, it's fine if my back gets scratched. You don't need to worry about my body that much."
The memory of me clenching my fists, afraid of leaving even a single nail mark on his precious body, suddenly surfaced.
And how violently this Woo Seung-geon, who called my name so tenderly, had tormented me.
"Senior, it's too… ah!"
"Hah, so cute, I'm losing my mind, hooh."
"Seung-geon, hyung, please…"
"That's right, you have to endure just a little bit, okay?"
My face grew hot, as if it would explode, from the memories that only became clearer the more I tried to forget.
I was terrified he would notice I was blushing from recalling that day.
I somehow shook off the thoughts and fastened my seatbelt.
Woo Seung-geon watched me and asked playfully, "You suddenly got so obedient. What are you thinking about?"
I clenched my teeth in embarrassment and said, "…Just drive."
He watched me for a moment, then chuckled.
Without asking any more, he shifted the gear.
"Want to go for barbecue? I know a place that's supposed to have great cold noodles, too."
I wished he would just treat me with the cold indifference he was famous for.
But Woo Seung-geon continued to treat me gently.
"We'll go there. I'm starving, I haven't even eaten breakfast."
I glanced at the scenery outside the car window, where the rain was streaming down diagonally.
The ballpark building grew more and more distant.
Unlike the heart of downtown Seoul, our team's home base was on the west coast, so there were few cars on the wide, open road.
The sea was visible beyond the empty road.
A thick fog was rising from the monsoon rain, making the area near the sea look desolate.
The thick rain clouds, the sky dark despite it being midday, the road surface where the lanes were barely visible from the rain, the atmosphere of a street without a single person in sight.
Everything felt ominous, unsettlingly so.
Spending time driving with Woo Seung-geon on a day like this would only add one more burden to my heart.
Even if I went along with him today and got through it, there was no guarantee he wouldn't just show up unannounced like this again.
What if an emotionally-driven choice of his affected the game?
If that became my fault, I would never be able to forgive myself.
I felt the need to clear this situation up so that something like this wouldn't be repeated.
"Was sleeping with me really such a special memory for you?"
At my words, thrown out without warning, Woo Seung-geon's smiling face hardened.
He couldn't turn his head toward me because he was driving, but he looked displeased.
"It might not have been a big deal to you, but it's a precious memory to me. Don't talk about it so carelessly."
I couldn't say anything for a moment.
I couldn't tell if I was being too rational, or if he was being too swayed by emotion.
Whichever it was, I didn't want to placate his feelings with nice words right now.
This impulsive behavior had to end today.
"I'm just telling you the truth. That your memory has been romanticized."
"That's enough. Don't make me angry."
"It was a memory that only you enjoyed, which is why you're unilaterally seeking me out like this."
"What are you trying to say…"
"I have no intention of continuing that kind of relationship with you, Senior. I'm telling you how much of a nuisance this is."
Was it because I had revealed the truth so starkly?
He clamped his mouth shut, as if realizing his mistake.
It was strange and pathetic, seeing the great Woo Seung-geon—who made such perfect, cool-headed judgments on the mound—reacting so emotionally over such a trivial incident with me.
It was two years ago.
The day Woo Seung-geon, who was having a great season in the Major Leagues, came to Korea.
I don't know if he was already in secret contract talks with the Guardians back then, but at the time, he seemed to have entered Korea quietly, without informing the media.
It was pure coincidence that I ran into him, who I'd never dreamed would be in Korea, while he was staying at his family's home in Seoul.
There was a high-end, private-room Japanese restaurant nearby; it seemed he was coming out after meeting someone there.
The problem was that he was very drunk.
"Huh?"
I was so surprised to see a person who was supposed to be in America, and I'd blurted out in recognition before I could stop myself.
At first, Woo Seung-geon didn't recognize me.
No, that's what I thought.
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