Alex POV
"What the hell was that, Ivan? You could have—?"
I stumble upon him standing in the shower.
His back is turned to me. The faucet sends a curtain of water falling over his body, slicking through his white hair, carving paths over the defined muscles on his back. He has his hands raised over his head, placed against the wall to balance himself. My eyes trace his forearms, his biceps, his shoulders… I swallow, a hot knot forming in my throat.
I stand there and for an impossible long moment, I admire him. His body is perfect. The scars on his back, deep pinkish trenches, only add to his dangerous beauty. There's an image of a snarling wolf tattooed on his spine. I follow the line of his vertebrae down to the thin line that separates his toned buttocks, down, down, until I cover his thighs and his muscled calves, my eyes greedily eating every detail.
Fuck.
How long has this image haunted my dreams? How long have I secretly desired that those arms would hold me, that those fingers would rake through my hair, tenderly discovering every sensitive part of my skin?
I know I can't have it, but it only makes the ache between my legs burn even hotter.
Ivan turns to face me, and the heat burns in my cheeks. He's taller than me so I have to look up. I have to force myself not to gawk at his chest or his defined abs, and certainly not at his dick sitting placidly against his balls. I lick my lips, but it's the wrong thing to do. All I can think about is taking him in my mouth.
He watches me, unaware of my mental struggle. His dark eyes bore into mine, waiting. The air between us is charged with tension I can't define. I want to close the distance between us and smash my lips against his, to join every curve of my body against the curve of his.
But I can't. Because I'm my father's son. The Silverlight heir. My future is already determined. I'll find a mate. I'll have children. I'll lead my pack.
And Ivan … Ivan is just a bodyguard. Someone to give his life for mine so I continue to live.
If only things could be different. If only…
He clears his throat. I'm jolted back to reality.
"You could have killed him."
He nods.
"You shouldn't have done that."
He nods again.
"What you did was wrong. Don't … don't repeat it." My voice is shaky. "Understood?"
He cocks his head. He seems amused, but it's probably just me.
"Understood?"
He shrugs then nods again.
"Answer me."
He doesn't. He never does. He talks to everyone else. He speaks to my father. He tells jokes to my little sister. But he's never spoken a word to me. All my life, I've wondered if he hates me. Could it be possible he falls asleep to thoughts of burying a sword in me, just as I fall asleep to thoughts of burying something else in him?
I don't know. I can't know. I've seen Ivan risk his life to save mine. How can he protect me so fiercely if he hates me? Can devotion be motivated by anything other than love?
The door to the bathroom unlocks. I panic. Behind me, Ivan tenses. Our reactions are different. I'm afraid of anyone finding me here with Ivan because it would ruin my reputation. Ivan reacts like a warrior. The muscles in his legs tense, and he looks like he's about to spring to action.
We hear footsteps approach us. "Who's there?" I force out, voice shaky despite myself. Ivan doesn't say anything behind me.
"It's me, my prince. Sorry to startle you."
Out of the shadows emerges my father's advisor. Trellis.
The sight of the wizened old man immediately fills me with relief. Trellis has the kindest eyes I have ever seen in a person, and his voice is soft, almost melodious. I cover the distance between us and cover him in a bear hug. He smells like cookies and pastries.
"Trellis!" I can't contain my excitement. It's so great to see a familiar face after all these years away from my family.
"My prince," Trellis says, his voice filled with affection. "It is lovely to see you. How have you been?"
"Well, I hope. My dad pays too much to this damned school for it to be otherwise."
Trellis smiles. "Spoken like your father's son." His eyes find Ivan. His lips curl in distaste. I feel saddened.
Ivan ignores both of us, tying a towel around his waist. He leans against the wall of the bathroom and crosses his arms on his chest, watching me and Trellis. It quickly becomes awkward so I try to rescue the situation.
"Trellis. What's the matter? Why are you here?"
Trellis gives Ivan one last distasteful look before turning to me. "My prince, I fear that all is not well."
Fear grips my chest. Being alpha is about the most dangerous job in the world. Assassinations, takeovers, wars. In my father's era, the packs have managed to leave the worst of their evils in the past, in the dark ages. But every now and then, the past bites back with a ferocity.
I wait for Trellis to tell me that the worst has happened. That something has happened to my father. That a was has broken out. That Pack Silverlight is in danger.
"Your father will explain better," Trellis says.
Relief floods through me, weakening my knees. I let out a breath I didn't know I was holding in. My father. My father is safe. With him around, problems are never really as big as they seem. He's one man I know that can fix everything.
I nod. "We can start packing, Ivan and I. The journey should take a couple days, maybe a week, but we can cut time if we use wardstones to jump great distances."
Trellis shakes his head, smiling.
"You don't understand, my prince. Your father. He's outside. He's waiting for you."