Chapter 22— Breaking Point
Lyra's POV
The next morning, I wake up to sunlight spilling across my face, but it doesn't feel like warmth. It feels heavy, like the world is pressing down on me.
I don't move at first. My chest feels tight, like I can't inhale enough air. The pillow smells faintly of lavender, but it does nothing to soften the ache in my bones.
Mom knocks on my door softly. "Lyra? Breakfast is ready."
I groan, forcing myself to sit up. "I'm not hungry."
She pauses outside the door, then sighs. "Lyra… please. Can we talk?"
I ignore her. I pull the blanket over my head, pretending she isn't there. I know she's waiting, watching, giving me that quiet patience she always has. But patience only makes the walls grow higher.
After a while, the knocking comes again, firmer this time. "Lyra, I'm not asking anymore. I need you to talk to me."
Something in her voice cracks through the numbness I've built around myself. I sit up, knees drawn to my chest, the blanket slipping from my shoulders. "I'm fine," I whisper, barely loud enough for her to hear.
"No. You're not fine. I can see it in your eyes, Lyra. I can see it in the way you barely touch your food, the way you've been shutting your phone off, ignoring everyone… even me.You promised me you would'nt do that anymore"
I press my face into my hands, trying to swallow back the tears. I've been holding them in for days — weeks, even — pretending I'm okay while the betrayal keeps replaying in my mind, looping until I can't think straight.
"You have to tell me what's wrong," she continues, softer now, but insistent. "I can't help you if you don't let me."
The walls finally crumble. I can't stop it. The tears spill down, burning my cheeks. My hands shake as I pull my knees tighter to my chest. "I… I don't know how to… how to fix it," I sob. "Everything's broken!"
Mom sits beside me on the bed, her hand warm against my arm. "Slowly, Lyra. Just tell me what happened."
I shake my head violently. "It's… it's them. All of them. Evan, Soraya, Saphira, Aveline… even Cassian. They… they lied to me. They… they… it was all a game."
Her hand squeezes mine. "What game?"
I take a shaky breath, letting the words tumble out. "The last… four years… they were… it was a bet. To see if they could… replace someone. Replace Elaine.Evan's ex" My voice cracks. "They added me to the group… just as a backup. I… I don't know why they didn't tell me, but when I found out… I… I can't. I can't even… I can't believe I trusted them."
Mom pulls me close, holding me as if she could absorb the pain from my body. "Oh, my baby," she murmurs. "I'm so sorry. No one should ever make you feel like that."
"I just… I loved them," I whisper into her shoulder. "I loved Evan. I… I trusted them. And now… now everything hurts. Everything feels wrong."
She strokes my hair, gently rocking me. "I know, honey. I know it does. And it's okay to cry. It's okay to hurt. You're allowed to feel this. But you don't have to go through it alone."
I bury my face into her shoulder, shaking harder now, letting the weight of the past days, the past years, fall away in sobs. For the first time since Saint Valley, I don't have to pretend. For the first time, I can just be broken, and someone will hold me anyway.
"I'm scared, Mom," I whisper, muffled in her shirt. "I don't know if I can ever trust anyone again. I… I don't even know if I can forgive them. Or him."
She kisses the top of my head, pulling me a little closer. "It's okay. You don't have to make any decisions right now. Just take it one moment at a time. You're strong, Lyra. Stronger than anyone knows. And I'll be here every step of the way."
I nod into her shoulder, letting the sobs shake me, letting myself fall apart completely for the first time in years.
After a while, my breathing slows, though my chest still feels tight. I wipe at my face, sniffling. "I… I feel so small."
"You're not small," she says firmly. "You're brave. You've survived so much. And you'll survive this too. But right now, it's okay to just feel. Let it out. Don't fight it anymore."
I nod again. The tears have slowed, but they haven't gone. I don't know if they ever will.
She holds me a little longer, letting me rest against her. Outside, the faint sounds of Lumera — the city moving, life going on — feel distant and muted. I feel… empty, yes, but also a little lighter.
For the first time since I left Saint Valley, I realize that maybe breaking down isn't the end. Maybe it's the beginning.