I lit candles on their graves, which held half of their ashes; the other half had been offered to Tulmin to guide them to the afterlife. I decorated the graves with the snowdrop bulbs I picked this evening—well, technically, Ela picked them for me. They would bloom in early spring, marking the transition from winter to spring. They would be beautiful.
"Mother, I know you're not happy with me. Despite your efforts, I'm marrying a man with raging blond hair and ash-grey eyes. His skin is a rich brown—you'd be pretty surprised. But he's kind. I think I can make do with him."
I dug another hole and placed another snowdrop bulb into the ground.
"And Father, tell Mother not to be too angry. I won't give birth to his children. I've taken measures for that. Even if I conceive, I will… do what has to be done."
I swallowed, the rising bile burning my throat.
"And Brother, how are you? Are you with Misty? Tell her I miss her so much. There's never a day that goes by when I don't miss you two."
I planted another two bulbs.
My brother was ten years older than me. When I was just ten, he was already engaged to Misty— a beautiful commoner girl with curly black hair and dark eyes. She was a year younger than him and had a warm, joyful soul. She grew close to me quickly. I followed her everywhere with Salime. We were called the mama duck and her two ducklings.
One time, we followed her to her village near the southern border. That was when everything changed. It was tragic. She died protecting us. And my brother died trying to protect her.
The details were blurred, as if my brain had decided to shut down the memory entirely. Even Salime couldn't remember what happened. All I recall is meeting another little boy—but it felt like a fever dream. His face was blurred, his voice distorted.
I shook my head. It was a long time ago.
Misty was buried in Ferne graveyard. Her parents refused to have her buried in the royal one. I would visit her too, before I left.
I dug the final hole for the last snowdrop bulb, placed it inside, and covered it with dirt.
I hoped these beautiful flowers would keep them company in my absence.
A soft rustling sounded behind me. When I turned, I saw Martha. I stood, and she handed me a fur coat.
"It's cold," she said quietly. She looked exhausted, as though she hadn't slept in days.
"He will be here tomorrow—to get married in front of Armie," I told her.
I watched her face carefully. Her expression shifted for a split second before she managed a smile.
"I heard." She helped me slip into the coat she brought. Her fingers moved quickly, fastening the buttons with a practiced ease.
"I promised your mother I would take good care of you in her absence. It seems I have failed," she murmured, sadness softening her voice.
"It wasn't your fault."
I held her hands. They were wrinkled and soft with age. These hands once fed me, bathed me, dressed me. She had been my mother's nanny, then my brother's, and finally mine. Her whole life had been spent caring for us. I was truly grateful.
She sighed and gently cupped my face.
"Please be happy, my little angel," she whispered.
---
The next morning came sooner than I expected. I woke early and put on my mother's wedding dress. I had sent it to the seamstress yesterday, and she had fixed it beautifully. The dress was white, adorned with golden thread, with flying dragon patterns embroidered along the hem. I chose gold jewelry to complete the look.
My hair was pinned into an updo and secured with the Chang'an-style hair ornament Jiao had brought me.
I decided to go to the gates to welcome my soon-to-be husband.
People gathered on both sides of the gates, anxious and whispering among themselves, waiting to see the emperor of Selon.
Then he appeared.
He rode into the capital on a fine white horse, wearing a red turban and a fur coat. He looked majestic—otherworldly. The gasps around me confirmed I wasn't the only one who thought so.
"He's breathtaking," Ela whispered beside me.
He truly was. I nodded. His presence radiated sheer power and leadership. He was born to be an emperor.
He dismounted, handed his horse to a nearby soldier, and walked toward me with a smile. His strides were powerful, deliberate.
"My empress."
He took my hand and lifted it slowly, planting a kiss upon it.
Everyone fell silent. No one expected this.
Neither did I.
Then someone dared to break the silence.
"Our queen will not marry someone of crude blood!" someone shouted.
"She won't!" another echoed.
The elders.
I'd forgotten about them—and they had the audacity to cause trouble now. They pushed their way forward.
"My queen, please retract your decision to marry this damn southerner!" one yelled.
"The dragon blood is pure and must remain pure!" another added.
I glanced at Arvid to see how he would react, but he only smirked—amused, like he was watching a play.
I felt my stomach drop in embarrassment.
I walked toward the elders and raised my hand. They fell silent—for once.
"The emperor of Selon has already signed the peace treaty. They will not touch Draga for as long as it exists, and they will protect it if it is threatened. All I see is a good deal. I'm sure you're not intellectually disabled enough to fail to understand that."
"If the king were alive, he wouldn't allow this!" one shouted.
"He would have gone to war!" another added.
"This is what we get for putting a weak woman on the throne!" another barked.
Silence fell.
They had crossed the line.
My blood boiled.