Family Breakdown
Chapter 3 - The Lost Joy of Childhood
Days in the village continued to pass, and changes became more and more evident in Rina's life. The family that was once filled with love and laughter was now breaking apart. Her grandfather had remarried, and the atmosphere at home grew unfamiliar. Her grandmother, now living with relatives, often came to visit but each visit carried a silent emptiness that words could not express.
Rina often longed for the old days, when everyone lived together, sharing warmth and happiness under the same roof. But with her grandfather's new wife in the picture, everything changed. A quiet loneliness began to settle inside her, one she never spoke about to anyone. She tried to stay strong, but her heart felt distant from those she once loved.
A Morning of Tension
One bright morning, Rina woke up earlier than usual. The village was alive with its familiar morning rhythm the ringing bell of Pak Kadir's bicycle as he sold fresh fish and vegetables door to door. But that day felt different. The laughter of children outside only made her heart feel heavier.
Sitting quietly by the window, she watched the world beyond. She saw Anita and Mikol talking happily, but she couldn't bring herself to join them. It was as though she now belonged to another world one far from theirs.
Rina (in her heart): "Why do I feel like this? Why does my life feel so empty?"
The leaves swayed gently in the morning breeze, and she felt as if the wind carried her sadness away, scattering it across the sky. Once, she used to play freely under that same sun but now, everything seemed to have changed.
A Heavy Decision
Weeks passed, and the tension at home grew worse. Rina could sense the distance between her mother and her grandfather. They rarely spoke, and when they did, it was often with anger.
One afternoon, while Rina was playing in the yard, she overheard their voices rising from inside the house.
Grandfather Harun (angrily): "You don't understand, Fatimah! I have the right to be happy. I'm tired of our old life!"
Rina's Mother (hurt): "And do you think we your children are happy? You left us just like that!"
Rina froze outside the door, her small hands trembling. Every word cut deep into her heart. She didn't fully understand everything, but she knew something inside their family had broken beyond repair.
She felt helpless too young to fix anything, yet old enough to feel the pain of it all.
A Search for Meaning
One cloudy afternoon, Rina left the house, hoping the quiet roads of the village could bring her some peace. She walked alone, her bare feet brushing the dusty path.
At the village shop, she saw other children laughing and buying snacks, their faces bright with joy. She stood at a distance, watching.
Rina (in her heart): "They all look so happy… but why can't I feel the same? What's wrong with my life?"
She stopped under a large tree by the roadside, lowered her head, and tried to calm her restless mind. But no matter how she tried, the emptiness inside her wouldn't fade. She thought about the cotton candy she once dreamed of sweet, soft, full of color. Now, it felt meaningless, just like every wish she used to have.
Then, she heard footsteps approaching. Turning around, she saw Anita walking toward her, a bright smile lighting up her face.
Anita (cheerfully): "Hey, Rina! Want to come with me to the shop? I'm going to buy candy!"
Rina simply nodded, saying nothing. They walked side by side in silence one full of energy, the other lost in thought.
Rina (in her heart): "What am I even looking for? Maybe I just need to find happiness in the right place… but does it still exist anywhere?"
The Lost Games of Childhood
By evening, the village came alive again with laughter and the sounds of children playing. It reminded Rina of the old days when life was simpler, and every sunset meant another game with friends.
Back in 1985, children loved their traditional games:
There was waw, where they threw long sticks as far as they could, testing their strength and precision. There was layang-layang (kite flying), where they competed to see whose handmade kite crafted from bamboo and paper could soar the highest.
And there was guli, the marble game played in open fields where they dug small holes in the dirt, trying to hit and sink each other's marbles.
That day, Rina stood quietly at the edge of the group, watching the others laugh and play. She wanted to join, but something inside her held her back. She always felt like she didn't belong.
Then Anita noticed her.
Anita (smiling): "Come on, Rina! Let's play marbles! I'll teach you it's fun!"
Rina smiled shyly and accepted a marble from her. She crouched down, her fingers trembling slightly as she tried to aim. The marble rolled, bounced off another, and landed nearby. She giggled a small, fleeting joy she hadn't felt in a long time.
Rina (in her heart): "Maybe… there's still a little happiness left in me. Maybe I can still feel it."
But when the game ended and the laughter faded, the emptiness returned. Though she tried to play, though she smiled with her friends her heart still felt hollow, as if something precious inside her had gone missing long ago.
Years passed, and Rina was now 14. Her life had changed drastically. While her friends continued their studies at school, Rina had to stop attending since the age of 12 to care for her younger siblings. Her parents could no longer manage the large family, and the responsibility fell on her shoulders.
Rina felt disappointed, but she had no choice. Family came first. Every day, after taking care of the house and her siblings, she would help her mother with chores and daily needs. Even though she had to quit school, deep down she still hoped that one day she could return and continue her education.
However, her fate became even heavier when her mother told her that she would soon be married off to an older man. Rina was shocked and heartbroken, but she couldn't oppose her family's decision.
Rina's Mother (softly): "Rina, it's time for you to get married. We can't let you continue like this. You need someone to take care of you."
Rina (sadly): "But Mother, I'm still young. I'm not ready…"
Rina's Mother (gently): "My dear, this is for your own good. He will look after you. Don't worry, we'll always be here to help."
Even though her heart was heavy, Rina could only nod. There was nothing she could do but accept the decision. That was the fate of many young girls back then married off with little to no choice.
Meanwhile, life in the village went on as usual. Children still played in the yards, enjoying the freedom Rina no longer had. They played marbles, waw (a traditional throwing stick game), and kites games full of joyful childhood memories. Rina remembered how she once played kites with her cousins near the fields, feeling happy despite their hardships.
Rina (in her heart): "I used to love flying kites... now all that feels so far away. It's like I no longer have time for myself."
But she knew she had to keep moving forward and accept what life gave her. She looked at her younger siblings playing and smiled, even though her heart felt hollow. Her responsibility was no longer for herself but for the family she dearly loved.
Thus was Rina's life filled with sacrifice and hope, though she felt trapped by customs and expectations that bound her.
A Forced Engagement
Rina was still under pressure from the arranged marriage her family had planned. She couldn't imagine her future with a man she didn't know especially one much older than her, known only as a wealthy timber merchant named Mr. Mustaffa. People in the village said he was rich but stern and serious. Rina's family saw this as an opportunity to raise their social standing, but for Rina, it felt like a nightmare.
One scorching afternoon, her mother came to her with shocking news they had already set a date for the engagement ceremony.
Rina's Mother (seriously): "Rina, tomorrow we're going to Mr. Mustaffa's house. They've agreed to the proposal. You can't refuse anymore."
Rina was stunned, her chest tightening. All her life, she had never met this man, and nothing about him drew her heart. She just wanted to live like other girls free to study and play without being tied down by an arranged marriage.
Rina (weakly): "But Mother... I don't want this. I don't even know him. Why must I marry him?"
Her mother sighed deeply, looking at her daughter who was torn between duty and her own feelings.
Rina's Mother (softly): "My dear, it's for your own good. Mr. Mustaffa is rich. He can give us all a better life. Don't worry you'll get used to it."
But Rina couldn't accept it. Even though her family had decided, her heart was filled with dread. She knew she wasn't just being forced into marriage but into a life full of expectations and rules she never wanted.
That night, after everyone fell asleep, Rina sat by the window, staring into the night. The wind blew softly, carrying memories of her childhood of laughter, games, and freedom. She longed for those days when her life wasn't defined by others' choices.
Rina (in her heart): "Why must my life be like this? Why can't I choose my own path?"
Rina's Decision
The next morning, as Rina and her mother prepared to visit Mr. Mustaffa's house, Rina made a life changing decision. She would not live a life chosen for her nor be bound to a man she didn't love.
Rina (firmly): "Mother, I can't accept this proposal. I don't want to marry Mr. Mustaffa."
Her mother froze, shocked by her daughter's defiance.
Rina (with determination): "I want to choose my own life. I can't live with someone I don't love. I need to find my own path."
Her mother stood speechless, never expecting Rina to be so bold as to reject a wealthy man's offer a chance that could lift their family from poverty.
Rina's Mother (disappointed): "Rina, you don't understand. This is our chance to escape hardship."
Rina (softly): "I know, Mother. But I'd rather live poor with peace than rich in emptiness. I just want a life filled with love and freedom."
After a long and emotional discussion, her mother finally gave in. She might not fully agree, but she understood Rina had the right to choose her own destiny.
Rina felt relief, though a tinge of guilt lingered. Still, she knew she had made the right choice. Her path ahead might be difficult, but at least it would be her own.
Thus, Rina a young girl from the village
chose courage over comfort, rejecting an arranged marriage in pursuit of her own happiness.
The Persistent Suitor
Even after being rejected, Mr. Mustaffa did not give up. Every day, he came to Rina's house bringing gifts and food. He seemed unwilling to let go, still hoping to win her heart. Despite Rina's clear rejection, he kept trying, believing she would eventually change her mind.
One quiet morning, Mr. Mustaffa arrived in his luxury car, carrying bags filled with groceries and fresh food. Rina's mother, busy sweeping the yard, was startled to see him.
Mr. Mustaffa (smiling): "Good morning, Madam! I brought some food supplies. I hope this helps your family."
Rina's mother, though uncomfortable, accepted the gifts out of gratitude and necessity.
Rina's Mother (thankful): "Thank you, Mr. Mustaffa. We truly appreciate your kindness."
From inside the house, Rina heard his voice and stepped out quietly. She watched from a distance, remembering all the times he tried to persuade her but her heart remained unmoved.
Seeing Rina, Mr. Mustaffa smiled warmly and tried to speak to her in a softer tone than before.
Mr. Mustaffa (gently): "Rina, I know you're young and might not understand now, but I came here not just to give gifts. I came because I care. I can give you a happy, comfortable life you'll never have to worry again."
Rina stayed silent. No matter how many gifts he brought, she knew that luxury could never fill the emptiness in her heart.
Rina (quietly): "Thank you, Mr. Mustaffa. But I've made up my mind. I don't want a rich life without meaning. I'd rather have a simple one with freedom and love."
She made a playful face and stuck her tongue out childishly , Mr. Mustaffa chuckled, though his smile faltered slightly. He couldn't believe Rina would truly reject him despite all his efforts.
Mr. Mustaffa (softly): "You're still young, Rina. You don't know what's best for you. But I'll keep coming. I'll show you that life with me could be good. One day, you'll understand."
Days turned into weeks, and still, Mr. Mustaffa visited. Each time, he brought something sometimes a cake, sometimes groceries, sometimes cash to help the family. Rina's mother grew used to his visits, though she knew her daughter would never agree.
Rina's Mother (pleading): "Rina, Mr. Mustaffa is a good man. He helps us sincerely. Can't you think about it again?"
Rina (firmly): "Mother, I won't change my mind. I can't live just to please others. I want to live my own way."
Life became more complicated with Mr. Mustaffa's persistence. Even though Rina refused him, he never stopped trying. But Rina remained firm in her resolve.
Despite the tension and her mother's worries, Rina knew deep inside she'd rather live poor but free than live rich without happiness.