I don't know how much time passed while looking at the full moon from the balcony, sitting on the improvised mat my mother gave me last year to have the chance to look outside from this window. Cold wind entered my room through the open window.
I turned my gaze to some stuff in my bedroom: a biology diploma, the books on my shelf, some things from last summer's camping trip.
How weird things were before I joined high school. In middle school, there was only Kael in my daily life. We were always like ketchup and fries, inseparable. A little laugh came out of my mouth. Melissa was always the popular one, the best at archery, a natural artist, class president… always sweet in personality with our family, but the gap between our ages didn't let her study with us. She was one year older, about to graduate from high school and now in the process of joining UNAM to study law. Meanwhile, I'm clumsy and a bit more… introverted than her. Who am I kidding? I'm a total weirdo. I'm really lucky today to have my now best friend, Leah. Remembering that made me feel tiny. Cold embraced me, and I hugged my legs, trying to keep the warm feeling.
A flashback came to my mind…
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Recess time was about to start. The ringing bell helped us realize that.
Kael, always a little gentleman, helped me carry my lunchbox outside, that was like a little backpack, on his back. He was always defending me, even if he was sometimes the laughingstock. Kids of all ages judged him, saying that, even as my cousin, he was like a lapdog. When they found out I was adopted by his family, our situation didn't improve. We went outside to eat together. I took my water bottle and was about to take a sip when a familiar voice called me.
"Alina," the children behind Eduardo were laughing, "my mom told me you're adopted and your parents are dead, but before that happened, they gave you away. Did they abandon you because you're a freak or because they didn't love you?"
Kael glared at them, his fists clenched.
"What are you talking about?! Are you insane?!" His teeth gritted.
Eduardo raised his hands, still mocking me with his entourage, also trying not to laugh loudly.
"I'm just asking her, not stating facts… but I think about it," he put his hand to his chin, pretending to think. "Now it makes sense why you're always following her. Are you in love with her?"
The children behind him started to make a little chorus, singing in a loop, "He is in love, and he will deny it".
Kael was losing his patience and turned his face to me. I looked into his eyes. I was hurt, he knew that, and those jokes about him couldn't matter to him, but he saw my hurt, and I knew him better than anyone else. He could be expelled if he hit them, as he knew how since years ago.
A girl, a follower of Eduardo, stepped forward, her arms crossed and a mocking smile on her face.
"Well, that makes a lot of sense." She took the end of one of her braids in her hand. "The lapdog is in love with his cousin," she emphasized the last word, "so obviously he's going to deny it and defend her. If she doesn't… are you going to leave her alone, like she's born to be?"
The kids didn't hide it anymore and started to laugh openly.
I felt a chill run through my body, and my eyes widened when I realized this was going to break Kael's temper. *Oh no.*
I turned to look at him, and he was indeed raising his fist. He would surely send everyone to the infirmary, meaning he would be expelled. Panic took over my body. Without thinking too much in those few instants, I splashed the water from my water bottle on Eduardo and Alondra. Kael stopped his fist mid-act, the children stopped laughing in shock, and Eduardo and his follower's expressions were priceless.
There was no time to lose. I took his free hand and pulled him to the other side where our classmates were. "Run, Kael!"
He followed my lead without saying a word or making things difficult for me. Now far away from them, and without stopping to run, I started to laugh, and he joined me.
Now, in the present, I let out a sigh.
My parents say they're sure my biological parents loved me, that they didn't abandon me. They also say that when they found me at the orphanage, they chose me because no one else was like me—love at first sight—and that the orphanage told them my parents died in a car accident and I was the last survivor of my family because they were already alone. So that means I don't even have grandparents, no one who could claim me.
Tears clouded my eyes. I should be sad about it because I have a family that really loves me, but I can't avoid feeling lonely at the same time. No one resembles me; there are no photos of my biological family, nothing at all. Did they really love me like my parents say?
I tried to clear my mind by shaking my head. I don't have time to waste. I unblocked my screensaver to check the time; it's already 11:30 p.m.
"Oh no!" I spoke softly so as not to wake my family, who were already asleep. "For God's sake, what a mess. I need to finish my homework."
I hurried to pull my notebooks out of my backpack. Well, apparently it didn't matter that I started it at school; I'm going to sleep late again tonight. And what's worse… the first class tomorrow is physical education. I'm done. If the coach sees me looking tired, she won't show any mercy anyway. And after that is math. Why does math have to be so difficult? Why did it stop being geometry? Calculus is so hard… Well, there's no time right now to think about who my parents were or if they loved me. Maybe I can find answers later when I grow up.
I started to solve the problems, but I noticed how the water in my glass moved. Was there an earthquake without the alarm sounding?My heart started beating fast as I looked around, only to realize nothing else was moving. So… was that my imagination again?
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© NATLAR, 2025