Hikigaya's grades in science weren't great, but his fundamentals were solid enough.
With Hiyori Shiina's tutoring, learning wasn't all that hard.
Lunchtime passed before they knew it.
"Even though it's good to focus on studying," Hiyori reminded gently, "you should still take breaks and relax sometimes."
She picked up a paperback and handed it to him. "I recommend this—The After-Dinner Mysteries by Tokuya Higashikawa. It's a lighthearted mystery; perfect for unwinding your brain."
Hikigaya wanted to tell her that, in his free time, he preferred reading light novels—titles like My Little Sister Can't Be This Cute, Saekano: How to Raise a Boring Girlfriend, or My Teen Romantic Comedy Is Wrong, As I Expected.
But when faced with Hiyori's bright, expectant eyes, all he could do was quietly accept the book.
"Oh, right. Let's exchange contact info."
Hiyori smiled and handed him her phone. "I don't really know how to work this thing… could you help me, Hikigaya?"
This feels oddly familiar…
"Sure."
He took her phone and opened the contacts list.
There was only one name: Ibuki Mio.
…This girl's social circle was tragically small.
After a few quick taps, Hikigaya added his number to her contacts and handed the phone back.
"Here—"
"Hm? What's wrong?"
Hiyori was staring at him intently.
"Hikigaya… you seem surprisingly skilled at this."
"Do you have… a lot of friends, by any chance?"
"Hell no," Hikigaya shot back instantly. "I'm in Class D. I don't even have a single friend I can go to the bathroom with."
And he wasn't exaggerating.
Bathroom companionship was, after all, one of the most vital forms of male bonding in modern student society.
Guys like Yamauchi didn't count, of course. But once, Hikigaya had actually invited one of the serious students—Yukimura Teruhiko—to the bathroom.
He'd been rejected on the spot.
The reason? Yukimura said he didn't associate with "unmotivated students."
Unmotivated?!
What kind of slander was that?
He spent almost every waking moment studying—during class, lunch, after school, even late into the night!
How was that "unmotivated"?
When he tried to argue, Yukimura had the nerve to accuse him of "spending all day flirting with girls."
What kind of idiot was spreading that rumor?!
"Hikigaya," Hiyori said, pressing a finger to her lips, "we might be friends, but… going to the bathroom together would still be a little awkward."
"Of course! That's strictly a same-gender activity!"
Hikigaya broke out in a cold sweat. Why the hell was he even talking about bathrooms with a girl?!
He should've gone with something classier, like "So, what's your opinion on the Middle East?" That sounded intellectual. Girls liked that sort of thing… right?
"Alright, I'll stop teasing you," Hiyori said, chuckling softly as she packed up her books.
At the library door, she turned back with a bright smile. "Oh, by the way, Hikigaya—"
"Don't forget to pay me in your dreams~"
***
Tap tap tap tap tap tap tap—
Hikigaya blinked, realizing his fingers were flying across a keyboard.
He was sitting in front of a computer, writing a novel titled Welcome to the Classroom of the Elite.
"So this time, I'm a light novel author?" he muttered, eyes lighting up.
Working from home—now that sounded like a solid career path!
He looked around. The room was unfamiliar.
Wait… was this another dream-wife scenario?
"Uwah~"
"Dear, you're up late writing again?"
From the bedroom emerged a silver-haired woman in pajamas, rubbing her sleepy eyes.
"!!!"
Hikigaya's pupils contracted.
Even though he'd already half-expected it, seeing her in person still sent his heart racing.
"Shi… Hiyori."
She really had invaded his dreams, just like she promised.
"Mhm~"
Hiyori wrapped her arms around his neck from behind, resting her chin on his shoulder.
"W–what are you doing…"
"Nothing~ Just felt like hugging you."
Her voice was soft, eyes half-closed in quiet contentment.
Hikigaya swallowed. "Hiyori, is there… something you want?"
He remembered her saying earlier that he'd have to "pay her in his dreams."
Maybe this was her subconscious following through.
"Nope~ I already have you, that's enough for me."
She hugged him a little tighter.
C-calm down!
This is a dream!
Just a hallucination!!
Don't lose it, man!!!
"J-just say something, anything…" Hikigaya stammered, desperate to repay his "dream debt" and banish her before he lost control.
"Anything?"
"Mm~ lemme think…"
Hiyori tilted her head playfully, pretending to ponder. "Then… how about you carry me to the bathroom, Hikigaya~?"
"…Huh?"
"What kind of request is that?"
"Ten years ago," she said with a teasing smile, "you invited me to the bathroom first~"
"That never happened! I said bathroom socializing is for guys only!"
"Oh~ so you remember?"
Of course he did—it was literally yesterday!
"Hmph~ I don't care~~ I still want you to carry me."
She switched to full-on spoiled mode, legs pressing together, fidgeting shyly.
"Hikigaya… you'd better hurry…"
"Otherwise, I might just pee on you~"
W–wait WHAT?!
Could you not?! At least use a euphemism like "watering the flowers" or something?!
This was Hiyori Shiina—calm, elegant, soft-spoken! Her character was falling apart before his eyes!
Ah yes—the age-old mystery of how people change after marriage.
Left with no choice, Hikigaya sighed and carried her to the bathroom.
A few moments later, she came out, face flushed bright red.
"That was a M-mistake… That was supposed to be one of those cute couple games… but it was so embarrassing!"
Hikigaya's expression turned complicated, his lips twitching as if trying to suppress a laugh. Somewhere deep inside… he might've discovered a new, questionable hobby.
"Well, uh… I actually thought it was kinda fun," he said carefully. "Maybe starting tomorrow, I can carry you every mor—mff?!"
Before he could finish, Hiyori clamped a hand over his mouth.
"P-please don't ever mention that again!"
Seeing her cheeks burn and her ears turn red only made Hikigaya grin wider. "No way. I'm holding this over you for the rest of my life."
"You jerk~!"
Her face went red as she blurted out, "If you keep talking, I—I won't make you breakfast tomorrow!"
"…Wait, what? Make me breakfast?"
"Shut up! You know what I mean!"
***
Freaky ahh dream