The problem was—Li Xueruo just wouldn't stop pinching his cheeks.
Li Qingchen had warned her several times, but it was useless. How much dignity could a five-year-old really command? Even the fiercest glare on that cherubic face looked like an act of cuteness.
So in the short time they'd spent together, he had lost count of how many times her fingers had squished his face.
He was starting to suspect there was something wrong with her. There always seemed to be a sparkle—no, tiny heart shapes—in her eyes when she looked at him.
A chill ran down his spine. His instincts screamed that he was in danger.
If not for the system's task, he would've fled long ago. As it was, he felt like a lamb surrounded by wolves—no, worse, by one wolf in silk robes.
"Can I take a look inside your room?" Li Qingchen brushed her hands away, speaking softly but with a trace of exasperation.
Li Xueruo tapped her chin, pretending to think deeply.
That silence made him nervous. If she refused, he'd have to sneak in somehow—an idea both desperate and shameful.
"Sure!" she finally said, smiling.
Li Qingchen froze. He had already planned out an entire infiltration mission in his head—complete with excuses and escape routes—and now she just said yes? He could've finished an entire meditation cycle in the time it took her to answer.
Still, he followed as she tugged his hand, leading him inside.
The room was simple—almost austere. A table, a bed, a few stools. The only thing remotely girlish was the faint pink curtain around the bed.
How exactly am I supposed to clean this? he thought. If he said it outright, she'd think he had some strange hobby.
After a moment's hesitation, he came up with a safer plan: get her to step out for a while, then do the job quickly.
"Do you have any green tea? I'm thirsty," he said suddenly.
He wasn't sure why he'd chosen green tea. Was there even such a thing in this world?
Li Xueruo blinked, then nodded. "No, but the girl next door should have some. I can go and borrow it."
Relief washed over him. Perfect. More time.
"Thank you…" he began, almost calling her sister before stopping himself. No, he couldn't do that. He was the future Divine Child of the Li family—how could he go around calling someone sister so casually?
Li Xueruo giggled and turned to leave. "Don't touch my underwear while I'm gone," she teased.
Li Qingchen's face went scarlet. You really know how to destroy a man's composure, don't you?
Still, her parting words made his heart thump with a guilty curiosity. He shook his head furiously, forcing his mind back on task, and summoned the broom from his system space.
"Right. Let's do this."
He began sweeping—fast, precise, efficient. Within moments, the floor gleamed. Even the air seemed cleaner.
He wiped down every surface, dusted the corners, then admired his work. "I'm amazing," he muttered with satisfaction.
Yet, oddly enough, there wasn't a single speck of dirt. The handkerchief remained spotless.
Why would the system assign me this? he wondered, puzzled. But before the thought could settle—
[Ding! Mission complete.]
His eyes lit up. Finally!
[Reward: Present Li Xueruo with a piece of clothing.]
"What the hell—?!" Li Qingchen nearly exploded. "A piece of clothing? Are you kidding me?!"
A pink glow shimmered, and a long, delicate dress materialised in his hands. Soft fabric. Gentle fragrance. Utter humiliation.
"Perfect," he muttered bitterly. "Just what every cultivator dreams of—becoming a delivery boy."
Just then—
"Master Divine Child, I'm back!" Li Xueruo's voice floated in from outside.
Li Qingchen froze. His entire body stiffened. Cold sweat beaded on his forehead. In a panic, he shoved the dress back into the system space.
He moved fast—but not fast enough. Li Xueruo caught a glimpse of the fabric's corner before it vanished.
"Um… thanks," he stammered awkwardly, forcing a smile.
But Li Xueruo's eyes narrowed. She looked around—and instantly noticed one of her own dresses missing.
A faint blush spread across her cheeks as understanding dawned.
Meanwhile, Li Qingchen pretended to sip his tea, shifting position every few seconds as if trying to look casual.
Li Xueruo walked up behind him, leaned in close, and whispered in his ear, "Master Divine Child… did you take my clothes?"
pffft!
Tea sprayed everywhere.
Even though he'd lived two lives, there was no surviving that kind of embarrassment. His ears burned crimson as he stammered incoherently, caught between shame and disbelief.
And in that mortifying silence, one thought drifted through his mind—"I just wanted to complete a quest… not unlock a death flag."
"It's like some cruel cosmic joke," he thought wryly, recalling an old line from his past life.
"Gods give you power, then laugh as you trip over it."