Chapter 295: Views on Going Dark
At this moment, having finished all the words buried in his heart for years, the Third Hokage's office fell into complete silence. He quietly awaited Naruto's reaction, his aged eyes carrying tension and anticipation.
Though Jiraiya on the side felt that with Naruto's broad-mindedness he wouldn't be petty, until receiving a definite answer, his heart remained suspended as well.
"...Um," Naruto spoke, his tone carrying some puzzlement. "By this disappointment and resentment stuff you're talking about—do you mean I'd run off to become a missing-nin or something?"
Hearing this, the Third and Jiraiya's nerves instantly tensed even tighter. However, immediately after, Naruto showed a somewhat speechless expression and continued speaking.
"But, people don't really care that much about the opinions of things they're indifferent to. In that situation, if I didn't go save them, even I would look down on myself... Alright then." He waved his hand, tone relaxed.
"Old man, you can have a bit more faith in me." Naruto's face displayed that familiar smile again. "What I've felt in Konoha isn't all unpleasant stuff... Oh right, my Chunin Exam match got interrupted—do I still have hope of being promoted to chunin?"
Watching Naruto's grinning face, plus that final inquiry clearly meant to ease the atmosphere with its daily triviality... that massive stone weighing on the Third Hokage's heart for who knows how long finally landed with a "thud." The tremendous sense of relief even made his legs weak, almost collapsing backward into his chair.
He gazed at that face before him so similar to the Fourth Hokage's, yet also fused with Kushina's resilience and cheerfulness, his eye sockets growing slightly warm.
Yes... he is... after all that person's child...
"Naruto... thank you."
Hearing such a solemn apology, Naruto felt somewhat uncomfortable and scratched his face. "Yeah, well, it's nothing. Can I go now? I still have some matters to handle." His mind was currently full of issues regarding his mother Kushina—he was already somewhat impatient to research solutions.
As for what he'd just said about "being indifferent," that was naturally true. Naruto didn't consider himself that petty. He actually never quite understood why characters would become enraged enough to kill everyone or even destroy an entire village just because others insulted them a few times.
He couldn't help associating this with some sensationalized Naruto fanfiction titles he'd occasionally glimpsed—those so-called "dark Naruto" stories that claimed "decisive in killing," but what got written was "I don't eat beef."
As though the original Naruto, once aware of the plot, would inevitably walk toward extremism and destruction.
Even if he hadn't had Satsuki's companionship as a child, even if those villagers' behavior had been more excessive, at most Naruto would just completely give up and then find an opportunity to leave the village and live alone.
Naruto muttered inwardly. He thought of those widely circulated sayings—"The person who most should have become a missing-nin ultimately became Hokage."
Gaara—besides suffering ostracism, lived under constant life-threatening assassination attempts by loved ones. Nagato—parents died tragically before his eyes, wandered in warfare, nearly starved to death, witnessed his best friend die upon himself. Kakashi—father bore infamy and committed suicide, two teammates one dead one "traitorous," beloved teacher and teacher's wife both sacrificed, with Guy practically the only close friend still alive and well.
If really discussing tragedy, to go dark you'd need to at least reach the level of the above people, right?
Being bullied and insulted—you can hit back or curse back. Kill people? What is this, dark elementary schooler?
---
Consciousness floated in chaotic darkness, like struggling to wake from endless slumber, heavy drowsiness continuously eroding the edges of wakefulness like tides.
Kushina Uzumaki could feel that if she relaxed even slightly, gave up resisting, she'd immediately fall back into that unknowing, unfeeling sleep.
Merely organizing her thoughts, trying to understand her current situation, had already used all her strength beyond resisting drowsiness.
The final frame of memory froze at... herself being pierced through by the Nine-Tails' sharp, massive claw... intense pain, life rapidly draining... No, even without being pierced, as a jinchuriki, with the Tailed Beast extracted, death was already destined...
That day should have been the happiest day of her life, yet ultimately she could only hastily glimpse her just-born child in life's final moments before facing eternal separation...
And then?
Memory showed gaps. When consciousness revived again, flashing before her eyes was that face... that young face... Was it him?
That face carried unwillingness, bottomless sorrow, and intensely thick reluctance... The facial features' outline somewhat resembled herself, but the brows more closely resembled Minato...
But hadn't she already died? Why had she fallen into this current situation? The body's sensation... so strange, no real feeling, no pain sensation either...
"Right... Minato seemed to have told me about similar situations, dattebane..."
The muttering in her heart carried a strange verbal tic. Kushina Uzumaki struggled to search through chaotic memories. She recalled that previously, when Minato was researching the Flying Thunder God Technique, he seemed to have mentioned... on that forbidden jutsu scroll recording countless mysteries existed a taboo technique capable of letting the deceased return to the present world.
Of course, Kushina hadn't investigated deeply then. She only knew such a technique existed without understanding its specific principles. After all, who would want to learn that kind of technique disturbing life and death's order? But combining with current circumstances, apparently only this one possibility could explain things.
The body was bound by some power... This feeling was...
"This is the Eight Trigrams Seal?"
As an Uzumaki Clan bloodline inheritor and simultaneously a sealing technique master, Kushina immediately recognized this familiar binding sensation on her body.
In other words, after sacrificing with Minato that day, for some unfortunate reason, she'd been summoned out using forbidden jutsu... possibly even controlled to do something?
This thought made her heart tighten. So... that child, Naruto—was that why he showed such sad, such painful expression? To stop the controlled me?
In the interval between death and being summoned... no memories whatsoever, couldn't even sense time's passage—was that the sensation of souls remaining in the Pure Land? And now being able to think, able to perceive, meant her soul remained imprisoned in the present world, right...
She was already a dead person... shouldn't interfere with anything in the present world...
This rational thought clearly flashed through Kushina's mind. However, when she tried extremely slightly moving her fingers, feeling that long-absent "tactile sensation" even if based on a dust-constructed shell, an impulse from her soul's depths that couldn't be suppressed made her unconsciously want to move more.
He... how old is he now? Should... already be a youth, right...
Without parents by his side, these years... has he been lonely? Has anyone bullied him?
Has he eaten properly? Has he gone hungry? What does he like eating? Has his body grown strong?
Has he made friends? Is his personality gentle like Minato's, or a bit impulsive like herself?
Does he... hate us? Hate us for just abandoning him alone like this...
Questions, worry, guilt, and profound love instantly overwhelmed the rational dam about "shouldn't interfere with the present world" just established. That maternal, bone-deep concern overwhelmed everything in this moment.