Several months passed, and winter arrived. I'm now over ten years old, which is exactly why I decided to do something legendary for all the wrong reasons.
"I'll say it again." Ghislaine, standing opposite me, her hand gripping her black-bladed Flat-core sword, gave a final warning. "If I say stop, you stop. Understood?"
Opposite her, I held my Lion's Tongue with both hands, settling into a combat stance. "Understood! Go all out, ma'am!"
That's right, my latest act of stupidity was challenging the Black Wolf Sword King Ghislaine to a 'serious spar' - meaning we were using real steel. I just hoped I wouldn't get sliced in half like the monsters we occasionally saw Ghislaine slaughter in the forest.
Regardless, I was fairly confident.
After all, a few months ago, I was already able to dodge a Saint-rank level Longsword of Light. Surely I've made some progress since then? I refused to believe otherwise!
"Then, here I come!" The moment Ghislaine finished speaking, I was defeated.
…
Speaking of the Longsword of Light, it's apparently not just a specific sword move focusing on speed and power. Rather, it's a technique users learn to slash incredibly fast. Like that sword style Battousai uses to cut people at high speed. Oh wait, the Sword God Style is basically Hiten Mitsurugi-Ryu. That makes the Water God Style Kamiya Kasshin-Ryu. In that case, my Eris would be Kenshin, and I'd willingly be her Kaoru.
Wait, no, I'm getting off track.
In short, the Longsword of Light doesn't literally mean slashing at the speed of light, it's more of a slightly supernatural metaphor. Like the Longsword of Silence being faster than sound - it's named that because the opponent is cut down before they even hear the blade swing, or by the time they hear it, they're already dead. Meanwhile, the Longsword of Light is (presumably) the upgrade, slashing so fast that ordinary people can't even track it, though it's not literally light speed.
That's where the distinction between which Sword God Style practitioner is stronger comes in - based on whose Longsword of Light is faster and more powerful. Much like the Water God Style's secret arts, even once learned, some people use them better than others. However, since some are faster than others, is it possible someone actually slashes at the speed of light? I asked Ghislaine, and she demonstrated her top speed for me. Honestly, I couldn't tell if that qualified as light speed because I had nothing to measure it with. All I know is I didn't see a damn thing before Ghislaine had already finished her slash, like those frame-skipping effects YouTubers use to fake speed. But this was real speed. Super terrifying.
If I'm lucky enough to return to Earth and have my journey here adapted into an anime, the animators would have it easy - just draw two frames and call it a day.
"My master is even faster than that," Ghislaine said. So there are people even faster. Got it.
This made me wonder: what standard does Master Reida want me to reach when she told me to use the Perfect Reverse on the Longsword of Light? If it's just the Saint-rank level for a bit of casual fun, I might be able to complete the mission in a year or two. But if she means the Sword God-rank Longsword of Light, I should probably just consider chopping off my own hand to save time.
I mean, does Master really want me to spend my whole life practicing the sword!? I have my own life to live, you know!
So, my goal is to train until I can use it against a Saint-rank Longsword of Light, then report back and call the mission complete. Yep yep.
…
A few more months slipped by, and Rudeus's birthday was approaching.
Not much has happened lately. If anything, I started writing poetry with Hilda. I hate to admit it, but she has a real artistic soul and does it better than I do. But Hilda never mocked me, she praised every poem I wrote and even encouraged me to publish them.
And those words were entirely sincere! It really warmed my heart!
So, I didn't hesitate to start calling Hilda 'Mother.'
Oh, Rudeus was also forced to call her Mother. We've basically become the two sons Hilda should have had but lost. Because of that, I'm even more determined to help Philip reclaim his rightful position!
By the way, my pockets are getting quite heavy lately. Aside from the alcohol business which has expanded to several northern territories, I've spent some time researching regional palates and reinventing dishes. I've opened a few fairly successful restaurants in the Royal Capital, Roa, and several other cities in Asura. So suddenly, my cash flow is looking good. To put it bluntly, I'm kind of rich.
If things keep progressing well and I accumulate enough assets, I'll start my biggest project: a papermaking machine.
The reason is simple: paper in this world is expensive as hell. A single sheet of good paper costs enough to feed a person for a whole day. Combined with the fact that printing technology doesn't exist, book prices are astronomical.
So, I think making paper is the necessary first step to lowering book prices, and it's also a great opportunity to dominate a high-potential industry. Hehe, just thinking about becoming a mega-rich billionaire makes me giddy. Once I make a printing press later, I'll be an absolute tycoon!
"But not everyone knows how to read, Acchan," Rudeus noted, giving me a reality check that reminded me my plan wasn't that easy.
I completely forgot I'm in a medieval world where the majority of the commoners are illiterate.
The reason paper and book prices are so high is due to the supply-demand gap (thanks, Philip, for the lesson). If I churn out a mountain of paper and print books like crazy but the number of people who can read them is tiny, I'll be the one going belly-up. So, the first thing to do is raise the literacy rate and get the populace to read more, right? But to do that, I need to ensure they're well-fed and have a surplus of wealth, otherwise, they won't bother going to school.
And to make people well-fed, I need to bring in advanced production methods, improve crops, and so on. But I'm an idiot when it comes to agricultural technology. I mean, I know how to make fertilizer, but how do I dig up nitrogen? With current technology, I can't even make a lightbulb!
And the book-writing profession would vanish because of me if I made a printing press - suddenly, scholars would be unemployed en masse. I don't want to be viewed as a sinner by the intellectuals, if they get the urge to write me into history as a villain, I'm screwed.
In short, it's too much of a headache. Whatever. I've decided to just mooch off the Boreas wealth for now. I'll leave the papermaking stuff for later.
…
Winter drifted away, spring arrived, and now Rudeus's birthday is nearly here. This time, Eris took the lead and was extremely serious about making me keep the party a secret. I don't know if these warnings do any good since Rudeus obviously knows the party is coming anyway. He's not stupid.
But one thing that surprised me was Rudeus's acting ability, it was unexpectedly high-level. He deliberately avoided mentioning his upcoming birthday and avoided the kitchen. He even reminded me, 'Don't let your lack of tact ruin it.'
I know he's looking forward to the party, but did he really have to remind me like that? What did I ever do to deserve this!?
But I didn't want to argue with my only ally, so we decided to do something to kill time. Like sitting around researching magic and continuing our language studies.
On that note, it seems Rudeus has already mastered the Beast God Tongue, Fighting God Tongue, and Demon God Tongue. I hate to admit it, but in this regard, he's a total superhuman. Meanwhile, I've only mastered the Beast God and Fighting God Tongues (since they're actually quite similar to the Human Tongue). As for the Demon God Tongue, no matter what, it still gives me a headache, I've only reached a level where I can do some basic communicate, but my reading, writing and listening is just so-so.
But since I'm just learning for fun and have no plans to go to the Demon Continent or anything, I don't need to try too hard. If I encounter any Demon kind, I can just tell Rudeus to handle them for me. What's the point of having a reincarnated ally otherwise, hehe?
As for magic, my Water and Fire magic have reached Advanced-rank thanks to Rudeus's teaching. In short, it's something to be proud of.
But there's still no 'Saint' prefix in my list of ranks, which makes me a bit annoyed. Maybe I should get serious about training to reach Water Saint before age 15. Can't let my peers leave me behind! Isolde is about to become a Water King, after all!
…
Rudeus's birthday finally arrived.
Just like during my birthday, everyone gave Rudeus the task of standing guard and keeping people occupied while everyone prepared. Now I was given a similar task: to sit and entertain him to stall for time.
"So, you don't know what my gift is either?" Rudeus asked.
I nodded and shrugged. "No clue. I only know what gift I'm giving you. It seems everyone knows we're always whispering secrets to each other, so they put me on the blacklist for this one."
"So, what are you planning to give me, brother?"
Waiting for that exact cue, I took out something I was keeping in the pocket of my cloak. It was a book with a dark brown cover made of some kind of monsterhide, with no title written on it. It looked like something retrieved from a haunted house.
But things that look this mysterious are usually the most precious items. Rudeus probably knew that law of the universe because his eyes lit up instantly.
And I decided to confirm it. "Since I promised to return ten times the value of your gift, I bought this: a Dwarven magic book. I heard it contains records of several Advanced and even Saint-rank Earth magic spells."
"Holy crap!!!!"
Needless to say, this thing was expensive, but I'm rich, so what the hell do I care. Its price was only equal to one year's profit from my entire collection of shops and restaurants.
"Thank you, Acchan! You're the best!"
Rudeus held my book with both hands and lifted it up the way Rafiki lifted Simba. Under the sunset glow shining through the window, the epicness of this scene was boosted by several hundred percent.
"Anyway, give it back." I held out my hand. "You can reenact this later when everyone gives their gifts."
"Ah, right. You don't want to get your wife angry for daring to give a gift before the party, right?" Rudeus placed the book back in my hand with a smirk.
"Yeah."
I have to admit, Rudeus is quite sharp. Although we haven't officially tied the knot, ever since the engagement was established two years ago, Eris has shown quite a bit of control over me. If I accidentally talk to a girl too much or do something improper, she'll remind me. If I repeat it, she uses physical force. Scary as hell. And yeah, I'm the 'scared of my wife' type, okay?
"So, when is it your turn to propose to Sylphie?" I skillfully changed the subject.
Rudeus puffed out his chest with self-satisfaction. "On her 15th birthday. I'll give myself to her as a gift."
Where did this guy learn that cheesy line?
"That long?" I slowly tucked the book back into my pocket. Then, I rested my chin on my hands on the table, intentionally switching my tone to a teasing one. "What if some guy steals her away?"
"I'll kill him," he replied instantly with total determination.
Normally Rudeus isn't the type to use violence to talk, but with that face, he might actually kill someone if they dared touch Sylphie. So they're both the yandere type, huh? Birds of a feather really do flock together. Those two getting together is a perfect match. But thinking about it, their cheesiness levels are also about equal. After all, I know what Sylphie is planning to give Rudeus.
"By the way, it's a pity, isn't it? None of my family could come," Rudeus suddenly sighed.
"Yeah. No one wanted this."
This issue was unavoidable. For some unknown reason, monsters have recently started appearing more frequently and are more bloodthirsty than before. Normally, monsters in the wild stay in their natural habitats, now, they've suddenly started moving in packs, actively attacking in a frenzy. According to rumors in the adventurer circles, they're acting like beasts inside a labyrinth - bloodthirsty and insane.
Still, no one knows the reason. With the situation developing quite poorly across all of Fittoa, guardian knights like Paul must be exhausted and busy. That's the reason why Paul couldn't leave Buena to attend his son's birthday. As for Zenith and the other family members, it seems Rudeus's two younger sisters aren't feeling well, so they had to stay home too.
Though I think even if everyone were healthy, it wouldn't be wise to travel in this unstable environment without someone strong enough to protect them.
Regardless, our Mythical Dancer party has been forbidden from taking quests outside the city walls until things settle down.
"Anyway, it won't be too late to drop by Buena in the summer," I suggested. "We'll have Ghislaine with us then, so it should be safe."
"Yeah." Rudeus nodded.
So both of us looked out the window, watching the sunset begin to fade behind the horizon. The world out there was in chaos, but here it was so peaceful. I wondered what would have happened if I hadn't been born into a noble family.
I really hate being Pilemon's son. No matter how much I cut ties, the fact that I'm his son will stick with me for life. But being born a noble (even an illegitimate one) gave me a pretty good starting point.
If I had been born into a normal peasant family, I might not have lived to this age or had the opportunities for study and training that I have today. And I probably wouldn't have the relationships I have now.
Should I say I'm lucky?
Hmm… These thoughts are meaningless. Maybe Rudeus is right, I should worry about the future rather than looking back at the past like this.
Looking at Rudeus, I didn't know what he was thinking. I guessed he had his own worries. Even as allies, there are clearly still things we haven't fully said about ourselves.
And as the sun finally set, Rudeus seemed to break his train of thought.
I also knew it was time.
"Let's go." I stood up.
Rudeus stood up as well, we decided to play our parts to the end.
…
"Surprise!"
The moment the dining hall door opened, everyone shouted in unison. Rudeus - with acting skills that could probably outperform Masaharu Fukuyama - acted startled.
"What's going on?"
Immediately after, Sylphiette, in a neat and extremely feminine white dress, walked up right in front of Rudeus and handed him a bouquet of Jane Green flowers that matched her hair and Rudeus's eyes. Our friend gave the bouquet to Rudeus with both hands, her face blushing.
"Happy birthday, Rudy."
Now it was Rudeus's turn to turn red, I swear I could hear his heart thumping wildly. This reaction was clearly a case of being struck by lightning-love, he couldn't even act anymore.
"Happy birthday."
Then everyone took turns offering their congratulations. Clapping began to ring out.
"Happy birthday, Rudy," I patted my friend on the back, nudging him forward to accept the flowers.
Rudeus took the flowers, his voice beginning to tremble. "D… did everyone do this for me?" Then he started crying buckets.
Okay, that part was definitely acting. Too over the top, man!
"Eh!?"
Sylphie seemed the most surprised. She was confused for about five seconds before deciding to jump right onto Rudeus, hugging him tight.
"Don't cry! I'm right here, Rudy! Please don't cry."
"Thank you, Sylphie! Thank you, everyone!"
Meanwhile, Eris, who had appeared beside me at some point, clicked her tongue. "Hmph. What an eyesore."
Despite that, she had a very happy smile on her face. Truly the number one wingwoman I trust, she must be delighted to see this scene.
After hugging Sylphie for a while, my friend probably realized he had to set limits and let her go, smiling at everyone. Another round of applause rang out. Although I knew it was for Rudeus again, I was more clapping for my friend's acting talent. So gifted. I have a lot to learn from you, Rudeus.
"Hmph!"
And just like on my birthday, Lord Sauros was the first to speak. He once again declared in his usual loud voice and majestic posture:
"Rudeus! You are now 10 years old! Even as a mage, as a member of the Greyrat house, I order you to prepare for battle alongside me and Atur!"
However, unlike last time, instead of Philip, Eris turned to Rudeus and put her hands on her hips. "Ignore Grandfather. Let's talk about the gifts!"
"ERI! Why did you interrupt your grandfather's declaration!?"
"You promised me no more war talk!"
"But a Greyrat man must become strong!"
"If you mention this again, I'm going to be mad at you!"
And so, Eris successfully defeated the alpha wolf of the Boreas house. Amazing. I almost couldn't help but clap.
"Eri is mad at me…"
"Don't worry, Father, she's just having a momentary fit." Philip was the one who went to comfort him.
"It's all your fault!" Then suddenly Lord Sauros pointed his finger at me. "It's because of how you educated my Eri that she's like this! Before you, she wouldn't talk back to me like this!"
HOW IS THIS MY FAULT NOW!?
…
It took Philip dragging Lord Sauros away for the dining hall to become peaceful again.
"Alright. Ignore Grandfather, let's start the gifting! Alphonse, bring it out!"
Eris snapped her fingers with a dull 'thud' that didn't make much noise. I chuckled and then got smacked in the head.
Alphonse, meanwhile, brought out a wooden staff mounted with a large gem at the top. This was the first time I had seen a real magic staff.
It was a fairly large staff, if compared, it was currently taller than Rudeus, but it would probably look more balanced in a few years. As for the body, it was made of a wrinkled, gnarled wood that looked quite ugly. At the top, it was embedded with a magic stone that looked unreasonably large.
I once saw one half this size selling for fifty gold coins in the Royal Capital. Double the size, so the price must be many times that. Hmm… the Boreas family really went all out this time.
The reason magic stones are so expensive is that they enhance the power of magic - like firing a fireball that does 1 point of damage now does 2 points even using the exact same amount of mana. The enhancement ratio depends on the purity and size of the stone and, well… based on the color of this blue one, it must be quite powerful.
Alright, as a player of 'The Price is Right,' I'll bet this staff is worth two hundred gold coins!
"Wait a minute… is this elder treant wood?" I looked closer at the staff and couldn't help but marvel. "The kind from Millis?"
"As expected of Young Master Atur, your knowledge always surprises others." Alphonse immediately bowed. "That's right, it is exactly a branch from an Elder Treant from the Millis continent."
"You can tell wood types apart?" Rudeus seemed a bit surprised, he probably didn't think I had a hobby in woodworking.
"Yeah, I saw this type of wood once." I answered truthfully. "Back in the Royal Capital, I used to go look at rare materials sometimes."
I only looked, though. I didn't have the money to buy them. Back then, I was broke as hell!
"If it really is Elder Treant wood, I think it suits you well, Rudeus." Seeing Rudeus staring pensively at the staff, I continued. "Because that species evolves from Lesser Treants by absorbing nutrients from fairy springs, giving them quite strong water-manipulation abilities and an A-rank categorization. Because of that, materials from this species' trunk also have the ability to enhance Water-system magic."
Besides being used for magic staves, I heard elves also use this wood to build waterproof houses during the rainy season in the Great Forest. I don't know if that's true because… this stuff is CRAZY EXPENSIVE! It's like building a house out of Agarwood. Pure luxury!
I originally estimated this staff at around 200, didn't I? Since it's made from Elder Treant wood, I'll boldly bump that up to 300!
After hearing my explanation, everyone went silent. It seems Eris - the mastermind behind buying this staff - didn't even know its functions.
"What about the gem?" Rudeus asked next.
"No idea, I'm seeing this type for the first time."
I was never rich enough to touch things like this, heck, I'd never even seen one before.
"Allow me to introduce the gem part." As always, when there's a problem, Alphonse handles it. The butler immediately bowed slightly to ask for permission to speak. "This magic stone was taken from a stray water dragon on the Begaritt continent. This gem is rated as A-rank. And the creator of the entire staff is Chain Procyon, the best staff craftsman belonging to the Royal Palace Mage Association of the Asura Kingdom."
Alright, so I have two more pieces of data.
An A-rank gem from a water dragon. With this size and purity, I'd guess it's around 200 gold coins as I originally said. No problem.
As for the second piece of data… Chain Procyon… if I remember correctly, this guy charges around several dozen gold coins per staff. If it's of this quality, it probably wouldn't be less than 100 gold, right?
So that makes 400 gold already? The Boreas family is truly generous with their gifts, aren't they?
Come to think of it, I also tried to find out the price of my Lion's Tongue. It seems to be valued at around 5,000 gold coins, minimum. Compared to Rudeus's gift, it's still much higher, but it seems it's that high primarily for ceremonial reasons. Like the British Queen's crown - that's the valuation, but no one dares sell or buy it.
Otherwise, I think my sword would also be worth around that much based on materials and utility. I'm just trying to find a way to keep them equal, it's not surprising the Boreas family favors me. I'm their son-in-law, after all. I just worried Rudeus might not be happy.
I'm the type of person who cares about my friends' feelings. Aren't I good?
But based on Rudeus's expression, he didn't seem to be comparing it to my gift at all and truly cherished this staff.
Good. That's my good bro right there.
"And this staff is named 'Aqua Heartia - Arrogant Water Dragon King'."
The moment Alphonse finished, I burst out laughing. "Ha!"
That name sure is priceless!
But seeing as I was being a bit excessive, I immediately covered my mouth. "Sorry, I just… um, was a bit moved by the name."
Everyone looked at me a bit weirdly. Only Rudeus looked at me with understanding eyes. Actually, I should be the one looking at him with sympathy.
But this seemed like a good chance to tease him, as a friend. So I immediately clapped in celebration as he held the staff with both hands.
"Congratulations to the 'Arrogant Water Dragon King' for finding its master. Rudeus, the Arrogant Water Dragon King's master! Please give him an applause!"
Everyone followed suit and offered similar congratulations.
I'm certain Rudeus was cursing me under his breath.
After the applause died down, it was time for me to give my gift to Rudeus. I also pretended to recount the origin and utility of the book. Rudeus, in turn, pretended to be surprised and amazed.
Our little performance was complete.
Finally, there was the gift from Sylphie, which I thought was the gift Rudeus would love most. Oh, it wasn't a physical gift. Instead, several people with musical instruments suddenly appeared in the dining hall.
They began to play. But it wasn't any music the people of this world usually heard. It had a fast, youthful melody, more like the modern style of the 2000s.
Rudeus recognized the song immediately. I bet any otaku would.
It was *Chiisana Koi no Uta*, an other-world remix version, with lyrics adapted into the Human tongue. However, through some miracle, the song's meaning didn't change much. Combined with Sylphie's voice, which was as melodious as spring breezes, it was more than just a love song.
It was a hymn in Rudeus's eyes.
I saw him looking at Sylphie the way he looks at Roxy's panty. I saw his heart beating faster than when Sylphie hugged him earlier.
Embrace it, brother. The best gift is the one Sylphie brought you.
My elf friend had spent several months practicing this song with my suggestion. She originally intended to sing a hymn from Millishion. Luckily, I knew what Rudeus would like and spent some time rearranging it and teaching Sylphie this song.
Perhaps because she trusted me, she practiced a lot, day and night. But whenever Rudeus appeared, she immediately stopped. Keeping it a secret must have been difficult, but everything went smoothly in the end.
The song ended, and Rudeus stood there like a statue.
But it didn't take long before he regained his senses and immediately walked straight to Sylphie.
Rudeus knelt on one knee with a look of total determination and took Sylphie's small hand.
"Sylphie! Please marry me!"
Sylphie clearly hadn't expected this. Her face turned beet red, and even her two pointed ears flapped wildly like bird wings.
"Eh… eh!?" Sylphie stammered. "M… marry? You mean…"
"Yes! I want to take you as my wife! I vow to protect and love you for the rest of my life! Do you accept me as your husband?"
And that was how Rudeus made his proposal five years earlier than planned.
"Ah…! Yes! I do! I will!"
So the two of them hugged, and everyone clapped in celebration again.
Meanwhile, Hilda's eyes started to tear up. Although only a 'godmother in name only,' she truly considered me and Rudeus as her own sons. Suddenly, Hilda went over and hugged both Rudeus and Sylphie at the same time.
"Tomorrow we'll hold a wedding ceremony for you two!" Hilda declared, then turned to Eris. "See that, Eris! You have to be feminine like Sylphie if you want to get married!"
"What are you saying, Mother!? Acchan likes me just as I am!"
Yeah, I like Eris like this better than the gentle type. That's where her character is. But the mother and daughter start 'heartily' discussing it for a while before being stopped by Philip.
Finally, the adults decided to hold a wedding for Rudeus and Sylphie on the day the bride turns 15.
They really should have consulted Paul and Laws' families.
"That is my order!" But since Lord Sauros said that, there was nothing to be done.
…
After the party, I sat with Rudeus to talk for a bit in the library. The moon was quite beautiful today, and the weather was cool - perfect for a heart-to-heart.
Actually, it was more suited for a confession of feelings, but whatever.
"In the end, you went and broke your own plan, didn't you?" I started with a tease.
"Yeah, you clearly had me figured out. Well done." Rudeus said this without any hint of reproach. He must still be very happy.
"As I said, only I understand you best, brother."
"Thanks, brother."
We bumped fists.
"So, after you two get married, you'll move to study at Ranoa University, right?" I asked as I took a sip of wine.
Rudeus did the same, we looked like two brats pretending to be adults. "That was the original plan anyway. Besides, we don't have anything left to teach ourselves. The only way to go further is to head to Ranoa."
It was true, the magic levels of both Rudeus and Sylphie had reached the highest possible threshold. Sylphie hadn't been able to increase her mana for several months, so Rudeus was likely the same. So the only way was to go to Ranoa to progress further.
As for me, I'd likely be staying in Roa for a long time.
"So, in a few years, we'll be going our separate ways, huh?"
Rudeus glanced at me. "You're talking as if we won't see each other again soon. It's at least another 3 years. Or 5 years when I'm 15."
"5 years is just a blink of an eye."
"Are you drunk?"
"This isn't enough to get me drunk."
I was quite sober. After all, I had promised myself never to drink until I was drunk. The last time I got drunk, I accidentally got hugged by Eris and got a wife. Well… it's not like I'm complaining or anything but it's best to always stay sober in every situation.
"It's just that I once had some friends. I thought I'd be able to stay by their side for a long time, but then something happened that separated us all." I sighed. "So I'm just a bit sad thinking about the day our group has to part ways again."
I remembered the day I came to the Royal Capital at age 5 and met Henry and Tristina. It's been over 5 years now, hasn't it? So 5 years isn't actually that long.
And I've been away from Isolde for nearly four years too. She must be almost her 15th birthday by now, I wonder if someone in Shirone has been captivated by her beauty.
Who knows, maybe after we've been apart for a while, by the time I see Rudeus and Sylphie again, they'll have two or three kids already. Although thinking of that made me chuckle, I'd rather be by my friends' side and walk with them through every moment.
But that's a bit of a selfish request, isn't it?
"If that's the case, shouldn't we cherish every moment we still have together even more?" Rudeus raised his wine glass. "Besides, no matter what happens, we'll always be allies. Right, brother?"
"Perhaps so." I raised my glass in response.
Well then, I'll just have to be selfish for the rest of our time together.
…