His stomach let out a loud grumble.
He sighed and covered his face.
"…Forget it. Gotta live somehow."
If he could just make it through the next five years—the duration of the Second Shinobi World War—he'd go into hiding afterward.
Once the Akatsuki was founded, he'd hand leadership over to Yahiko, pocket some money, and retire somewhere peaceful. The Land of Hot Water sounded perfect—after all, it was Jiraiya's favorite "research spot."
As for the poison coursing through his body… he could leave that to Tsunade. When the time came, he'd make peace with her, owe her a favor, and within five years, she'd become the greatest medical ninja in the world. Curing his venom sac would be nothing to her.
He could even wager something with her like the Raikage did in the original story—maybe walk away with her Byakugō Technique if he was lucky.
Sure, his combat power would drop once he removed the poison sac, but by then he'd already be retired. With Nagato around, anyone foolish enough to invade Amegakure would soon "know pain."
As long as Black Zetsu didn't stir up trouble, another twenty years or so and Naruto would be born to end the chaos.
If he could survive until then, the Land of Rain would finally see peace.
A perfect plan.
Five years. Just five years, and he could finally—well—enjoy himself.
He was still lost in this daydream when a Ame ninja landed before him, kneeling on one knee.
"Lord Hanzō, the Konoha forces have crossed the border and are advancing southwest. Please issue your orders."
"I see… give me a moment," Hanzō replied, his tone muffled through the respirator. His mind raced, rapidly sifting through the memories of this body's past.
Then it hit him.
Hanzō's face twitched—his cheek muscles tightening into a twisted grimace.
You've got to be kidding me… this idiot really went and poked every hornet's nest at once?!
"Withdraw our forces from the borders," Hanzō ordered calmly. "No need to hold the lines. We can't stop the Five Great Nations from marching in anyway. There's no point in throwing away lives for nothing."
Yes—his predecessor, the original Hanzō, had simultaneously provoked three of the Great Nations—Fire, Wind, and Earth—while trying to pit them against each other.
Konoha had lost Hashirama and Tobirama but still held the most fertile land.
After ten years of rebuilding from the First Shinobi War, the other nations were once again restless.
By goading three nations at once, Hanzō had intended to drag the entire shinobi world into chaos. Once the Great Nations turned on one another, Amegakure—small but strategically positioned—might just find a narrow path to survival.
It was a daring and utterly insane plan—
to pull the whole world down with him.
Now, this reincarnated Hanzō had inherited not just the man's strength and memories, but also his mess.
"Lord Hanzō, why?" the kneeling Ame ninja protested.
"The Great Nations act arrogantly because they're strong—but how can we, the Hidden Rain Village, bow our heads? Every shinobi here is ready to fight and die for our land!"
"You're too young," Hanzō said, shaking his head. "You don't understand how terrifying the Five Great Nations really are. The Land of Rain simply can't sustain a full-scale war."
He pointed outside at the endless rain.
"Our country is tiny—barely a tenth the size of theirs. Take the Land of Fire for example: their population alone is a hundred times ours, and their economy? Beyond calculation."
"Each of the Five Great Nations has its own advantage.
The Land of Fire is vast and fertile.
The Lands of Wind and Earth are rich in minerals.
The Land of Lightning thrives on mountain herbs and livestock.
The Land of Water is fortified by the sea and abundant in resources."
He gestured toward the downpour beyond the doorway.
"That—" he said, "is their war potential. They can recover from war within a few years. But us? How would we recover from such devastation?"
The young Ame ninja frowned. "But Lord Hanzō, you said before—that's why we must expand our territory and grow stronger! You told us that wars happen because of imbalance, and only by achieving equal strength with the Great Nations could we unite the world and bring peace!"
Hanzō sighed. So this one's still brainwashed by the old me, huh?
"The situation has changed," he said evenly.
"You'll understand in time."
After all, Amegakure wasn't helpless. If the war broke out across the Rain Country's borders, he just needed to stay neutral.
As long as no one attacks Amegakure directly, I'll keep my hands off too. Whoever wants to fight—let them fight each other.
If he recalled all troops inward, his numbers wouldn't be any smaller than the forces the Great Nations were sending in. With his own strength on top of that, he could easily deter them.
Unless all three nations—Fire, Wind, and Earth—suddenly decided to unite against him (which they wouldn't), anyone attacking Rain Country alone would pay dearly.
The Land of Rain was the central battlefield.
The terrain favored them.
Anyone foolish enough to cross into it could expect exploding tags along their routes… and if things got bad, he'd just summon a few giant salamanders to spread some poison around.
Maybe he wouldn't kill them all—but he'd sure make them miserable.
And if one nation pushed too far, the other two would never let that opportunity slip.
Even if they wanted to take Rain Country, it'd have to wait until after the war—and by then, he'd already closed the borders and gone full isolationist. Peaceful and quiet.
Who'd bother fighting him then?
"Lord Hanzō?" the Ame ninja spoke up, noticing his silence.
"Ah, yes. I understand." Hanzō nodded, pretending to ponder.
"Where are the Iwa and Suna forces now?"
"The Iwa forces are stationed at the border. The Suna army hasn't been sighted, but scouts report a large unit approaching the frontier—they'll arrive within a day."
"I see."
"Then here's the new order," Hanzō declared.
"All personnel except scouts and intelligence agents—withdraw. Begin relocating civilians to the eastern region. Clear the battle zone for them."
The Ame ninja hesitated. "But my lord… if they see us retreating, won't they press the attack?"
"It's fine," Hanzō replied lightly. "I'll personally poison the border zones in a few days. If they ignore the warning, next time I'll spray it right in their faces."
He shrugged. "Besides, we don't have much worth fighting over anyway. No resources, no wealth—just a strategic position. But to hold this land, they'd have to defeat the Amegakure first. And I'm still here."
At that exact moment—
Grrrrooowl.
His stomach betrayed him again.
"…Ugh."
The silence that followed was painful.
Hanzō didn't know what to say.
But the Ame ninja's eyes suddenly flared with fanatic devotion.
"I understand now, Lord Hanzō! I'll deliver your command immediately!"
Before Hanzō could react, the man disappeared with a Teleportation Jutsu, leaving him standing there dumbfounded.
"…Understand what? I didn't even say anything yet."
Meanwhile, that Ame ninja was sprinting across the muddy terrain, tears in his eyes.
"Lord Hanzō is so devoted to our people that he neglects even food and rest! How could I ever doubt his resolve? I must relay his will at once!"
Back at base, Hanzō chewed on a soldier pill with a sigh.
"Whatever. Who knows what goes on in that guy's head… probably just another overzealous fanboy."
Still, it wouldn't cause too much trouble.
He just needed time to fully organize his memories and information.
---
A few days later – Border of the Land of Rain
"What's going on? The Ame ninja who were constantly harassing us have all pulled back," muttered Nara Shikaku, commander of the Konoha forces.
Something didn't add up.
"No… something's wrong."
As a member of the Nara Clan, Shikaku was born with sharp intellect. Their family excelled in tactics, politics, and advisory roles.
With the Second Shinobi World War about to erupt, Konoha's high command had already anticipated the strategic importance of the first battle. A decisive early victory would bring immense benefits—morale, resources, logistics, and intimidation.
That's why they had gone all in.
And Shikaku, with his unmatched analytical skill, had been chosen to lead.
So this sudden, uncharacteristic retreat from Hanzō was suspicious—deeply suspicious.
"Hanzō of the Salamander," Shikaku murmured, eyes narrowing. "A powerful, ambitious madman. With his personality, he'd never pass up an opportunity. A retreat like this… could it be a trap?"
"No, that's too obvious. But we've already entered their territory—he should be trying to stop us, not backing off… What's his plan…?"
"It's a dilemma. If it's a trap, we risk heavy losses. But if it's genuine…"
He frowned. "Hanzō isn't someone who uses such transparent tricks. But underestimating him would be suicide."
He rubbed his temples. "Avoiding their lines? Impossible. This route is already the safest we have. Every alternative is filled with traps we've detected beforehand. Changing course now would break formation and hurt morale."
"Defensive stance? No, that's not Hanzō's style either…"
The more powerful the opponent, the greater the variables one had to account for. And against Hanzō, those variables were endless.
After a long silence, Shikaku still had no conclusion.
"Commander! Message from the intelligence division!"
"Let me see."
A black scroll was handed to him. He read through it carefully—and frowned.
"What the…? The Ame ninja aren't confronting us—they're helping civilians evacuate? What's Hanzō up to? This is the same man who imprisoned his own daimyō!
What kind of playacting is this!?"
Another messenger arrived moments later.
"Report! Intel from the border with the Lands of Earth and Wind!"
"The Iwa forces are massing at the frontier—they look ready to invade. The Suna army hasn't deployed in full yet, only a small defensive unit, but reinforcements are on the way."
Shikaku began pacing back and forth. "I can feel it… something's about to happen."
A deafening crack of thunder tore through the sky, followed by a torrential downpour.
"Damn it—this rain will slow our advance again."
Even the brilliant strategist felt a headache coming on. He exhaled slowly, forcing himself to stay calm. As he stared at the relentless storm, a thought sparked in his mind.
Wait… the Suna forces still haven't appeared.
"Quick!" he barked. "Call in Akimichi Torifu!"
Moments later, a burly man strode into the tent. "What's wrong, Shikaku? You sound urgent."
"I think I've figured something out," Shikaku said, pointing at the map spread before them.
"Here—between the Lands of Fire and Wind lies the Land of Rivers. It's a buffer state… but it also borders the Land of Rain. What if Suna's planning something through there?"
Torifu frowned. "Impossible. If they were making a move, our spies in the Land of Rivers would've spotted it immediately."
Shikaku shook his head. "Normally, yes. But what if it's not a large-scale operation? What if it's a small elite squad?"
Torifu stiffened. "An elite assassination unit…? The Suna ninja really dare to go that far?"
Shikaku nodded grimly. "Exactly. A specialized decapitation squad—stealth, infiltration, and high-precision strikes targeting commanders directly."
Torifu's eyes widened, a bead of sweat forming on his temple. "That kind of unit would cost them dearly… and their commander would have to stay well behind the front lines. Even if the assassination succeeded, they'd never escape alive."
Shikaku's tone stayed calm, analytical. "True—but think about the nature of Suna's puppet users. A typical puppeteer controls three or so puppets; the skilled ones can handle even more. But if they infuse those puppets with chakra and preset traps, they can still move for a set duration without their master nearby."
Torifu's expression darkened.
Shikaku continued, "If they hide a few ordinary puppets in advance to draw attention—or even rig them with explosive tags as distractions—it wouldn't be difficult. That would dramatically increase the puppeteers' chances of escaping alive after the hit."
He paused for a moment before adding quietly, "And then there's their strongest weapon—poison. The Sunagakure's toxins are infamous. Once they're used, there's no real defense."
Torifu swallowed. "That's already bad enough. What could possibly worry you more than that?"
Shikaku's face hardened. "If Amegakure coordinates with Sunagakure, the success rate of this plan skyrockets. Imagine this—while Suna's assassins infiltrate, Ame's forces set traps along our advance route or engage us directly. Our defensive squads would be drawn into combat, leaving our command post under-defended. In that case, the assassins could kill the commander and still get out alive."
Torifu was silent for a long while, then finally muttered two words under his breath:
"The Demigod—Hanzō of the Salamander."
Shikaku nodded gravely. "Yes. When one man's strength reaches that level, the entire battlefield changes around him. And right now, it's very possible Amegakure and Sunagakure have formed an alliance."
The constant mental strain was beginning to wear on him, and he rubbed his temples. "Ame's specialty is Water Style. If they allied with Iwagakure, that would've been suicidal—too much elemental disadvantage. But Sunagakure…"
He glanced at the map spread before them. "The desert and the rain—two completely opposite climates. Their fighting style would normally be crippled here, their jutsu weakened by the wet conditions. Which is exactly why allying with Amegakure makes sense. It compensates for their greatest weakness."
Torifu frowned. "Then the Ame's evacuation of civilians…"
"Is just camouflage," Shikaku finished. "A smokescreen. They want us to think they're retreating and laying traps so we don't act rashly. But in truth, they're clearing a route for Sunagakure's withdrawal and covering their movements."
The realization hit them like lightning.
Everything suddenly fit perfectly.
Torifu stared at him in awe. "Shikaku… it's a good thing you're the one commanding this front. If it were anyone else…"
He exhaled sharply. "I understand now. I'll report this immediately to Lord Hokage."
"Good," Shikaku said, nodding. "Also—send the Konoha-ryū sword masters to the Land of Rivers. Preferably from the Moonlight Clan. They're experts in assassination and counter-reconnaissance. If anyone can track down puppeteers and sever their chakra strings mid-battle, it's them."
"Understood."
---
The Next Day — Iwagakure, Tsuchikage's Office
Ōnoki frowned as he read the parchment before him. "Is this information reliable?"
"Yes," the intelligence officer replied. "It was sent yesterday by one of our embedded spies. His cover is secure."
Ōnoki leaned back, humming. "Hmph. As I thought. With the Second Hokage dead, that Sarutobi brat can't hold his ground. They've already crossed the border and then stopped? Hesitant and cautious—no wonder Konoha can't achieve anything decisive."
"What about Sunagakure?"
"No updates yet," said another intelligence officer. "Their communications have gone completely silent. We don't know what's happening there."
Ōnoki chuckled darkly. "Ha! Another one of Konoha's little tricks, no doubt. A 'Please come into the jar' trap—same as the one my sensei and I fell for back in the day. But this time they've teamed up with the Suna, huh? Then those desert fools are in for a rude awakening."
His expression darkened suddenly, thinking of a certain Uchiha from the past. "Have the frontline troops hold their position. No advances. Iwagakure specializes in defense. We lose nothing by waiting. Let's see how long they can hold out. Besides—Kumogakure is just waiting for a chance to strike us in the back."
"Lord Tsuchikage," one of the officers spoke hesitantly, "isn't that a bit too… pessimistic?"
Ōnoki smirked. "Skeptical, not pessimistic. The Second Kazekage, Shamon, was a soft idealist. Always talked about development and cooperation. Even their village's strength is lacking compared to the rest of us.
Konoha may be everyone's current common enemy, and yes, they'll take the heaviest losses, but wars aren't won in a day. Eventually, we'll have to face them, too. And when that happens, a few well-timed trade deals or bribes will make the other nations turn their blades elsewhere. Only a fool would refuse free advantage."
He gestured dismissively. "That's why their information's gone silent. They're hiding troop movements. There's no way the border with the Land of Wind is truly undefended—it's bait, waiting for us to take it."
Ōnoki's smirk widened. "Contact Hanzō of the Salamander. Tell him I have a proposal for him—a trade that will benefit us both."
---
Sunagakure – The Wind Kage's Conference Hall
Inside the meeting room sat Elder Chiyo, Ebizō, and the rest of the Suna's upper council. The air was heavy with tension.
Chiyo spoke first. "As you all know, our Second Kazekage, Lord Shamon, passed away recently. We've sealed the village's borders and cut off all external communications to prevent information leaks."
"The war has already reached us," she continued solemnly. "Our top priority now is to select the Third Kazekage and stabilize the village. We must not give other nations an opening to exploit our weakness. Now then—let's discuss candidates for the Third."
Shamon, the Second Kazekage, had been the architect of Sunagakure's puppet corps—refining and weaponizing puppetry to compensate for their lack of natural resources. He had also expanded the village's influence, following the First Kazekage's development plan and gathering power over the past decade.
With his death, the era of the Second Generation of Kage officially ended.
And so began the age of the Five Third Kage—the new generation that would shape the coming war.
---
Meanwhile — Somewhere in the Land of Rain
After spending days combing through the original Hanzō's memories, the reincarnated Hanzō had finally succumbed to exhaustion.
He turned over in his bed, mumbling faintly in his sleep as the rain continued to fall outside.