The public stream was in full frenzy. Millions of viewers across Teyvat were still choking with laughter after watching Xiangling roast the Raiden Shogun on culinary incompetence.
[Chef Mao: My daughter's incredible—teaching the Raiden Shogun to cook!]
[Dongsheng: Shame it wasn't a bit more risqué. Hahaha!]
[Liyue LSP No.1: What risqué? That pure, innocent type hits different!]
[Xu Liushi: Straight to jail for you. Criminal behavior!]
[Fengyan: Open the door! Millelith delivering justice!]
[Cecilius: Hard to believe—the cold, dignified Shogun from the legends… can't even cook?]
[Sara: Tell me about it. I always thought gods were perfect… but apparently the divine can't handle a frying pan.]
[A-Sheng: For Lord Morax—who's practically the Stove God—cooking is like breathing!]
[Sister Gotlinde: No way there are gods who can't cook!]
[Dehya: Don't lump Nahida in with that! Her cookbook collection is probably the largest in the world!]
[Mirror Maiden: Making Her Majesty Tsaritsa cook would be blasphemy!]
[Liyue LSP No.2: Forget cooking—if the Shogun ordered me to lick her boots, I'd happily—]
[Stone: HOW MANY peaches did you eat today?!]
[Fast-Blade Chen: Just admit you're a tourist from Liyue!]
[Hoffmann: But honestly—don't you feel this video is loaded with… satire?]
[Ninglu: Definitely. The Shogun's arrogance, refusing to learn—]
[Lana: It's basically criticizing her inability to govern or empathize. All wrapped in cooking jokes.]
[Kurisu: Ugh… don't remind me. Doing business in Inazuma is hell right now.]
[Kaida Ryoma: Shogunate taxes are killing us! The Vision Hunt was just the spark—people were already on edge!]
[A-Kuan: Yeah… this meme suddenly feels a lot less funny.]
[Yavana: As they say—"Comedy at its peak is tragedy in disguise."]
As laughter faded, a deeper realization washed across the nations.
Even the VIP chat quieted.
[Eula: Seeing it this way… the Shogun is far too authoritarian.]
[Rosaria: No wonder Inazuma's suffering.]
[Ayaka: …The Vision Hunt Decree has widened the country's divisions.]
[Barbara: Lord Barbatos has never abandoned us—that's why Mondstadt stays free!]
[Venti: Eh—well… about that…]
[Zhongli: Ahem. That may not be a logically sound proposition.]
[Lumine: Finally—someone says it.]
[Paimon: Exactly!]
[Madame Ping: Having Xiangling instruct the Shogun was a symbol… quite the clever message.]
[Xiangling: Master Ping, please stop! I'm so embarrassed!]
[Cloud Retainer: Much can the God of Thunder learn from the Lord of Geo—regarding governance.]
[Yanfei: To expose the Shogun's flaws like this, yet wrapped in a playful cooking skit… brilliant satire, really.]
[Collei: Aha! This must be the Dendro Archon's test! She truly sees everything!]
[The Mishearing Maniac: …Dendro Archon??? ∑(O_O;)]
[Collei: N-NO! Slip of the tongue! Forget I said anything!]
[Kokomi: I hope the Shogun reflects upon this… and ends the Vision Hunt Decree.]
[Gorou: Yes! May she finally wake up!]
[Arataki Itto: Hear that, Sara?! The Vision Hunt is garbage! Give me back my Vision and maybe I'll forgive you!]
[Kujou Sara: SHUT UP!!! (table explodes)]
Grand Narukami Shrine
Yae Miko sat elegantly on the shrine steps, tails swaying, chin propped on her hand, a wicked smile tugging at her lips.
She tapped her screen and typed:
@Raiden Shogun
"See, Ei dear? Everyone's criticizing you now."
She'd barely finished typing when—
BOOOOOOM!!!
A rift split open behind her, magatama spinning like a three-bladed saw.
A forty-meter sword of pure lightning came swinging straight down toward her skull.
Yae Miko: "Σ(っOДO;)っ—EH?!"
"THAT IDIOT EI… SHE REALLY CAME TO CUT ME?!"
She leapt aside in a blur of pink light as a thunderclap split the mountaintop.
Meanwhile, the livestream SEGUE'd smoothly into the dreaded quiz round.
[Ding! Question: What is Xiangling's nickname?]
Master Chef
B. Weapon Queen
C. Stove God
D. Flavors of the Common Folk
[Paimon: Ugh! Not the cursed quiz again!]
[Sayu: I refuse!! I'm done with punishments!]
[Lumine: Does Xiangling even have a nickname?]
[Xingqiu: Weapon Queen can be eliminated for sure.]
[Mona: Obviously! Nobody would pick that.]
[Bennett: Stove God doesn't sound right either…]
[Sucrose: I heard in the public stream that "Stove God" refers to Lord Morax. (pushes glasses nervously)]
[Kazuha: That leaves two—Master Chef… or Flavors of the Common Folk.]
[Arataki Itto: Easy! Master Chef!]
[Keqing: She's the head chef of Wanmin Restaurant. But the name 'Flavors of the Common Folk' suits her personality more.]
[Arataki Itto: Fine! Then I'll pick that!]
[Paimon: You changed sides in three seconds!]
[Arataki Itto: Hah! Who needs consistency? This great Arataki Itto chooses whatever he wants!]
[Paimon: I swear, I'm giving you the ugliest nickname in history!]
[Arataki Itto: DO IT! Say it to my FACE in Inazuma! BLEH~]
[Kuki Shinobu: Boss. Stop embarrassing us. (starts beating him off-screen)]
[Kuki Shinobu: My deepest apologies, everyone… (bows deeply)]
◇ I'll be dropping one bonus chapters for every 10 reviews. comment
◇ One bonus chapter will be released for every 100 Power Stones.
◇ You can read 50 chapter ahead on P@treon if you're interested: patreon.com/Mona_studios