It was a quiet night at the duke's estate. The Duke was sitting alone in his study, while a pile of untouched paperwork sat on his desk. His thoughts, however, flew away far from work.
He found himself holding a small golden locket, one that was once belonged to Eveline. Inside was a portrait of her, smiling softly, her eyes filled with warmth and joy. He looked at her face, his jaw tightening as joyful past memories flooded back. Her laughter. Her voice calling his name while holding his hand and whispering, "Let's grow old together and have a big happy family"
But before that could happen she passed away.
"She promised," he whispered, his voice breaking slightly. "You said you wouldn't leave me, Eveline… You said we would raise our child together, but now... where are you?" He clenched the locket tightly in his hand until it sank a bit into his skin. "You said you'd stay with me... you said.."
For years, those words had been both his comfort and his pain. He built anger and grief around his heart until it formed a wall, thinking it would protect him and those memories, but instead, it made him lose everything, even neglecting the daughter Eveline left behind.
His gaze drifted toward the window. revealing the garden below, the same place where he'd last seen Ayana crying. Those same eyes that were teary used to be the eyes Eveline once had. That same face that looked afraid was the face Eveline had when she was alive, but it was joyful.
He felt heavy in his chest. Every time he saw Ayana, he told himself it was irritation, but now, he finally understood what it really was. Guilt.
He had blamed that tiny child for a pain she never ccaused. He'd looked at her and only seen what he'd lost.
He stood up and left his office. Slowly, he walked down the hallway, the echo of his footsteps following him. Then he found himself outside Eveline's old art room, untouched since the day she died. Eveline was fond of art, she would draw various stuff.
With a deep sigh, he opened the door.
Her piano sat by the window, paintings surrounded the room. His fingers hovered above the piano, trembling as He played a few soft notes, it was off-key, uneven, but the memories that filled it were hers. The piano she used as she hummed when she was pregnant with Ayana.
He sat down on the bench and let the sound of the piano fill the room. For a moment, he could almost see her there again, laughing softly, her hand rested on her stomach while saying, "She'll love my music and art too, just like you."
A bitter smile touched his lips. "Maybe she will, Eveline," he whispered. "I heard her hum while eating pastries… just like you, Eveline… just like you.."
The realization broke him. He trembled, his hands falling onto the keys as tears ran down his face. For years, he refused to cry, he believed tears made him weak. But now, for the first time in a long time, he allowed himself to show at least this much of how much pain he felt.
"I thought if I kept blaming someone else, it would hurt less… but it ddidn't." He buried his face in his hands. "I pushed her away, Eveline. I pushed our daughter away. The only piece of you I had left."
He took a deep shaky breath and looked up. "What would you think of me now?" he asked quietly. "Would you call me cruel? Unworthy?" The silence pained him. Why? why is he like this?
The Duke exhaled, as he thought for a long time and said. "No one was at fault, was there? Not you. Not me. No one." He finally said it out loud words that had been trapped inside him for years. And as soon as he did, his chest felt lighter, he finally felt at ease.
He stood up, walked up to the window, and looked toward the garden. The sun rose up, There He saw Ayana who was asleep on the bench, her small body curled up.
He remembered the last time he saw her, trembling, crying, her eyes full of fear. And yet, she still called him papa. Despite everything he'd done… she still saw him as her father. Even after years of abandonment and neglect.
"I don't deserve it," he whispered. "But maybe… I can try to become a better father."
For the first time, his heart felt at ease. The pain of the past was still there, but they no longer chained him down. He realized that if he wanted to help his daughter heal, he needed to start healing himself too
He left Eveline's room, the locket still in his hand, and made his way to Ayana who was still outside the garden. the faint sound of her quiet breathing reaching him. She had fallen asleep on the floor again, a blanket barely covering her.
The Duke kneeled beside her and carefully lifted her small body, "Why are you sleeping here...?" he mumbled as he sighed. Then he went abck inside carrying her all the way to her room, laying her gently on the bed. Ayana stirred but didn't wake up. He brushed a strand of hair from her face and whispered softly, "You've been through enough, Ayana… there would be no more nightmares. Not if im here with you" He stayed there beside her until work came.
He unclasped the locket and placed it beside her pillow. Inside was Eveline's portrait. "Your mother would've wanted us to be happy," he said quietly, more to himself than to her. Then he smiled, after that, he left to finish paperwork as the day continued as usual but this time the duke was determined to become a better father and provide a great future for his daughter, ayana as for his wife, Eveline will always remain in his heart.. until his last breath