The clock showed 10 PM.
Emma sat in her own room. A small room, dark, and quiet. The light was turned on just a little.
Lily was already asleep. Emma heard Lily's steady breathing from the next room. Calm breathing. The breathing of a child with no big worries.
But Emma couldn't sleep.
Emma sat on the edge of her bed. She held the contract paper that Mr. Thomas gave her. The paper was still new. Still smelled like a photocopy from a printer machine.
Emma read her own signature on the first page.
Emma Claire Wilson.
The name looked strange. Like someone else's name, not Emma's.
Emma started to cry. Not much. Just tears flowing slowly from her eyes.
She didn't know why she was crying. Emma should be happy. Emma should be relieved. Because Lily would have surgery. Because Emma had money now.
But Emma felt afraid instead.
Afraid of what? Emma herself didn't know.
Emma lay down on her bed. She covered her face with a pillow.
She thought about what would happen tomorrow.
Tomorrow, Emma would get married.
Married to Marcus. Her boss. A cold man. A man who almost never talked to her except for work orders.
They would go to the state registry office. They would meet with Mr. Thomas and his secretary who would be witnesses.
They would sign the marriage document.
And Emma would officially become Marcus's wife.
Wife.
The word felt strange to Emma's ears.
Emma never imagined she would get married like this. No love. No affection. Just a contract. Just money. Just business interests.
Emma knew from the beginning that this was a contract. But now, when it was really close, Emma started to feel afraid.
What would the people at the office say?
What would her neighbors say?
What if someone asked details about their marriage?
What if someone suspected that this wasn't a real marriage?
Emma thought about many things. Too many things.
Suddenly, Emma remembered something. Something that made her chest tight.
Emma remembered her childhood.
Childhood Emma with her Father and Mother.
Emma's father was a teacher. A kind-hearted teacher. A teacher who always smiled. Emma's father wasn't rich, but he always tried to give the best for his children.
Emma's mother was a nurse. A loving mother. A mother who was always there when Emma was sick. A mother who always listened to Emma's stories before sleep.
Emma still remembered. When Emma was 6 years old. Father and Mother took Emma to the park. In that park, they played together. Father pushed Emma on the swing. Mother took a photo of Emma smiling.
Emma remembered how happy she was at that time.
Emma remembered how safe it felt to be near Father and Mother.
But all of that disappeared 5 years ago.
Emma opened her eyes. She didn't want to remember anymore.
But it was too late. The memory had come.
Emma remembered that day clearly. Like it happened just yesterday.
That day was a rainy day.
Emma didn't go to school because she had a fever. Emma slept at home. Mother was at home too, taking care of Emma.
Father went to school like usual.
At 11 AM, someone knocked on the house door.
Mother opened the door.
There were police officers.
There was a doctor from the hospital.
They brought news that destroyed everything.
Emma's father and some other teachers had a car accident. Their car was hit by a truck on the highway. Everyone in the car died.
Emma remembered Mother screaming. A scream that sounded like someone in pain.
Emma's mother collapsed. She fell to the floor.
Emma remembered she got down from her bed. Even though her fever was still high. Emma remembered she hugged Mother.
"Mother, don't. Mother must be strong," whispered Emma who was only 10 years old at that time.
But Mother couldn't be strong.
Emma's mother never recovered from that news.
Lily was still a baby back then. Lily was only 2 months old.
Emma's mother had to take care of baby Lily while mourning Father's death.
Emma's mother worked overtime. Mother started to stress a lot. Mother's blood pressure went up.
The doctor told Emma's mother she must rest. The doctor said stress is the enemy of health.
But Emma's mother couldn't rest. Mother had to work. Mother had to pay for the house. Mother had to take care of her children.
Emma's mother didn't listen to the doctor's advice.
One day, when Emma was 15 years old, Emma came home from school. Emma saw Mother sleeping on the sofa.
Emma tried to wake Mother up.
But Mother didn't wake up.
Emma's mother had a stroke. A heart attack that happened because of prolonged stress.
Emma's mother died 3 days later in the hospital.
Emma stopped crying for a moment. But her eyes stayed wet.
After Mother died, Emma had only one responsibility: Lily.
Emma, who was still a child at that time, had to become a parent. Emma had to take care of Lily. Emma had to pay for the house. Emma had to pay for Lily's school.
Emma didn't go to school anymore. Emma looked for work.
First, Emma worked at a restaurant. Emma washed dishes. Emma's salary was very small.
Then, Emma looked for other work. Emma worked at a store. Emma became an assistant. The salary was still small.
Emma tried. Emma learned. Emma took a free English course from the internet.
Finally, Emma got a job at Marcus's office as a secretary.
Emma worked hard. Emma wanted Lily to have a good life. Emma wanted Lily to go to school normally. Emma wanted Lily not to be like Emma.
Now, Emma remembered all of that. Remembered how hard Emma's struggle had been.
And Emma was afraid.
Afraid because Emma had already made a big decision. A decision that might change everything.
Afraid because Emma would live in Marcus's house. A house that was big, cold, and felt strange.
Afraid because Emma would pretend to be Marcus's wife. Pretend in front of others. Lie every day.
Emma wasn't used to lying.
Emma was always honest. Emma always said things as they are.
But now, Emma had to lie.
Emma had to pretend to love Marcus.
Emma had to pretend to be happy.
Emma had to pretend this was a real marriage.
Emma felt her body trembling.
Afraid. Very afraid.
Emma stood up from her bed. She walked out of her room.
She went to the kitchen. She took a glass of water. The water was cold and helped Emma feel a little calmer.
Emma looked toward Lily's room.
Lily's door was open. Emma could see Lily from a distance.
Lily slept peacefully. Lily's face looked innocent. Without any worries.
Emma remembered why she was doing this.
Everything for Lily.
Lily's surgery.
Lily would be healthy.
Lily would be able to play like normal children.
Lily wouldn't die because of a weak heart.
Emma made this decision for Lily.
Whatever Emma had to do, Emma would do it.
Even if Emma had to lie.
Even if Emma had to marry Marcus who was a stranger.
Even if Emma had to live in a big house that was frightening.
Emma went back to her room. She slept.
But Emma's sleep wasn't peaceful. Emma had nightmares all night.
Emma dreamed she was alone. Alone in the middle of a big city. Everyone didn't know who she was. Everyone ignored Emma.
Emma dreamed she was running. Running looking for Lily. But couldn't find her.
Emma dreamed Lily was crying. Crying calling for her sister.
But Emma couldn't reach Lily.
Emma woke up with gasping breath.
The clock already showed 5 AM.
The day was almost beginning.
Emma's wedding day had already started.
Emma woke up. She couldn't sleep anymore.
Emma showered with cold water.
Emma wore her best work uniform. The black uniform that was the neatest.
Emma combed her hair. Emma looked in the mirror.
Emma's face was pale. Emma's eyes were red from crying all night.
But Emma smiled.
Emma needed to smile. Because today, Emma would get married.