— — — — — —
Inside the hospital, Kanzaki Hajime finally woke up after being unconscious for who knows how long. His whole body was wrapped in bandages and casts.
"Kanzaki, you're finally awake. Want an apple?"
Shintaro Natsume, lying in the bed next to him, lifted the apple in his hand. His own legs were bandaged and there were plasters all over his face.
"Kanzaki-boss, you good?"
Across the room, Shiroyama Takeshi walked in with a freshly bought lunch. He was the lucky one. Kanzaki had knocked him out earlier, so he conveniently missed the beating Kazuma handed out afterward. Out of everyone here, his injuries were the lightest.
"Natsume, Shiroyama… did I… lose?"
Kanzaki blinked at the crowded ward, packed with Ishiyama High students lying around like fallen dominoes. His mind still wasn't fully back online.
"You lost. That teacher is stupidly strong, like some kinda monster. One move and you were down. Then he flattened the rest of us in almost no time."
Natsume took a bite of his apple, smiling to himself. After wandering around outside for a while, he had to admit: Ishiyama was the most entertaining place after all.
In truth, his strength surpassed Kanzaki's, but he had zero interest in being boss. He preferred sticking by Kanzaki and watching the drama. He never expected that just spectating would get him beaten up too.
"Damn it… I lost this time, but next time, I'm definitely coming back for the win!" Kanzaki was frustrated, but he had to admit that he wasn't on the same level as that monster-teacher.
His so-called finishing move had looked like child's play to that guy. Not only did the teacher catch the yogurt mid-air, he grabbed Kanzaki by the leg right after.
And then… Kanzaki shuddered. Thinking about it now still scared the life out of him. He was definitely having nightmares tonight.
"Once I heal up, we're doing special training. We're finding a way to take that monster down!" Kanzaki practically shouted.
"Classic Kanzaki," Natsume said, glancing at the others who were enthusiastically agreeing with him. He shook his head. The idiots at this school really did have only one admirable trait: cockroach-level durability.
...
Meanwhile, outside, Hidetora Tojo, the Legend of Ishiyama, was selling ice cream at his part-time job when his underlings, Shoji Aizawa and Kaoru Jinno, showed up.
"Tojo-nii, I heard there's some insanely strong 'monster teacher' at school now. Wanna go check it out?"
Tojo handed each of them an ice cream before raising a brow. "A teacher? At our school? Since when do we even have teachers?"
"They say he's just a temp worker. But honestly, judging by what I heard, calling him a teacher is generous. He's more delinquent than we are."
"On his first day, he sent half the school to the hospital. Second day, he sent most of the remaining half there too. And he beat Kanzaki."
"Not only that, he soloed over a hundred guys from Teimo High and then strung them up at their school gate."
"He's rumored to be super vicious, super cruel, and doesn't treat people like people at all."
Aizawa took a bite of his ice cream as he spoke.
"Oh? Sounds fun." Tojo grinned. As Ishiyama's strongest, he loved fighting strong opponents. That was how he kept getting stronger.
"Tojo-nii, you wanna go fight him? Want me to test him first? See if he's as tough as they say?" Aizawa laughed. His strength surpassed Kanzaki's by a mile anyway.
"...I'd love to go beat him up right now, but I haven't finished my shift. If I leave early, the boss will cut my pay."
"And I still have my morning paper route, the milk deliveries, flyering before noon, and the afternoon shift at Keideki Chicken."
"And tonight…... oh and after midnight…... yeah, I actually don't have time for a fight."
Tojo frowned as he mentally ran through his schedule. He really had no free time at all. At least not today.
"Tojo-nii… you work too many jobs!"
Aizawa gaped. Seven or eight jobs at once? Was he trying to become the patron saint of part-time work?
"Well, hope that monster-teacher sticks around. I wanna fight him properly." Tojo turned back to them. "That'll be 100 yen for the ice cream."
"Huh? I thought you were treating us!"
Aizawa and Jinno stared at their empty ice cream cup in disbelief. They had to pay?
"Buy one get one free. The free one is my treat, but the one you bought still costs money." Tojo gave them a bold, satisfied grin.
---
At a shrine, in the headquarters of the Red Tail gang, Aoi Kunieda was having a meeting with her girls.
"Boss, we got a new teacher at school!"
"I heard he's some cheating scumbag who's juggling women and even has a kid. He brought the kid to school too!"
Nene Ōmori slapped the floor dramatically. "If he sees us, female students, that pervy teacher will definitely try something!"
"And rumor has it he's vicious, ruthless, and doesn't treat people like people. Apparently his girlfriend even fears him so much that she was about to cry."
"Hmm… that kind of shame-play… kinda interesting," Chiaki Tanimura said, eyes sparkling. If Kazuma were here, he'd definitely find her familiar: short hair, loves lewd stuff, deadpan expression. She was basically a parallel-world Virgo.
"Chiaki, not now," someone sighed.
"And Nene, you can't judge someone on rumors. You have to see them yourself."
"Once everyone recovers, we'll return to school. And if that teacher really is trash…"
Aoi raised her wooden sword and sliced clean through a huge stone beside her. The cut surface was smooth as glass.
Nene stared. "I've seen you do it before, but I still can't get used to it. Are you sure that's a wooden sword? It's not some high-tech weapon?"
A stone that big wouldn't split even with a real sword, yet Aoi cut it like tofu. It was terrifying. Even anime wouldn't go this far.
"Speaking of strong people, that girl Kagura from Gintama High is crazy strong. One punch and the ground cracked."
"Total monster strength. And Ayame Sarutobi? She throws kunai like bullets!"
"She's basically a ninja!" Yuka Hanazawa complained. Every group needed someone to comment on the absurdity, and that was her role here.
"Ninjago!" Chiaki chirped, mimicking ninja poses.
"Alright, enough. That's all for today." Aoi stood up. "I'm taking Kota out for a walk. Everyone head home early."
---
Elsewhere, in a rundown apartment building—
Tatsuya Himekawa had just received news about what happened at Ishiyama High.
Before he could react, trouble arrived at his door.
"Himekawa, you bastard. You always jump people when they're alone. Bet you never thought the day would come when you got surrounded."
A group from the Black Crow gang, a local yakuza outfit, had come to settle a score.
"Is that so? Funny, because from what I see, I'm the one with the numbers advantage. How much do you want to switch sides and work for me?" Himekawa gave a contemptuous smile as he looked over the group blocking his doorway.
"Switch sides?" the Black Crow leader spat. "Won't work. I don't care if you're some rich-boy heir to a megacorp. You crossed me, so you're dead meat!"
He lunged forward, but the moment he moved, the underlings behind him all exchanged strange looks.
A second later, the Black Crow leader hit the ground, knocked out cold. And the ones who struck him were his own men. Himekawa hadn't even lifted a finger.
"See? Money solves everything."
Himekawa looked down at the fallen leader with the calm superiority of someone who believed the whole world revolved around him. "People only chase profit. Give them enough cash, and even close 'brothers' will stab each other in the back."
"Money can do anything. And I happen to have plenty."
He grabbed the leader by the hair and hauled him back up. "Figure out a way to bring that new Ishiyama teacher to me. Whatever methods you need, take the funds from me. But finish the job. This is your last chance. Understand?"
"Y-yes!" the Black Crow leader stammered, instantly submissive. He realized now he'd picked a fight with something far scarier than any gang.
---
Meanwhile...
At Yurine Hanazono's home
"Yurine, I swear it wasn't me! I wasn't plotting against you, it was all Medusa's idea! I'm innocent!"
Jashin-chan's plan to use Medusa's petrifying gaze to turn Yurine to stone and get rid of her had failed spectacularly. Without a second of hesitation, she threw Medusa under the bus.
"Jashin-chan… that's mean." Medusa looked heartbroken, on the verge of tears.
"Hehe~"
"You think I'd believe that? Seriously?" Yurine smiled like a full-fledged witch, grabbed Jashin-chan, and hung her upside down to drain her like livestock.
"Medusa, has she always been this shameless?" Yurine asked while Jashin-chan dripped like a festive blood fountain.
Medusa nodded calmly. "Yes. She's been like this for thousands of years."
"Not a shred of improvement after millennia. Classic Jashin-chan." Yurine sighed.
"So, Medusa, what do you think of the human world?"
As she poured tea, Yurine sat beside her guest, the two of them enjoying the view of Jashin-chan's blood spraying like a decorative water feature.
"The human world is fun," Medusa said. "I was a bit nervous at first, but on the way here I passed a school that felt incredibly familiar. The decorations reminded me of our demon world."
"That's when I realized humans and demons really aren't that different."
She sat in a perfect formal kneel, fully relaxed now. Being around Yurine felt just like sitting with an old friend from home.
"A school like the demon world? Sounds fun. I'll have to visit it sometime," Yurine said.
— — —
But back at the school, Kazuma was dealing with a small problem.
"Here, please take the master to bathe." Hilda placed baby Beel into Kazuma's arms.
"Bathe him? Isn't that your job?" Kazuma blinked. No one told him that babysitting included bath duty. He'd never done this before.
"Isn't it natural for the father to do it?" Hilda replied.
Tohru enthusiastically nodded beside her.
"But giving a baby a bath feels like such a hassle…"
"Wait… hold on." Kazuma rummaged through his treasury, eventually pulling out a magic tool. "A cleaning gadget. Just press the button and it cleans off all dirt."
"You don't get the warm bath feeling, but it's a lot more convenient."
Holding Beel in one arm, he pressed the button. In an instant, both he and the baby were spotless, even giving off a faint floral scent.
"It auto-adjusts too. You can choose different scents," Kazuma added. "Like it, Beel?"
"Pa.. da." Beel sprawled out his limbs proudly, showing off his clean, soft, fragrant little self.
"This is an amazing tool," Hilda breathed. "Where did you buy it? The master hates baths. This would save me so much trouble."
"It's great, right? Not 9999, not 999, now only 99.9— cough, sorry, that line just slipped out." Old TV commercials had burned themselves into his soul.
"Alright, enough joking around. Let's go get dinner."
The group headed out. The school had a small shop, but it sold nothing but bread. Bread filled you up, sure, but it wasn't exactly delicious.
"No proper house… so shabby," Hilda muttered. "Our baby master used to live in a castle. Now he has to stay in a place like this. So pitiful."
Her eyes fixed sharply on Kazuma, basically telling him to buy a castle already.
"What's so great about a castle? One breath of dragon fire and it's gone," Tohru said. "I like our current place way more."
"Castle!"
"School!"
The two immediately started arguing.
Kazuma ignored them, carried Beel, and continued walking.
They had barely left the school gates when a group of men stormed toward them.
"Two blond girls, green-haired baby… that's him! That's our guy!"
"Grab him!"
The Black Crow goons charged, having identified Kazuma from the description they'd been given.
And then…
"Well, you're not students, so I can actually fight back all I want," Kazuma said cheerfully.
He didn't even bother moving. He just lifted his magic assault rifle and swept the whole area. They were Yakuza anyway — he could practically feel the blood on their hands. Guys with that look had definitely killed before.
Within seconds, only one man was left alive.
Shadow Soldiers reached out from the darkness and dragged the bodies away.
Kazuma strolled over, grabbed the survivor by the head, and lifted him up like a toy. "Alright. What do you want from me?"
"Shouldn't you ask that before killing everyone?" Hilda commented calmly.
"Not too late. I still have one alive," Kazuma replied.
He tightened his grip. Faced with death, the man instantly spilled everything he knew.
.
.
.