The "Grand Alliance" between Rina and Haruka, forged in the fires of mutual LUNA-induced panic, is proving to be less of a strategic partnership and more of a barely controlled demolition derby. Their shared goal- to somehow compete with LUNA's overwhelming talent and resources- is constantly undermined by their primary, undeclared goal: competing for my attention.
Their first joint "strategy session" takes place in our apartment living room, which now permanently looks like a fabric store exploded. Miki and Hana are present, attempting to act as mediators and project managers. Kenji is also there, acting as the official court jester and snack consumer.
"Okay," Miki says, trying to bring the meeting to order. She has a whiteboard set up, covered in complex diagrams and timelines. "LUNA's primary advantage is her technical innovation and her immersive booth design. We cannot match her budget, so we need to focus on our strengths: performance, emotional connection, and craftsmanship."
"My craftsmanship is flawless," Haruka states, examining her perfectly manicured nails. "Hinamata's is… improving."
"My emotional connection with the fans is leagues beyond yours, Ito," Rina retorts, not missing a beat. "People actually like me."
"They pity you," Haruka sneers.
"Okay!" Miki cuts in sharply before a full-scale battle can erupt. "Focus! We need a concept. Something that showcases both of your strengths, creates a narrative, and draws attention away from LUNA's spectacle."
"How about a duel?" Rina suggests, her eyes glittering. "A classic light versus dark battle. We can choreograph a fight scene."
"Too predictable," Haruka dismisses immediately. "And who would win? Obviously, my character is stronger."
"Seraphina represents hope! She would totally win!"
"Morwen commands legions of the undead! Hope stands no chance!"
"Maybe," Hana suggests timidly, "you could do something… together? Like a combined performance?"
"Combined how?" Rina asks suspiciously.
"Like… a dance?" Hana offers.
Rina and Haruka both look at each other, then at Hana, then back at each other, their expressions identical masks of pure horror.
"Absolutely not," Haruka says.
"I would rather cosplay as a toilet," Rina agrees.
The brainstorming session devolves rapidly. Every idea is either shot down immediately or becomes a new platform for them to snipe at each other. Kenji tries to help by suggesting a three-person cosplay involving me as a handsome prince being fought over by the two queens. Rina loves the idea. Haruka throws a pillow at him.
"This is getting us nowhere," Miki sighs, rubbing her temples. "We need a theme that allows for individual brilliance but also creates a compelling joint narrative."
"How about 'Rivals United by a Common Love'?" Rina suggests, giving me a pointed, meaningful look.
"What love?" Haruka asks, genuinely confused. "Love of cosplay?"
"No," Rina says, her smile turning predatory. "Love of my Onii-chan."
Haruka chokes on her tea. Kenji howls with laughter. Miki just puts her head down on the table with a quiet groan. Hana looks like she wants to disappear.
I stand up. "Okay, that is my cue," I announce. "I am going out. For air. And possibly to join a monastery. Call me if you decide to actually work together."
I make my escape, leaving the crumbling alliance to their chaotic devices. The only thing Rina and Haruka seem capable of collaborating on is driving me completely insane.