Time: An autumn night in Jinghe Year Three Place: The imperial bedchamber
The night grew colder.
By day, the image of a senior minister—veteran of three reigns—kneeling before the throne, threatening death unless Gu Lian took a consort, had haunted him like a specter. Though he had crushed the matter with thunderous force, The old man's words—"If Your Majesty insists on this path, you risk harming the foundation of the realm and chilling the hearts of your people!"— Had pierced the most fragile part of his heart.
At dinner, Ai Miao's expression seemed unchanged, But he was quieter than usual. He served Gu Lian with his usual care, yet barely touched his own food. Gu Lian tried to speak several times, But each attempt was met with Ai Miao's calm, unreadable gaze.
The silence lingered into the night. Only when the man beside him began to breathe in soft, steady rhythm Did Gu Lian realize—he could not sleep.
He lay on the vast dragon bed, turning restlessly. The faint scent of ink on Ai Miao's robes filled his arms, But the fear in his chest only grew.
His Ai Miao—brilliant, unbound— Should have soared freely across the skies. Yet now, because of him, He was caught in a web of worldly scorn, Branded with the name "favored but corrupt."
Would he one day… Grow tired? Choose to leave this suffocating cage?
That fear—of being left not by betrayal, but by exhaustion— Pressed down on Gu Lian's chest, And dragged him into a dream Cold as moonlight, sharp as ice.
—
He dreamed he stood alone in the vast, empty throne hall. Robed in heavy imperial garb, But the figure who always stood beside him— Was nowhere to be found.
"Ai Miao?" His voice echoed through the hall. No reply.
Panic seized him. He stumbled out, ran through familiar palace corridors, All the way to the Wen'an residence.
The gates were wide open. Inside—silence. No servants. No guards. No one.
No Ai Miao.
"Ai Miao—!" He screamed, bursting into the study.
Ai Miao was there. Standing by the window, back turned, Dressed in his usual elegant robes, tall and poised.
Gu Lian's heart leapt. He stepped forward— But Ai Miao turned.
And the eyes that met his Held no warmth. No indulgence. Only cold, complete unfamiliarity. No—worse than unfamiliarity. They held… weariness. The kind that comes after clarity.
"Your Highness," Ai Miao said. Then corrected himself. "No—Your Majesty."
"Ai Miao, what's wrong? Where are we? Let's go back—" Gu Lian reached for his hand.
Ai Miao stepped back. Avoided him with precision.
"Your Majesty," he said again, His voice so distant it chilled Gu Lian to the bone. "I'm leaving."
"Leaving? Where?" Gu Lian's voice trembled. "The northern frontier? I'll go with you—"
Ai Miao shook his head. A faint, almost pitying smile touched his lips.
"Your Majesty… don't you see? There's nowhere that needs you. It's me—who no longer wants you."
No longer wants you.
The words pierced Gu Lian's heart like poisoned ice. His blood froze.
"Why?" He could barely stand. "Is it something I did? The court's gossip? My parents—?"
"It's none of that." Ai Miao cut him off. His gaze drifted past Gu Lian, toward nothing. Like he was looking at a toy he'd long lost interest in.
"It's just… boring."
He brushed imaginary dust from his sleeve. Graceful. Cruel.
"To assist Your Majesty, to govern the realm— It once felt like a challenge. A calling. Now? Endless memorials. Ceaseless court debates. And your… exhausting affection."
He looked at Gu Lian again. The eyes that once saw into his soul Now held only cold analysis.
"To me, Your Majesty is no longer a challenge. No longer a surprise. This game of ruler and minister— I'm tired of it."
He turned. Didn't look back. Walked out into the mist. And vanished.
"No—! Ai Miao! Come back!" "Don't go! Please… don't leave me—!"
—
Gu Lian jolted awake. Breath ragged. Ai Miao's cold, weary eyes and the words "tired of you" Still clung to him like ghosts.
"Ai Miao?" He reached out— Only to find cold, empty bedding.
His heart plummeted. Panic surged like ice.
Had the nightmare… come true?
He stumbled from the bed, barefoot, Rushing out of the chamber. The night attendants dropped to their knees, terrified by his pale face and broken expression.
The wind was cool. His thin sleepwear soaked in cold sweat. He looked around like a trapped beast— Until his gaze landed on—
A lone figure in the pavilion. Back turned. Sitting quietly on a stone bench.
Moonlight poured over him, Outlining his slender shoulders. On the table: a wine pot, a white jade cup. Ai Miao poured himself a drink, graceful… and quietly lonely.
Gu Lian's heart clenched. The dream and reality overlapped cruelly.
Was he really leaving? Was this… a farewell?
He walked forward, steps unsteady, Bare feet silent on the cold stone path.
Only when he neared the pavilion Did Ai Miao pause, sensing movement behind him. But he didn't turn.
"Ai Miao." Gu Lian's voice was hoarse, thick with fear.
Ai Miao turned slowly.
His face was clear in the moonlight. Not cold. Not weary. But his eyes held something Gu Lian couldn't read— Dark, deep, like ink that wouldn't dissolve.
His cheeks were faintly flushed. He'd clearly drunk quite a bit.
"Your Majesty?" Ai Miao frowned, setting down the wine pot. "You're awake? And dressed so lightly…" He moved to take off his outer robe.
"Don't move!" Gu Lian shouted, voice raw with fear and command.
He rushed forward, grabbed Ai Miao's wrist— So tightly it nearly hurt.
He stared into Ai Miao's eyes, As if trying to see if the dream had planted seeds of departure.
"Why are you here? Why aren't you asleep?" His voice trembled. "You… you're not…"
He couldn't finish. He was afraid to ask— Are you tired of me? Afraid the answer would be yes.
Ai Miao was stunned. He had never seen Gu Lian like this. Not even during their worst misunderstandings.
He saw the red-rimmed eyes, Felt the trembling fingers, And understood.
"Your Majesty," He softened his voice. Didn't pull away. Placed his other hand gently over Gu Lian's.
"I just… couldn't sleep. Too many thoughts. I didn't want to disturb you, so I came out for a while."
"Too many thoughts?" Gu Lian wasn't soothed. The nightmare still gripped him. "What thoughts? Are you… tired? Bored? Want to—"
"Gu Lian."
Ai Miao interrupted. Called him by name.
It was like magic. Gu Lian froze. But his eyes stayed locked on Ai Miao.
Ai Miao, warmed by moonlight and wine, Looked at this wounded emperor— And the ache in his heart was replaced by something deeper. Tenderness. Love.
He didn't explain. He acted.
He lifted the hand Gu Lian was clutching, Guided it to his chest.
Through the thin fabric, Gu Lian felt the heartbeat— Strong. Fast.
"Do you feel it?" Ai Miao's voice was low, slow, Drunk and sincere.
"It beats for you."
He looked into Gu Lian's eyes. Spoke each word with clarity:
"Unless this heart stops beating— I will never grow tired of you."
Moonlight bathed them both, Their shadows stretching, merging.
Gu Lian felt the pulse beneath his palm, Heard the vow— And the nightmare's chill began to melt.
But he didn't let go. He pulled Ai Miao closer, Held him tight, As if to fuse them together.
"No more drinking alone." He buried his face in Ai Miao's neck, Voice muffled, possessive. "No more disappearing. No more… making me search for you."
Ai Miao winced at the tight grip, But wrapped his arms around Gu Lian in return, Gently patting his back— As if soothing a frightened child.
"Alright," he murmured, Soft as moonlight on still water. He knew—His Majesty must have had a terrible dream tonight. And he also knew—some fears, once rooted in the bone, Could not be dispelled with a few words.
But he had a lifetime to answer them, One night at a time.
—
It was a long while before Gu Lian's frantic heartbeat began to settle. He loosened his hold slightly, But still clung to Ai Miao's hand, His gaze falling on the untouched wine pot on the stone table.
"…Why couldn't you sleep?" he asked, His voice calmer now.
Ai Miao was quiet for a moment, Then replied softly, "Just… thinking of old things."
Like that snowy night when he left the capital. Like the warnings once whispered by the emperor's parents. Like the web of schemes and scrutiny that still lingered around them.
These thoughts, heavy and tangled, Had stirred in the stillness of night, Keeping him from rest. But he hadn't wanted to worry the man beside him.
Gu Lian caught the flicker of complexity in his eyes. He didn't press further. Instead, he picked up the cup Ai Miao had left half-full, And drained it in one smooth motion. The burn of the wine brought a trace of warmth to his chest.
"Let's go back," he said, Pulling Ai Miao to his feet with a tone that brooked no refusal. "It's cold out. If you can't sleep… I'll stay up with you."
Ai Miao looked at the side of his face, Now composed once more, And felt a soft ache bloom in his chest.
"…Alright."
—
Under the moonlight, The two of them walked back hand in hand. Their shadows leaned into each other, Shielding them from the chill of the night And the lingering echo of dreams.