Blood Hands
"You replace their number when you kill someone," Krim's explains to me. "Leon was number 082 before, but then he killed someone higher ranked than him and moved up into 032."
"How did that guy get up the pit anyway?" Leon scoffs. "He was weak as hell."
"We have to be careful, though," Diva says. "You guys are pretty high-ranked. You should be thankful we aren't obsessed with the ranks - but there are some crazy fuckers out there who'd be gunning for your heads."
She crushes a small pebble between her finger and thumb as she says that.
We travel with Krim's group for a while. There's no way to keep track of time down here - it's disorientating. Everything is just always the same. Always dark.
Also, the random crazy shifting thing hasn't happened again, thankfully.
There's a lot my mind. The boredom of walking through caves of nothing but rock and moss allows for plenty of time for wondering. Hunger. Home. Dying today. Dying tomorrow. Artee, Ronin, Mist and Kino. Neo's slow-healing leg. The cave creatures. Whether or not we can really trust Krim's group.
Every step I take could be by last. A Rock Scorpion could fall out of the roof and poison me, or I could get bitten on the neck by a venomous spider the size of upper body. Or maybe some crazy fucker will come out of the dark and slash me to bits.
Anyone who says they're not afraid of death has never looked it in the eye.
I probably would've gone insane a long time ago but breathing this high-chrona-concentration air clears my nerves, but I don't know if that's a good thing.
If I kill someone I'll know full well what I'm doing. Nothing will save me from the guilt."
Being with the others is what saves me.
***
We've been sticking with Krim's group and scrounging for resources, making DIY stone weapons and tools. We eat these small meal pellets - these small round balls the size of a pea - they're worth a whole meal by themselves so despite being tasteless and lack nutrition they're a life saver.
However, we only have a few that Krim's group looted previously, so we've been rationing them to one each per day.
***
Me, 004 and Neo have mostly just been trying to find Artee's group, but we've seen no people this whole time.
After evading a swarm of bats the size of my head and coming out into a small network of tunnels, with the light much dimmer than in the main cavern.
We're assuming that we've somehow managed to get into the lower levels - yeah, the cavern is split into over ten levels overlaying one another in a huge expanse larger than most big cities.
"I hate those things," Luc mutters, examining a bleeding gash in his shoulder. "Never wanna see one again."
"You sure seemed to be enjoying yourself when you were punching 'em out the air," Neo scoffs, and Cinder laughs.
"Hey guys," 092 Jora calls, pointing ahead. "What's that?"
"What's what?" Leon asks, following her finger.
We head down the tunnel and are met with a stout wooden door, hewn flat into the rock wall.
"Uh, what is this?"
"A door."
"Yeah dipshit, I can see that. I mean what's behind it?"
"Dunno. Open it, and we'll find out," Luc grins, drawing back a fist.
"Wait!" Jora stops him. "We have no idea what's behind here. It could be-"
"A nest of blood-sucking, man-eating, head-sized venomous spiders?" Neo offers.
"001 Airo?" Cinder shivers. "That guy creeps me out."
"No kidding," Diva nods vigorously.
"A pit of hungry pale vipers?"
"The darkness of Death and the abyss beyo-"
"Literally shut up."
"Well," I say, coming up beside Luc. "What if it's the place where we got these weapons from?"
I hold up the battered wood-handled stone knife Krim's given me. A primitive, monkey weapon that I wouldn't even dream of seeing at home, but here it's my lifeline.
"Food," Luc suddenly says. "I can smell food from beyond the door."
"Of course you can," Neo rolls his eyes. "What a pig."
"The smell of protein," Luc continues, breathing in deeply. "Ah, it's been too long…"
"I smell metal," Jora sniffs.
"That's the smell of blood!" Leon says, holding up a charm around his neck. "Anastasia, protect us…"
Isn't he a devout one.
"Stop that," I snap. "There's no Goddess down here."
Leon looks at me, then holds up his charm again.
"Yeah, you are right. But."
"Isn't that blasphemy?"
"Oh Anastasia," he says. "Help me find the key to the fucking door, please."
"Hallelujah," Kite mutters.
Then Luc punches the door with full force and it explodes off its hinges in a shower of rocks, dust and splinters.
"Found the key," he snorts, and plods inside. "PROTEIN!!"
Kite follows, whapping Leon on the head as he goes, and we all head into the mysterious room beyond.
"Damn," Krim says, wide-eyed when we finish coughing up dust. "This place is…"
"H…heaven…?"
"Praise Anastasia, Hallelujah," Kite mocks Leon, who death stares him.
We stare at the huge stockpile before us.
"We've struck gold," I announce.
It's a very small room, but inside are several racks hung with weapons - still crappy but better than what we've got, as well as a few crates of supplies.
We've found a supply node.
Stone knives, swords, hatchets, rusty metal bars, hammers, even a bow and arrow.
"How do I use this?" Jora asks, picking it up.
"Isn't that something from thousands of years ago?" I ask.
"Let me try," Elemental says.
Picking it up, he finds a grip, notches an arrow, draws back the string and releases it. The arrow shoots through the air and barely misses Leon's head.
"What the fuck!?" he demands. "You tryna kill me, 004!?"
He grabs two hatchets from nearby and whirls them menacingly, but everyone ignores me.
"Woah, you know how to use this?" Cinder asks, as we gather around Elemental, who lowers the bow.
"Ah… yeah."
"You sure are good at the most random things," I grin.
Not that I'm ungrateful for it though. It's just, martial arts, myths and legends, and now this basic archery from ancient times, all from this one guy.
We keep rummaging through the small storage space, this depot of sorts. Three small crates of rock-hard bread, several flasks of water, a couple changes of clothes in the form grey chronafabric T-shirts and thin black combat pants (we are incredibly grateful for that), and a bunch of knapsacks and pouches.
"PROTEIN!!" Luc hollers, grabbing a handful of grey beads from a small box. "HAHAHAHA-"
"This is a godsend," Kite grins, shovelling bread in his mouth.
"Woah, slow down!" Cinder protests. "Yer gonna eat it all!"
He jumps on Kite and suddenly they're scuffling on the floor, Kite's mouth still full. Jora's asking Elemental to teach her to shoot the bow and arrow. Diva balances a spear in either hand.
"I can make do with these," she grins.
"Dual polearms?" Cinder asks. "You never told me about this."
"I haven't told you lots of things," Diva says, flipping her brown hair dramatically.
My eyes sweep over the rows of weapons, and I shove the stone knife into my belt.
I'm pretty sure I mentioned before that I excel in hand-to-hand combat. Most notably in striking and grappling, but also…
My eyes fall on the perfect weapon. Ones I've picked every sparring match, used in every training simulation in the VR duelling systems.
A pair of shortswords - one and a half feet of sharpened stone attached to a wooden hilt wrapped in thin rope.
I picked them when I was fourteen, back when I was super edgy and thought I'd be aura farming with my dual-wield. Didn't think I'd actually grow super attached to the style and it'd carry me to the top ranks of the class.
But then, unlike in sciences and technology, I could never break out of a very solid second place for hand-to-hand. That was because of my best friend Caesar Solace.
I wonder how he's doing now, but then Neo distracts me.
"Sword, you're going with the dual wield style?"
"Yeah, you?"
Neo's examining knives, and flips one expertly.
"You have a thing for knives?" I ask.
"Yeah," he grins at me. "You bet I can do well with this one."
He shows me a wicked, ten-inch flint knife with a crude, jagged edge.
"Damn," I marvel. "You gonna kill someone with that?"
His face darkens.
"Probably."
He looks away from me slightly.
"I've been putting it off for a while. But I'm sure sooner or later it's going to happen."
I stare at him. No, not again.
"Neo, at times like this, please just shut your mouth."
Elemental comes over, face completely serious.
"Did he say something again?"
"Yes."
"What do you guys mean?" Neo demands.
"First with the leeches, and then with the Crawler, you-"
"Guys," Diva says, backing up to us. "Someone's coming. Shut up, shut up."
"Who-" Leon starts, but Krim claps a hand to his mouth.
We go dead silent.
There's a shuffling and low mumbling outside the entrance.
Neo. Please, shut up and never talk again.
"He's jinxed it again," I hiss, and Elemental nods fervently.
There are people coming. Other people. I swallow. Who? What are they gonna do…? The voices stop. My heart thumps in my chest. The silence is heavy, Jora swallows and backs up a little behind me. Cinder gets up slowly from fighting with Kite and moves to shield her, Kite goes forwards alongside Krim and Luc at the front. Diva aims one of her spears toward the entrance.
Then a low, gruff voice breaks the silence from the shadows outside.
"We know you're in there," it barks. "Come out!"
We hurl glances at each other. Krim catches my eye and nods, Neo touches my shoulder and I touch his back reassuringly. Then, as one, we head out the door, fingers tightening around weapons.
There are about ten people standing in a rough semicircle around us, all of them with weapons, and one standing right in front of us, seemingly the leader. He's tall and dark-skinned, with thick arms and the beginnings of stubble on his chin, but nowhere near as chiselled as Luc.
"What do you want?" Krim demands, taking the lead.
"Not much," the other guy says in his gruff voice. "Just leave the loot behind."
"Loot?" Jora asks.
The other guy unhooks a stone hatchet from his belt, and Krim backs up, eyes narrowing.
"Nothing personal," he says. "But while you're at it, leave behind your heads too. We all need to live right?"
His voice is rising dangerously, and my heart leaps into my throat. We're about to fight. The people around us all have bloodthirst oozing out of their eyes.
Some of them look afraid, others look apprehensive. I can see myself in their eyes. They're just innocent people pulled into this game.
"DIE!" the leader yells hoarsely, desperation in his voice, and lunges for Krim with the hatchet.
"Krim!" I yell, going forwards, but Elemental holds me back. "What're you…?"
"There's no need," he says.
"What?"
"That guy, Krim," he tells me. "From the beginning…"
The hatchet guy lunges with frightening speed, another elixir-boosted bastard. Krim doesn't even flinch. Instead, he shifts his balance onto his back leg and draws backwards.
The hatchet sails down towards his head.
At the last second, Krim pivots against the stone on his toes, whirls around and in a flash of movement lands a terrifying kick to the opponent's jaw.
He spins almost comically and hits the ground with a thump, blood leaking from his ears, nose and smashed jaw.
"Come on then," he says to us. "We're fighting."
The ten others close in on us.
I can't tell who moves first. One moment, everything's still, then it explodes into motion.
Screams, feet pounding on the rock, metal scraping against metal. Someone yells something but its drowned in the cacophony. My eyes dart wildly in their sockets.
Focus!!
I catch a flash of steel in the corner of my eye, and notice someone swinging a knife wildly at me.
I duck it and ram my shoulder into his chest, forcing him backwards with a grunt.
He grabs my arm with his hand, trying to wrench me close, his breath stinking of blood and fear.
"Fuck off!" I shriek, and shove him backwards by instinct.
Leon suddenly jumps past and split his head open with his hatchets.
My eyes widen as his head opens and blood splatters on my face. He's dead. He's dead.
"Nice assist," he nods, then clashes with someone else.
"Sword, snap out of it!" Neo yells, voice quavering. "You already saw Kard and all the others die to the bat guy! LOCK IN!!!!!"
I want to tell Neo to shut up, but I have to keep moving. The brawl is kicking up clouds of dust across the cave, and I can hardly see or breathe. Silhouettes flash in and out of the dark.
Krim's moving like lightning, a flurry of kicks and elbows, beating back two people at once, and drops one with a side-kick to the temple. Elemental tears another apart with his dual-wield of hatchet and shortsword, and the guy falls in a puddle of blood. Luc's laughing again as he whales on another guy with his fists. His whole body jerks back with every hit and he crumples under the onslaught.
"WEAK!" Luc bellows, still laughing his head off.
To my left, Diva dances circles around someone else, pumping them full of holes with her spears. Cinder's nearby, trading heavy punches with a guy a head taller than him, both their knuckles bleeding.
"Don't back off, Cinder!" Diva calls impaling her enemy through the neck.
"Wasn't planning to!" comes the reply.
He rolls forwards on his toes and lands a heavy hit to the nose. He steps further into his opponent's reach Kite lunges past them, flint knife gleaming, followed by Neo, and the two of them tear a man apart. I watch Neo's desperate eyes harden as he sinks the blade into a human's neck, and he collapses, blood gurgling.
Luc grabs someone around the waist and slams them to the ground, pounces on the them and bashes their head in. Cinder is struck in the forehead with a brutal, cracking elbow and falls.
Before he can land the finishing blow, Jora lets fly an arrow which hits the guy brutally through the mouth, exploding out the back of his head with a shower of blood.
And then someone comes for me again.
He's older than me, eyes hollow, carrying a wooden sword. He's shouting something - word's I can't hear - and he lunges and swings. I parry him and for a second, I see it. He's just a person, his hands are shaking, he is scared. So am I. My heart's hammering.
Keep calm. Pretend this is a training simulation.
I've done this hundreds of times and every time it felt real enough. I've 'killed' hundreds of times.
Why should this be any different?
I take a deep breath, shut my eyes. Picture the training room. I open my eyes.
I'm ready.
He brings his weapon down again and I twist aside, bringing my left sword up in an arc, slashing a gash in his shoulder.
His blood flicks against my face. He yells and I strike again. Neck, chest, arm.
Red lines criss-cross over his body as I slash his muscles and duck under his swings.
I know where to cut, cuz I was taught that way.
His arms drop to his sides
He's screaming, his eyes are full of terror, bloodshot and terrified, begging me, crying.
Yeah, I'm sorry too. But I can no longer hesitate.
I draw my blade across his neck in a motion I've He staggers backward, eyes wide and eyeballs trembling, gurgling and coughing. His hands claw at his throat then reach out towards me.
"Ple-ase," he rasps, staring at me in fear.
Then he drops to the ground, twitching.
"AAAAAAAARGH!!!" I find myself yelling, blood rushing to my head.
I fall on him and plunge my blade into his stomach. It feels like pushing into a packed, heavy cushion.
Then there's no resistance at all. The glistening stone slides into his body. It takes much less strength than the simulations suggest. Blood bubbles around the blade disgustingly and I wrench it out.
I feel sick.
I look at the corpse.
I'm a killer.
I've crossed a line I can't ever take back.
Then someone slams into me from the side, howling, hands tearing at my face.
Elemental knocks him off me with a kick that sends him sprawling, and Luc pounces on him, bashing his head with a brutal crunching and wet splat.
"You good?" 004 asks.
"Yes," I breathe, even though I'm not.
Krim finishes off the last one with a flying kick to the nose, and it's over. Silence falls again, except for the sound of dripping water in the background.
The enemy is gone, all of them.
Cinder's limping slightly, clutching his bleeding head, and Leon's got a gash in his cheek. Jora lowers her bow and arrow. Luc stretches his shoulders and grins.
"Well, that was easy."
Elemental looks at me.
"Sword."
I look down. The dead man at my feet hasn't moved. The cave smells like iron and mud. For a second, it doesn't feel real. My hands hurt, and my throat's closing.
"I…" I can't finish the sentence.
"Hey," Neo says. "You did what you have to do."
"Are you alright?" Elemental asks, concerned. "You-"
"No, no," I say. "I'm fine. I'm… I'm fine."
"Well, that's that," Kite says, laying a hand on my shoulder. "We've all gone somewhere that we can't come back from now… so…"
"Let's keep moving," Krim says, nodding to me.
"Right."
We leave behind the corpses in the tunnel. People are arming themselves, people are changing, they are adapting to this hell.
If I don't want to be left behind, then I too need to change.
If it means I can survive, I will gladly redden these blood hands.