Or not because two days later… I still had zero plans.
ZERO.
ZILCH.
My brain was as dry as the village farmland.
Because guess what? EVERYTHING WAS CLOSED.
Mana stone mines? Closed.
Farms? Closed.
Sugarcane fields? Nonexistent.
Potatoes? Extinct.
Ocean? EMPTY. FISH-LESS. LIKE A VEGETARIAN SEA.
"What kind of territory," I demanded to Coffi as I paced my room, "has an OCEAN but NO FISH?!"
She shrugged helplessly. "Maybe they… swam away, milady?"
"Oh yes, Coffi, of course! They packed their little fish suitcases and LEFT because our taxes were too high!"
My guard, Henry, passing by the door, muttered, "Honestly… plausible."
I slapped my palms on the table dramatically.
"This place is cursed. It HAS to be cursed. I am a modern educated woman—I multitask, I watch YouTube tutorials, I binge documentaries—and yet I can't fix one dying territory?!"
The two looked at each other like I have two heads, maybe they thought I was crazy-talking again. But who cares. This body belongs to me now…
So I went to Father's library.
Read the kingdom's history.
And guess what I found?
Magic. Mana circle. And. Dark magic. Everywhere.
Like a buy-one-get-one deal.
"Oh look, a page about prosperity—nope, dead. Oh look, a harvest festival—nope, curse. Oh look, a trade agreement—nope, demons."
By the time I closed the book, my conclusion was simple:
"This town didn't die because of bad economy," I said, rubbing my temples. "It died because someone got hex-happy."
Coffi gasped. "Hex-happy?!"
"I stand by my words."
So after two days of THINKING—
(Which should earn me a medal)
I marched to my father with all the confidence of a main character who knows absolutely nothing but still makes decisions.
"Father," I announced. "I'm going to the border where the mines and monsters are."
He stared at me like I'd licked a wall.
"No."
"Why?"
"Because you're my daughter."
"That's not a reason."
"It is absolutely a reason!"
He forbade me.
Lectured me.
Sighed dramatically, because apparently THAT'S genetic.
Then he left for the neighboring territory to borrow gold.
…And the moment he was out the door, Coffi and the guards found me climbing the back wall of the mansion like a drunken raccoon with all my might.
"Milady—MILADY WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" Coffi shrieked.
"Adventure!" I yelled, dropping to the other side with all the grace of a sack of rice.
Henry and Joff, the two guards, were losing their minds.
"Lady Seraphine, your father will KILL us!"
"Then walk faster so he won't catch us!"
"ARE YOU INSANE?!"
"Yes! Now mount the horses!"
Yes, we did while the guards were talking behind my back about how reckless I am and that we were about to be executed by my own father.
But we spent the WHOLE day riding toward the boundary.
And by riding, I mean being spiritually tortured.
My butt was SCREAMING.
The saddle was wooden.
The road was uneven.
The wind kept blowing dust directly into my mouth like nature personally hated me.
The bread we brought?
HARDER than before.
I swear I chipped a tooth.
By the time we reached the mines, the sun was setting in that dramatic fantasy way—
All orange and gold—
As if to say, "Look! A perfect moment for danger!"
The mine entrance was…
Covered. Completely.
Massive boulders.
Collapsing debris.
Broken wooden struts.
I heard a wolf howling or maybe a monster, I don't know. I don't care. Maybe I did.
Henry whistled low. "This didn't happen naturally."
Joff squinted. "Looks like someone sealed it."
"No shit," I murmured, climbing off the carriage like a granny. "But WHY—"
Then I saw it.
A small wooden statue.
Carved crudely.
Placed neatly on the ground.
Covered in dried blood.
Coffi made a noise like a dying tea kettle.
"Mi—Milady… that's… that's—"
"A curse marker," Henry finished, stepping back with his hand on his sword.
"A BLOOD curse marker," Joff whispered.
I grinned.
Actually grinned.
"W-Why are you smiling, milady?" Coffi whispered, horrified.
I crouched to look at the statue, brushing dirt off dramatically.
"Oh Coffi… Henry… Joff…"
I smirked.
"This?" I tapped the bloody little statue like it was a discount item at a flea market. "This is called PLOT."
Henry gulped. "P-Plot?"
"Yes," I said, standing tall like the unhinged heroine I was. "This, my dear friends, is the turning point. The clue. The twist. The reason NOTHING in this stupid territory works."
Coffi tugged my sleeve. "Milady… why are you excited?"
"Because, Coffi…"
I pointed at the mine entrance like some kind of deranged prophet.
"…I think I just found the reason this land died."
"…Which is?" Henry asked.
I spread my arms wide.
"A CURSE!"
They all stared at me. "NO!" They grumbled in unison.
I beamed. "Oh yes," I said. "It's curse-breaking time."
So I took the statue…
"Milady, why did you take that curse statue?" Coffi asked in a squeak so high it could summon bats.
I lifted the bloody little figurine between two fingers like it was a defective action figure from a bargain bin.
"Well why the hell NOT, Coffi?" I deadpanned. "If this creepy little thing killed our territory, then guess what? I'm about to smash it like cheap piñata."
Henry nearly dropped his sword.
"Milady—MILADY—put that down!"
"No."
I clutched it closer to my chest just to watch him panic.
"You are not supposed to touch cursed objects!" he shrieked. "Or even be NEAR them! The curse could transfer to you!"
"Yeah, but—plot twist, Henry—" I waved the statue in his face. "That doesn't count on me."
He stared at me like I told him I'm the goddess of chaos.
"What do you mean it doesn't count?" Joff croaked.
"Well," I gave them an innocent expression that was absolutely not innocent, "magic doesn't work on me."
All three froze.
Like I'd just told them Santa wasn't real.
Coffi blinked rapidly. "Magic… doesn't… work… on you?"
I shrugged. "Yep."
"That's impossible," Henry breathed. "Magic reacts to everyone. Everyone in this realm is born with a mana circle—it's the foundation of life!"
"Yeah, well, apparently I was built differently."
I smirked.
Henry rubbed his eyes. "Milady, mana is what allows you to cast spells, resist curses, sense danger—"
"And I can do NONE of that," I said proudly. "Zero. Zilch. Nada."
Joff frowned. "But since birth Lady Seraphine's mana was… very low."
"Try nonexistent," I said.
Coffi whispered, "But milady… you're a noble lady. You're supposed to be blessed by the kingdom's lineage—"
I leaned close to her.
"Girl… I read the library books. I'm as blessed as a moldy potato."
Henry exhaled sharply. "Then you should be MORE vulnerable to the curse! Not immune to it!"
"Well," I said, lifting the statue again, "clearly the universe didn't get the memo."
I pushed the statue toward them experimentally.
All three immediately backed up like I was brandishing a nuke.