Hoshino's POV:
"...Bro..ther…?"
I let out an internal sigh of relief, feeling my body slowly ease up.
Thank goodness…
A part of me doubted whether or not I had the right to help my sister, much less pull it off. If I'm being honest, there's still a little part of me that feels ashamed. The thought of playing hero… It disgusts me.
But none of that matters right now.
I glanced at my sister. It felt like my facade of a smile slowly becoming a real one.
It was all worth it. I know it's not much, but seeing my sister lift her face and stop crying made me proud of her. Not of myself -I don't deserve that- but of her. There is nothing harder in the world than giving your faith to someone, especially if that person is me. I am well aware how shitty our relationship is. But despite all of that, my pride as an older brother is still there.
Now, what to do next?
Since she stopped hiding from me, I decided to take a good look at the state my sister was in. She was curled up on the floor like a baby. Her eyes were swollen from the tears, leaving behind smudges of her makeup that she had worked hard to apply in the morning. Her hands and knees were still shaking. But what hurt me the most was that the light in my once loud and obnoxious sister's eyes was… gone– replaced with a look of resigned horror a kid would give waiting to get hit.
It was a look she used to show me all the time. No, not just her, it was a look that I saw in myself for the longest time, too. But now, even as a 15-year-old, that fear was still there, like it had never left.
Seeing her in this state with my own two eyes was… a lot harder than I thought it would be. How was I supposed to just smile and console her here? How was I supposed to maintain the image of a cool, reliable older brother? I felt my eyes sting for a moment, but I quickly put it all away.
No, I decided that I'd do this.
This is my responsibility.
So I can't run, I can't back away.
If I don't do anything here, I can't call myself her older brother.
My sister and I may not seem alike, but no one in the world is more similar to me. Whether I like it or not, my sister will pick up on my habits. So I know for a fact that what my sister wants the most from me, aside from support, is for me to just be myself.
I pushed out a quiet sigh. Enough that it'd get her attention, but not so much that she'd get the wrong idea.
"How long are you going to be layin' on the ground for? You're going to ruin your already bad posture at this rate."
Her eyes widened slightly, and she gave me an expression mixed with relief, confusion, and annoyance.
"C-Can't you just be nice to me for one time in your life?!"
"I was nice to you, but now I'm not. It's cringy being an older brother who fawns over his little sister. If you don't like what you have, get a new one."
"Hmph!"
She pouted at me and looked away.
A wry smile made its way to my face. Maybe I should be just a little nicer to her this one time. If not now, then when?
I suppressed my feelings of protest, already feeling embarrassed over the thought of what I was about to do next.
God, I can't believe I'm actually gonna do this.
But if this is what it takes to make my sister happy, then so be it.
"Ahem."
I loudly cleared my throat to get her attention. She looked at me while cocking her head to the side. I couldn't look at her back.
"?"
"Just gimme a damn moment."
I tried to play it off as a joke, like I usually do, to make it just a tiny bit easier for me.
"You know… You know I'll always love you, right?"
I hung my head down, utterly embarrassed. Admitting to your sibling that you actually love them is really hard. This is why it's so much easier to show it while joking around.
A stale silence grew between us.
I expected her to make fun of me or something. But after waiting a little while longer… nothing happened.
Is she okay?
I gradually raised my head. My body froze from what it saw.
Tears overflowed from her eyes. But it wasn't the same sobbing tears she gave earlier. It was a calm, silent cry.
"Wh- what did you just say?"
I looked away from her, my hand scratching the back of my neck.
"Uhh, I said I love you?"
My sister's eyes wavered as she took a step closer to me.
"D- do you… Mean that?"
"I wouldn't be saying it if I didn't mean it. Stop asking me-"
All of a sudden, she came running into my arms, hugging me tightly, and started crying uncontrollably. I could feel her hands shaking around my waist with each breath she took.
"I-It's been so long! You haven't told me that you love me in so long! I've always wanted to hear you say it!"
Those words shattered me, making me fight back the tears that were trying to come out of my eyes, but my pride held them in. It's not that I hated her or anything. Well, there was a point where I did, but I've just been too embarrassed to say it. I can't be the openly loving brother she wants me to be. That's not who I am. And she accepts it most of the time, but this time isn't one of them. Just this one time, I can allow myself to show her how I feel.
I gently hugged her with one hand and patted her head with the other.
"Well, you do annoy the living shit out of me sometimes, and we do fight- a LOT. But no matter what, just remember that at the end of the day, I'll always love you. Even if our parents don't, I will always be with you."
She squeezed me even tighter. I could feel her tears soak through my shirt, but it didn't bother me.
"Do you really mean that?"
"I wouldn't be here right now if I weren't, genius."
She buried her face into my chest and trembled slightly.
"I-I was so scared."
"I know."
"I was scared of being alone."
"I know."
"But.. I didn't want you to leave me. I just didn't know what to do."
"Well, it's okay. I'm here now, right?"
She looked up at me and smiled. It was a smile I haven't seen from her in a long time. No, it was simply stolen. That smile… If she could smile like that a little more, maybe she'd be easier to deal with.
"Thank you. I love you too!"