Chapter 5
When Denial meets Desire
Alvin's pov
A week had passed since my last meeting with the Parker's. Daniella and I had plans to meet up after school at one of our favorite food stands. Everything was perfect until a cool breeze that carried that scent graced my nostrils. I tried so hard not to pay attention to it but that scent couldn't be ignored, I turned around and to no surprise it was him… Brian. He walked up to us and I could swear my face turned red from all that anger I had boiling in me… he had that same grin, and this time it was much worse than before.
Daniella and Brian quickly hit it off with different conversations, it was as though they were destined lovers who finally found each other because tell me why Daniella is all over him, fully aware that I'm sitting right next to them. And Brian? He didn't even flinch. I tried hard to stay out of their conversation until Brian made mention of looking for a school to transfer to and Daniella went ahead and invited him to ours. Before I could fathom a thing, two words escaped my mouth "hell no", words I'd wish would have stayed as an intrusive thought . I'm not sure what was more painful Brian's smirk or the way Daniella kept encouraging it like it was some kind of charity event. The guy walks around with that lazy grin, like the universe itself owes him applause for existing. And somehow, he's got everyone fooled. Everyone except me.
"Alvin, what are you implying?" Brian said, leaning back like he was posing for a cologne ad the kind where the model doesn't need to speak because his jawline already signed the contract.
I clenched my jaw. "I'm just saying," I started, trying to sound casual but probably coming off like a boiling kettle, "he might find Emerald high a little too... ordinary." Brian chuckled, low and smooth, the kind of laugh that could make even your insecurities feel seen. "Ordinary's not a problem for me. I like surprises."
Oh, I bet you do. Daniella looked between us, clearly sensing the weird electricity forming at the table the kind that makes popcorn moments feel like bomb countdowns. "Okay, okay," she said with a laugh that tried to cut through the tension. "You two sound like you're about to arm-wrestle over cafeteria rights."
Brian grinned wider. "I mean, I wouldn't mind a little competition." He glanced at me again, doing that triangle move eyes, lips, eyes and my stomach twisted like it was trying to form Morse code for "get me out of here." I rolled my eyes. "Relax, James Bond, we're here for tacos, not territory."
Daniella snorted, nearly spilling her drink. "Wait, did you just call him James Bond?"
Brian laughed too, and that made it worse. He leaned forward slightly, elbows on the table, smirk softening just enough to look genuine. "You've got jokes, Alvin. I like that."
There it was again that tone. That challenge.
I forced a smile that probably looked like I was trying to chew a lemon. "Glad to entertain."
The silence after that wasn't empty. It was loaded like we both knew there was a storm coming, we just hadn't decided who'd get soaked first. Daniella kept talking about school events, the food truck, the weather, anything to break it but the truth? My mind wasn't there. It was locked on Brian. The way he looked at me like he knew something I didn't. Like he'd already read the next few chapters of a book I hadn't even realized I was in. And maybe, just maybe, I wasn't ready for where this story was headed.
Then his phone buzzed. He glanced at it, then stood up, tossing his food wrapper into the bin with perfect aim of course. "Guess I'll see you around, Daniella. Alvin." His eyes lingered on me just a beat too long. "Don't miss me too much."
I scoffed, but my pulse betrayed me, beating way too fast for someone who claimed not to care.
As he walked away, Daniella elbowed me with a grin. "Sooo... you two have history, huh?"
"Yeah," I said, staring at his retreating figure. "And unfortunately, I think it just got a sequel."We watched Brian walk away, his stupidly confident stride making it look like he owned the sidewalk too. Daniella's grin didn't fade if anything, it got wider, like she'd just stumbled into the pilot episode of some romantic drama and decided she was the audience and the director.
"So…" she started, dragging out the word like it had its own echo. "You wanna explain what that was?"
"What… what was?" I asked, stuffing a fry in my mouth for distraction.
She raised an eyebrow. "Don't play dumb. That" she waved her hands dramatically toward the direction Brian had disappeared, "that entire eye-contact showdown! You two looked like you were about to either fight or"
"Don't finish that sentence," I cut in quickly.
She laughed so loud people turned to stare. "Oh my god, you're blushing!"
"I'm not I'm literally sunburned, Daniella. The sun is right there!"
"Uh-huh. Sure. Sunburned from your feelings, maybe?"
I groaned, dragging my hand down my face. "Can we not psychoanalyze me over tacos?"
But the truth was, even as I said it, I couldn't shake the image of Brian's smirk. It was like it got tattooed on the inside of my brain mocking, knowing, magnetic in the most irritating way possible.
Why did he have to show up now? Why here, of all places? After a whole week of me finally managing not to think about him or what happened that night after Dad's meeting and boom, there he is, smelling like expensive cologne and bad decisions.
Daniella nudged me again, softer this time. "Hey… you good?"
I sighed, leaning back against the bench. "Yeah. Just... didn't expect to see him again. That's all."
She studied me for a second her usual teasing fading into genuine curiosity. "You two really do have some kind of history, huh?"
I stared down at my half-eaten taco. "Something like that. Let's just say… we didn't exactly end things on good terms."
"End what?" she asked, leaning in.
Before I could answer, my phone buzzed. One new message. No name, just a number I didn't save but I didn't have to. I knew who it was.
Brian: "You still owe me a proper conversation. Don't run this time."
My stomach flipped.
Daniella noticed my expression instantly. "Who's that?"
I locked my screen. "Nobody."
She smirked. "Liar."
I forced a smile and grabbed my drink, trying to play it off. "Come on, we're gonna be late for class."
We started walking back toward school, her chattering beside me about how she was definitely Team Fantasy over Team Action, but my brain had completely checked out. Because no matter how fast I walked, one thought kept following me
Brian wasn't done with me.
And if I was being honest… I wasn't sure I was done with him either.
I thought if I just ignored the text, it'd go away.
Spoiler: it didn't.
By the time the final class was over, my brain had rewritten Brian's message a hundred different ways from "You still owe me a proper conversation" to "You still owe me your soul," because, obviously, he'd sell it if he could.
Daniella had a club meeting, so I told her I'd catch up later. Which was code for I need to hide before Brian decides to materialize out of nowhere like some smug demon.
But of course, the moment I stepped outside, there he was. Leaning against the hood of his car like he was auditioning for a perfume ad.
Same stupidly confident grin. Same too-cool jacket. Same everything that made my stomach tumble. "Missed me?" he said.
"Not even slightly," I shot back. "You're blocking the exit."
He chuckled low, amused, like he could hear the lie in my voice. "You got my text."
"I also get spam emails about cryptocurrency. Doesn't mean I respond to those either."
He pushed off the car and walked toward me, slow enough that I could've left if I wanted to.
I didn't.
"You still run your mouth when you're nervous," he said.
"I'm not" I shot back
He raised an eyebrow.
"Okay, maybe a little."
We stood there for a moment the after-school noise fading, the parking lot mostly empty now. He was close enough that I could smell that same expensive cologne from before the one that made it hard to think straight.
"You said you wanted to talk," I finally said. "So talk."
He tilted his head. "You sure you wanna do this here?"
"I'm not going anywhere private with you."
"Good," he said with that half-smirk again. "Because you'd probably run."
"I will run?."
He took another step closer. "No, you won't."
I hated that he was right. I hated that he knew it.
And worse I hated that I wanted to know what would happen if I didn't.
"Brian," I warned.
"Relax," he said, softer this time. "I just wanted to see you. You disappeared."
"I had a good reason," I muttered.
"Yeah? Because last time I checked, you were the one who"
"Don't," I said quickly. "Don't bring that up."
His expression shifted less cocky now, more serious. "You think pretending it didn't happen makes it easier?"
"It makes it over."
He smiled not teasing this time, but almost sad. "You don't actually believe that."
For a second, the air between us felt too thick.
He brushed a bit of hair from my forehead gentle, annoyingly so. My heart did a full somersault.
I stepped back like his touch burned. "Don't."
"Still pretending, huh?" he said quietly.
"I'm not pretending"
He leaned in, close enough that his breath brushed my cheek. "Then tell me you don't feel anything."
I opened my mouth, ready to say exactly that to end it, to walk away but the words didn't come out. My throat felt tight, and my brain was short-circuiting somewhere between annoyance and want.
Brian smirked again victorious, infuriating.
"Didn't think so," he said, before stepping back.
And just like that, the moment broke. He turned toward his car, like this was all just some casual check-in instead of emotional warfare.
"See you around, Alvin," he said, climbing in.
I stood there, heart hammering, pretending like my legs weren't jelly. Because no matter how hard I tried to convince myself it was nothing just tension, I knew better.
I watched Brian's car pull away, the headlights cutting through the dusk like twin blades. For a moment, I stood there rooted, hollow as the sound of the engine faded into the distance. Then silence. Heavy. Accusing.
It's ridiculous, I told myself. Just a conversation. Just a look. But my pulse was still hammering, betraying me. It shouldn't have meant anything. It can't.
God, why can't I make it stop? I pressed a hand against my chest like I could force the feeling down, crush it under logic, under duty. Daniella!. I have Daniella. I love her don't I? I must. She's good, constant, everything solid and right in a life that's been mapped out for me since the beginning. Our future is decided, our families content, the path laid straight.
So why do I feel like I've already stepped off it?
Brian's laugh still lingers in my ears, uninvited. That easy charm of his it's infuriating. The way he looks at people, like he's dissecting them and understanding things they don't even want to say. When he looked at me… it was like he saw something I've been trying to bury for years.
Something I didn't even have a name for until now. I should hate that. I should run from it. But instead, I'm standing here wishing I'd said something anything to make him stay a little longer.
It's wrong. I know it's wrong. This is the kind of thing that destroys people from the inside out, that eats at what's left of your sanity until you start to wonder which part of you was real before all this began. And yet, I can't shake it that pull. That unfamiliar tightening in my chest that feels too much like longing to be ignored. It's madness. Dangerous. But buried somewhere inside that danger is… calm. Safety, even.
What does that say about me?
The night air feels colder now. My hands won't stop trembling, and I can't tell if it's fear or something far worse desire wrapped in guilt, guilt wrapped in curiosity.
Whatever it is, it's growing.
And I don't know whether I want it to stop… or to see how far it'll take me before everything I know falls apart.
Brian's Pov
The rearview mirror caught Alvin still standing ther frozen, small against the fading light. For a second, I almost hit the brakes. Almost. But I didn't.
Instead, I kept driving, jaw tight, fingers drumming against the steering wheel like I could tap away the heaviness pressing on my chest. The silence in the car felt too loud. I rolled down the window just to hear something the wind, the road, anything but the echo of his voice.
"See you around, Alvin."
Simple words. Too simple for the mess they left behind.
I shouldn't care. He's engaged, for God's sake. To Daniella of all people perfect, untouchable Daniella. The kind of woman men like Alvin are supposed to love. The kind of woman men like me are supposed to stay away from.
But the look on his face when I said goodbye… I've seen fear before, but not like that. Not the kind that hides behind politeness and trembling restraint. It's the same kind I've seen in mirrors the kind that means don't ask me to explain this, I don't understand it myself.
I don't know what this is.
I don't know what I'm doing.
He's not the kind of man I chase. Hell, I don't chase anyone. I've spent years keeping distance, building walls, staying in control. Yet one conversation with him one brush of silence between words and it feels like something in me cracked.
I keep replaying the moment the way his eyes flickered when I smiled. It wasn't attraction, not exactly. It was something stranger, something raw. Like he was fighting gravity and losing.
And the truth? So was I.
I should let it die here, before it turns into something we can't walk away from. But even as the road stretches out ahead, all I can think about is the weight of what hung between us that unspoken thing neither of us dared to name.
It shouldn't mean anything. It can't.
But I can still feel it a flicker under my skin, a pulse that doesn't belong to me anymore.
And the worst part?
I think he felt it too.
That night sleep didn't come easily.
The city outside my window was still alive, humming and distant headlights streaking across the glass, the faint pulse of life carrying on without me . I sat on the edge of my bed, half undressed, a glass of whiskey untouched beside me.
I had told myself i wouldn't think about it. Wouldn't think about him.
But memory is a stubborn thing. It slips in through cracks when you're tired, when the defenses drop. And Alvin's face that careful, frightened look he wore kept surfacing like a ghost that refused to be buried.
I leaned back against the wall, exhaling through his teeth.
I wasn't supposed to feel anything. Not for someone like Alvin the kind of man who plays by the rules, whose world is lined with promises, family expectations, and a woman waiting for him.
But there it was that faint sting under his ribs.
Curiosity, maybe.
Longing, probably.
Trouble, definitely.
I ran a hand through my hair, laughing softly to myself.
"Get a grip," i muttered. "You've been here before. You know where this road leads."
Only this time, it didn't feel like all the others.
This one felt real.
The whiskey burned on the way down, but not enough to drown the thought that maybe just maybe Alvin was thinking of him too.