The word die crept deep into her rugged brain and deeper into her soul, sharper than any blade could, and her lungs spasmed. Finally, instinct moved her as she slid from her seat, kneeling in the small space before him.
Without hesitation, he reached out before she could think to flinch or back away. The leather of his glove brushed against her collarbones then slipped beneath the edge of the cloak. His touch was cold and hot, almost painfully so, but it broke through the fever of suffocation in quick unmistakable movement.
With swift, unthinking precision, he loosened the clasp at her throat, and the fabric fell open just enough for the chill air to find her skin. "Breathe,"
And she gasped. The first drag of breath came greedily ragged, tearing its way to her chest like burning fire. The next was easier, and then another, and another, until the world began to steady again; with the sound of the wheels, the sway of the carriage, and her heartbeat that was normal now.
Tears welled in her eyes as a consequence, spilling against her cheeks without knowledge. Lucrezia had endured the pain so much that her body was affected by the suffocation. But drawn between the fear of the creature beside her and fading breath—clearly never wanted to be noticed—endured for quite some time.
It was obvious that throughout the ride he spared her no glance yet seemed to notice when she could hardly breathe.
Genuinely, "T-Thank you," She murmured hoarsely, now settling back in her seat. Lucrezia could still tell his eyes were fixed on her the entire time but she dared not lift her head.
"You sit like a prey," He said, half a curse and more of an accusation. There was nothing sarcastic in his voice and definitely not a man-thing… of his type.
A prey?
Finally, she opened her mouth to speak, "I-Isn't that… what I am to you, Milord?" Her heart was still racing, but as a normal reaction, her voice was soft, barely above a whisper.
She recalled the moment earlier when he arrived and mentioned 'Dawn is too long a wait for a promised blood'. Lucrezia learned he wouldn't kill her yet, but that didn't mean he wouldn't hurt her.
Oh, Lucrezia… he will kill you. No one's watching, that part of her whispered mockingly at the back of her mind, sending cold sweat down her spine.
"There's a difference," he said. "'a prey' and 'my prey', Blue. We are married now. Although not comfortable, but ambitious. Isn't that what your kind do?" The way he pronounced the word 'kind' where low-key venomous with irritation coursing through every drawn letter.
But you aren't one, Lucrezia was tempted to argue. Still, she held her gaze, those innocent eyes settled somewhere away from the creature's preying gaze.
She knew he awaited her response but talking nowadays felt more painful than breathing.
At last, out of fear, "M-Most of us marry out of… love, Milord. Where the heart and soul bind them wholly till death do them part. While some…" the first person that came into her mind were her mother and she inhaled softly. "S-Some out of necessity,"
"The most loved ones prove contempt than some. An unbearable act of truce with 'some'. What was once love becomes repugnance till death do them part." He spoke like someone who ordered armies in the battle, clear, precise, and calculated. Like someone who'd observed wolves long enough to close an eye and still remember.
Lucrezia couldn't bring herself to agree with the truth in his words like always. She had grown up knowing how not to defend herself and argue with people.
The ways of wolves were different now, even the blind could tell. Not only them but other kinds as well. But then, there was a time it didn't. "O-Our kind wasn't built this way. There was once a time when love stood greater than the rest of feelings. A time where love wasn't considered a disease but… a bond. M-Many still exist, Milord. I believe you haven't witnessed those," She ended the last sentence in a careful whisper.
He didn't respond immediately, and through that time, that instinctive part of her assumed he was offended.
Lucrezia was about to apologize, terrified he would kill her now, "Long before you exist," he replied, taking her aback.
She swallowed her words, sinking to her seat. Lucrezia knew he was old, hundreds of years old, or perhaps thousands but immortality retained him. And yet, the thought of having married her great great great great great great-grandfather struck her still. "Long enough to know how sufferable they are and desperate they become."
Lucrezia didn't reply.
Partially because it was the truth, mainly because the conversation might drag on till their destination. And she also realized she had spoken more than she'd ever done since the last few years. "M-May I ask what you plan to do with me then? Are you… Are you going to kill me?"
Another jolt from the carriage and she shifted, almost knocking her body with his. Her eyes caught the flex of his fingers when she retained her stance.
"For now," That was all he said. For now?
Lucrezia opened her mouth to ask, but swallowed her words instead. Her death has always been predictable but she refused to believe it was in the hands of a Sin.
Or maybe it was.
Lucrezia didn't know how long they had been traveling for but throughout the entire tiresome journey, he didn't stop flexing his fingers. He didn't say another word after their a few words conversation' and made sure not to move too much when she felt him closer to her. So close that his exotic scent of old wood spice was all she could breathe. So close that his soft breathing was all she could hear.
If only he could move a little and away from her space. She refused to believe or acknowledge that he was only trying to be supportive especially when her head kept bumping into the side of the carriage and her body was in motion. His shoulder became a lure; for a borrowed rest as tiredness seeped into her bones.
She had never traveled this long, even since the time she arrived at Draemor. It seemed like a short journey entirely, one between half an hour but this one seemed like a very long one, and more treacherous than it ought to be.
With last night's lack of sleep in the preparation of the marriage ceremony and the morning's exhaustion, every part of her bones screamed to give up. However, Lucrezia couldn't rest. Not with him here. Not with promising death sitting right next to her.
She had not thought of it but the ride must be killing him as much as it was to her. After all, she wasn't as used to it as other ladies. But him… he was a creature who didn't need mortal means to travel. Perhaps he could fly, just as predicted, and the thought of it sent cold sweat down her spine.
But the longer Lucrezia ignored her exhaustion, the more the creature's jaw ticked and heard him mutter, "So stubborn."
Before she knew it, his arm slid around her shoulder, not roughly but in a quiet command, setting her head properly to rest against his chest.
"M-Milord," She breathed in protest.
Lucrezia stiffened at closeness as her head rested beneath his jaw and his strong arms wrapped around, locking her in place. She held her breath when he didn't move when she tried to jerk away, but her strength was unmatched.
The warmth of his body seeped into her, reviving her exhaustion in full force. Lucrezia swallowed hard. It was too much. Too close she could barely handle the intoxicating spice oozing from him. Perhaps if she didn't move, he would let her go.
Lucrezia did just that, thinking and wanting he would pull away yet hoping he wouldn't. Her action was supposed to let him loose, but it was all to her disadvantage.
God help her, her stiff body melted in his embrace. Then slowly, her head rested naturally against him. His body didn't shift against her weight, like a steel wrapped in leather, and against every instinct, her body began to relax as her lashes fluttered closed.
Lucrezia subconsciously snuggled closer when the warmth became soothing and soon drifted, unaware that the creature holding her close, stiffened.
And for the first time since their journey began, she slept peacefully.