Chapter 398 — Recruitment, Equations, and Electric Mouse
Mister Mind adjusted his mask slightly.
— I think it's time for us to return.
In his shadow, a smile appeared.
But in Samael's shadow too.
The two shadows seemed to look at each other… and smile.
Haya sighed.
— We're not out of the woods yet.
Bloodweaver shrugged.
— Why? They're just lunatics.
— Not as much as you.
Mira timidly raised her hand.
— I thought Mister Bloodweaver was the most lucid… like he told me?
Haya burst out laughing.
— Of course that's false. The most sane one here is me.
She pointed at Bloodweaver.
— Him, he's a specialist in poisons and human anatomy.
He does macabre experiments in his free time.
Bloodweaver paled.
— Stop ruining my reputation!
— What reputation? asked Haya innocently.
Bloodweaver turned to Mira.
— Don't listen to her. In this group, only I am sane. Even Nightmare can testify.
Mira blinked.
— But… Nightmare is only a few hours older than me. How can he be a credible witness?
Silence.
Nightmare crossed his arms, solemn.
— Age is not a matter of duration… but of maturity.
Haya stared at him.
— You said that because you read an inspiring scroll ten minutes ago.
Brakk raised his hand.
— If it helps, me and Bloodweaver are the only sane ones here.
Everyone turned toward him.
— Exactly, he continued proudly.
Who, besides us two, can calmly discuss while people stop time, manipulate cosmic pacts, and open portals?
Haya raised an eyebrow.
— Innocent doesn't mean sane.
— I'm not innocent!
— You signed a pact without reading the fine print.
— IT WAS WRITTEN SMALL!
Samael raised his hand.
— My children. Let's return to the guild.
In Haya's mind, complex equations began to form.
Arcane symbols spun around her like a cosmic blackboard.
Her aura released slightly.
The pressure became crushing.
Brakk stepped back.
— What's she doing now?
Bloodweaver observed calmly.
— She's casting a spell.
Haya raised a hand.
A simple mudra.
A sign.
Space bent.
A dimensional portal opened.
Brakk blinked.
— Wait… She didn't use a mudra when she brought us here.
Mister Mind replied calmly:
— It depends on the caster's level of mastery.
She uses Arcane magic.
Brakk frowned.
— I don't remember seeing Valor make signs or chant.
Samael smiled.
— It depends on the level of mastery.
And besides… making signs is stylish.
Pause.
— And when she stopped time for two seconds, she made a sign. You just didn't notice.
Brakk froze.
— Now that you mention it…
Haya walked past him.
— Don't get ideas.
It's just for style.
— So you could do without it?
— Yes.
— Then why do you—
— For. The. Style.
Brakk nodded.
— Respect.
---
**Hunters' Side**
Liora sighed.
— Let's go home too.
Evans raised his hand.
— Fine. I'll go first.
He vanished in an explosion of lightning.
Silence.
Nova calmly packed his instruments.
— He's going to blow something up again.
— Probably an innocent landscape, replied Lya.
An ozone blast filled the air.
A lightning bolt struck the ground.
Evans appeared, unstable golden aura.
— Valentine, we're moving.
Valentine, sitting on a crate, looked up.
— Ah. He's back.
— Zahkariel fled. Samael made a pact. Everything's a mess.
Lya arrived behind him.
— He forgets to mention he has a new codename.
Evans froze.
— Lya. Don't. Say. Anything.
— It's cute though.
She leaned toward Valentine.
— We call him Pikachu.
Silence.
The lightning shifted from yellow to pure white.
— I'M GOING TO VAPORIZE YOU ALL!
Valentine sighed.
— Pikachu, huh? That explains why you need a Cheri berry.
— EVEN YOU?!
Delta intervened.
— Stop yelling.
Xander stifled a laugh.
— Honestly, I get why he's yelling. How can you call a guy like that Pikachu?
Lya shrugged.
— He crackles, he jumps around, he has anger fits…
The comparison was inevitable.
Evans pointed a trembling finger at her.
— I AM A GOD OF THUNDER!
Valentine crossed her arms.
— Yes. Plush version.
Nova whispered to Liora:
— He's going to blow up a mountain.
In the distance.
BOOM.
— Too late.
---
**Sanctuary of Whispers**
Brakk paced nervously.
Mister Mind placed a scroll on a table.
— Sign here.
— What is it?
— Your membership form for Samael's Assassin Guild.
Brakk paled.
— I didn't agree!
Haya gave him a light smack on the back of the head.
— Dad paid an SSS-rank debt for you, mosquito.
Sign before I test my new curses.
Mira approached.
— Can't we just absorb him?
Nightmare intervened.
— No.
We don't eat colleagues.
At least… not before the trial period ends.
Mister Mind nodded.
— We have ethics.
Brakk trembled.
— What's the trial period?
Haya drew a dark dagger.
— If you're still alive in ten minutes, you get the job.
Bloodweaver raised a finger.
— Job benefits:
• Dynamic atmosphere
• Dimensional travel
• Variable survival chances
— Life insurance? asked Brakk.
— No.
— Vacation?
— Neither.
— Meal vouchers?
— You are the voucher.
Silence.
Brakk signed.
Very quickly.
Very, very quickly.
In the distance, Evans blew up a second hill.
The narrator concluded:
Diplomacy was over.
Recruitment had begun.
And somewhere in the Omniverse,
a god of thunder was still trying to convince the world
he wasn't an electric mouse.
Chapter 399 — God of Thunder, Updated
Evans no longer shouted.
He no longer moved.
The air around him vibrated at such a low frequency that the windows of the remaining buildings shattered one after another.
The yellow lightning vanished.
A crown of blue electric plasma rose around him, forming a pillar linking the ground to the clouds.
Valentine stepped back.
Her mocking smile had just gone on vacation.
— Evans… calm down. We were joking.
He slowly turned his head.
His eyes were no longer eyes.
Two slits of blinding light.
When he spoke, it was not a sound.
It was a pressure in their ribs.
— Laugh while you can.
The desert fell silent.
— But never forget why lightning always strikes the mountain's peak.
He raised a finger toward the sky.
Total silence.
Even the wind decided it wasn't its day.
His aura distorted the air.
Time itself seemed hesitant to keep functioning.
Delta fell to his knees.
— It's… heavy…
Xander snapped his grimoire shut.
— Okay.
We stop the jokes. Definitely.
No more Pokémon.
The narrator, very serious:
— You can laugh at a sleeping lion…
But when it wakes, you remember why it is King.
Nova looked at his watch.
Tapped the dial.
— Done? Or do you want five more dramatic minutes?
Silence.
The plasma pillar flickered.
Evans stayed still for a second.
Then blinked.
The pressure dropped.
The blue lightning retracted into his skin, leaving faint smoke drifting from his shoulders.
He took a deep breath.
Stretched.
— Feels good… doesn't it?
A shocked silence answered him.
Lya put a hand on her hip.
— Oh, he's fine.
After nearly folding the multiverse like a towel…
Mister says it feels good.
Valor raised a solemn finger.
— Only the Great Valor has the right to use Aura Release to flex.
You don't have administrative authorization.
Evans blinked.
— You need authorization?
Ryn nodded.
— Form A-38.
Three signatures.
Official seal.
Delta, still on the ground:
— And collateral damage insurance…
Xander raised his hand.
— By the way… you had way too much aura.
Evans straightened his shoulders, proud.
— Thanks for the compliment.
— That wasn't a compliment.
— I'll take it anyway.
Valentine put away her light bow.
She approached and patted his shoulder.
A bit too hard.
A small spark shot out reflexively.
— We know, Evans. We follow you.
Even when you throw your "God-King" tantrum every two hours.
Delta picked up his shield.
— I'm going to start billing for auditory trauma.
Nova looked at the still-smoking sky.
— Seriously, you made the weather tremble.
Lya crossed her arms.
— Wait until I tell Liora.
Evans froze.
— You won't tell her anything.
— Oh yes.
— Lya.
— Yes?
— Don't forget I can call down lightning.
She shrugged.
— And I can call down your reputation.
Silence.
Xander whispered to Delta:
— She won.
Delta nodded.
— Definitely.
Evans sighed.
— Fine… sorry about all that.
I got a little carried away.
Valentine tilted her head.
— A little?
Nova raised three fingers.
— Cosmic threat level: 8.5 out of 10.
Ryn corrected.
— 9.
He made my weapon vibrate.
Valor struck a dramatic pose.
— Next time you want to impress someone…
Just do an artistic lightning bolt.
— An artistic lightning bolt?
— Yes.
Aim at the sky, make a classy little sound, everyone applauds.
Xander added:
— No need to announce the Apocalypse at every joke.
Evans ran a hand through his hair.
— You're exaggerating.
In the distance, a mountain slowly collapsed.
Everyone turned their heads.
Nova:
— What was that?
Evans looked away.
— The wind.
Silence.
Valentine narrowed her eyes.
— Wind doesn't melt rock.
— It was motivated wind.
The narrator concluded:
He was no longer the electric mouse.
He was no longer the walking tantrum.
He was a God of Thunder.
…
Who needed a short timeout after every existential crisis.
And somewhere, in another dimension,
Haya sneezed.
— Someone just did another huge cosmic blunder.
Mister Mind looked up from his scroll.
— Evans?
— Evans.
Brakk sighed.
— I feel like my trial period is going to be more dangerous than expected.
Chapter 400 — Trial Period (Non-refundable)
**Sanctuary of Whispers.**
Brakk still held the quill above the shadow parchment.
The quill smoked.
The parchment whispered.
Literally.
— Sign… sign… sign…
Brakk swallowed hard.
— Why is the contract talking to me?
Mister Mind adjusted his mask.
— It's a feature.
Built-in motivation.
Haya crossed her arms.
— It's mostly because it's hungry.
— The contract is hungry?!
— It consumes hesitation, Samael explained calmly.
And you hesitate a lot.
The parchment swallowed a small gray cloud that escaped Brakk's head.
— Hey! That was an important thought!
Nightmare looked over his shoulder.
— No.
It was "what if I jumped out the window."
Brakk stiffened.
— HOW DID YOU—
— I'm the incarnation of nightmares.
I do this to relax.
Mira innocently raised her hand.
— Can we keep him if he's funny?
Bloodweaver sighed.
— Mira, he's not a hamster.
— Can we still give him a wheel?
Brakk:
— I'M RIGHT HERE.
Samael approached.
Calm. Elegant. Smiling.
The kind of smile that signs pacts before breakfast.
— Brakk, my boy.
It's just a formality.
— A formality that could cost me my soul!
Mister Mind tilted his head.
— Oh no.
Your soul is in Annex B.
Brakk turned pale.
Haya cracked her fingers.
— Sign.
Dad paid an SSS-rank debt for you.
— I didn't ask you for anything!
— Exactly, Bloodweaver replied.
That's what makes it generous.
---
**Meanwhile… in the still-smoking desert.**
Evans stared at the sky.
Valentine chewed something.
— What's that?
— A Cheri berry.
Silence.
— Seriously?
— You never know.
If you reboot in "Apocalypse Pillar" mode, I'll throw it at you.
Delta nodded.
— Solid plan.
Xander raised his grimoire.
— I added a note:
"Don't provoke Evans after 6 PM."
Ryn observed the vitrified ground.
— He still melted two kilometers of sand.
Valor put his hands on his hips.
— Hmph.
Acceptable performance.
Evans raised an eyebrow.
— Acceptable?
— Yes.
The Great Valor would have done three kilometers.
— You want to test that?
Valor stepped back.
— It's not a competition.
It's… a technical evaluation.
---
**Back at the Sanctuary.**
Brakk trembled.
— What exactly is the trial period?
Haya answered without hesitation:
— If you survive ten missions.
— TEN?!
Mister Mind corrected:
— Technically eight.
Two are educational.
— EDUCATIONAL?!
Nightmare patted Brakk's shoulder.
— The first, you observe.
The second, you scream.
The third, you run.
Mira tilted her head.
— And the fourth?
Bloodweaver replied calmly:
— We improvise.
Brakk looked at Samael.
— You're all insane.
Samael placed a hand on his shoulder.
Warm. Worrying.
— No, Brakk.
He smiled.
— We are organized.
Silence.
The parchment whispered louder.
— Sign sign sign sign…
Haya released a micro-pressure of aura.
Brakk felt his knees shake.
— OK OK OK!
He signed.
Instantly, the parchment absorbed the ink… then glowed.
A mark appeared on Brakk's hand.
A small rune.
Mira clapped.
— He got a tattoo!
Nightmare studied the rune.
— Congratulations.
You are officially in permanent danger.
Brakk looked at his hand.
— I already regret this.
---
**At the same time. In the desert.**
A miniature lightning bolt struck Evans' head.
Zap.
Everyone froze.
Evans blinked.
— … Why did I hit myself?
Xander checked his grimoire.
— Karmic backlash.
Valentine burst out laughing.
— The mountain got revenge.
Ryn added:
— Or the multiverse pressed "reminder."
Evans crossed his arms.
— Very funny.
A second mini-bolt.
Zap.
Delta couldn't hold back.
— Okay, that one was deserved.
---
**Sanctuary.**
Mister Mind noticed a subtle vibration in the air.
His shadow smiled.
— Interesting…
Samael felt the same.
— He pushed too far again.
Haya sighed.
— He's going to end up cracking something important.
Bloodweaver shrugged.
— As long as it's not our dimension.
A microscopic fissure appeared in the ceiling.
Everyone looked up.
Silence.
The fissure vanished.
Mira:
— What was that?
Nightmare:
— Probably Evans.
Brakk looked around.
— Can I still cancel?
The whole group:
— No.
---
**The narrator concluded:**
Chapter 400.
A contract signed.
A God of Thunder under surveillance.
A Guild recruiting.
And somewhere…
The multiverse had just opened a file.
File name:
"Evans — To be monitored."
Chapter 401 — Trial Mission
**Sanctuary of Whispers.**
Brakk was still staring at the rune on his hand.
It glowed faintly… then changed color.
— Why is it changing color?
Mister Mind answered calmly:
— Danger indicator.
The rune shifted from blue… to violet.
Brakk turned pale.
— Violet means what?
Nightmare looked at the rune.
— Statistically?
— Yes.
— You're going to suffer.
Brakk:
— THAT'S NOT A STATISTIC.
Haya stretched.
— Well. First mission.
Brakk raised his hand.
— I signed thirty seconds ago!
— Exactly.
— Isn't there an integration period?
Bloodweaver replied:
— Yes.
— Ah!
— It lasts about… five minutes.
Brakk looked around.
— How long has it been?
Mira counted on her fingers.
— Six minutes.
Brakk:
— I'VE BEEN SCAMMED.
Samael rose from his stone seat.
The air changed immediately.
When the Angel of Death stood… it was rarely to ask for tea.
— An anomaly has been reported.
Mister Mind conjured a dimensional map.
A zone blinked red.
Brakk squinted.
— Where is that?
— An old temple in a secondary dimension.
Nightmare read the data.
— Presence of unknown entity.
Narrative distortion.
Probability of death: 73%.
Brakk:
— WHY DO YOU SAY THAT SO CALMLY?!
Haya shrugged.
— Because the average is usually 90%.
Brakk:
— OH GREAT.
Mira tugged Bloodweaver's sleeve.
— Can we take him?
— Who?
— Brakk.
— Why?
— To see how long he survives.
Brakk:
— I'M RIGHT HERE.
Nightmare placed a hand on his shoulder.
— Courage.
— YOU SAY THAT LIKE I'M GOING TO DIE.
— Because it's statistically plausible.
---
**Meanwhile… in the desert.**
Evans walked ahead of the group.
Silent.
Very silent.
Valentine whispered to Delta:
— He's sulking.
Delta nodded.
— Clearly.
Xander watched the clouds.
— Or recharging.
Ryn sighed.
— I'd prefer sulking.
Evans suddenly stopped.
— You know I can hear you.
Valentine smiled.
— We hoped so.
Lya appeared, strolling casually behind them.
— So, Pikachu, recovered from your crisis?
Evans froze.
The group held its breath.
A small spark appeared above his head.
Zap.
Valentine burst out laughing.
— Karma's fast today.
Evans sighed.
— If anyone repeats that nickname…
Another mini spark.
Zap.
Xander murmured:
— The multiverse is definitely against him.
---
**Sanctuary of Whispers.**
A dimensional portal opened.
Haya cracked her fingers.
— Well. Let's go.
Brakk stepped back.
— Wait… we're leaving now?
Mister Mind nodded.
— Yes.
— Without preparation?
Bloodweaver thought.
— Hmm…
— YOU'RE THINKING ABOUT THAT NOW?!
— No, it's fine, he said finally. We can improvise.
Brakk:
— THAT'S NOT REASSURING.
They crossed the portal.
---
**Moments later… Abandoned Temple.**
Broken columns.
Cracked statues.
A black mist floated in the air.
Brakk whispered:
— Okay… this is clearly a trap.
Nightmare studied the runes on the ground.
— No.
— What?
— A very bad trap.
Mira jumped onto a stone.
— Hello mysterious entity!
Silence.
Haya sighed.
— Mira.
— Yes?
— We don't greet anomalies.
The mist shifted.
A deep voice echoed.
— Who dares enter my domain?
Brakk stepped back.
— Oh no…
A gigantic silhouette emerged from the shadows.
Three meters tall.
Body of shadow.
Red eyes.
It roared:
— I AM THE ANCIEN—
BOOM.
The creature flew through three columns.
Everyone turned their heads.
Bloodweaver blew on his fist.
— Sorry.
Brakk blinked.
— What?
Bloodweaver looked at the unconscious creature.
— Reflex.
Haya sighed.
— Well.
She looked at Brakk.
— Pedagogical mission number one.
— What?
— Tie it up.
Brakk stared at the gigantic monster.
Then at the group.
Then back at the monster.
— It's three meters tall.
Mira raised her hand.
— I can absorb it.
Everyone:
— NO.
---
**The narrator concluded:**
Brakk's first mission.
Total duration: forty-two seconds.
The ancient creature?
Knocked out.
The Guild?
Still just as strange.
And Brakk had just realized one essential truth:
The danger in this group…
wasn't the monsters.
It was his teammates.