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The sun was blazing.
Ethan shuffled lazily down the street, half-awake, letting his eyes wander over the scenery. Even though he'd just gotten up, the heat made him feel sleepy all over again.
Still, his body—powerful as it was—quietly absorbed the faint energy in the sunlight. It was a slow process, but steady, each beam of light fueling him just a little more.
He was lost in thought when a few drunk guys stumbled into view ahead. They were crowding around a woman—at least, apparently a woman. Ethan couldn't really see her face, but from the curves and the dress, she looked like she might be a beauty. She reeked of alcohol, swaying on her feet as the drunks laughed and pawed at her.
It was a rowdy scene. Ethan gave them a casual glance and kept walking. Just a bunch of ordinary people—no power, no threat. Not his problem.
But as he walked past, the "woman" suddenly lunged.
A flash of silver gleamed in her hand—no, his hand.
Thunk!
The blade struck Ethan square in the back.
"Hm?" Ethan didn't even move. He just turned his head, eyebrows raised. When he got a look at the attacker's face, he froze in surprise—not because the guy was hideous or beautiful, but because… it was a guy.
The "woman" was actually a man in disguise.
Ethan couldn't help but be a little impressed. The guy had really gone all in—cross-dressing, getting surrounded by a bunch of drunk creeps, letting them grope him all over. Ethan remembered one guy's hand buried in the guy's chest, another on his ass, another rubbing his thigh… he could even swear he'd seen one drunk's finger in his mouth.
"Wow," Ethan said, honestly impressed. "You're really committed. I mean, that's dedication. But… uh, why stab me? I don't remember ever meeting you."
The man's voice came out rough, twisted by a crooked grin. "Hahaha! No, we've never met. But I've got a special interest in you so-called heroes. I want to kill every last one of you…"
"Ohh, so you're the guy the Hero Association called about. The one attacking heroes lately."
"That's right! I'm one of them! You heroes piss me off—especially the weak ones! You kill monsters, sure, but then you start meddling in our business too. Think you can act all righteous and take us down? Hah! Time to show you what it costs to mess with us!"
Ethan sighed. "Ah, so you're just another lowlife from the underworld. Thing is, I've never even bothered with your kind. I leave you people alone, don't mess with your shady deals or anything."
"Too bad for you then," the man sneered. "Once the boss hears I killed Manga Superman, I'll be swimming in rewards!"
"No."
"What?"
"You can't kill me."
"…What did you just say?"
"I said," Ethan tilted his head, "even if I just stand here, that little toy knife of yours can't hurt me. Honestly, when you stabbed me, I thought it was a prank. Felt like a breeze—tickled, really."
The man gaped and looked down. The knife in his hand was bent. Despite being made of tough, razor-sharp metal, it hadn't even scratched Ethan's skin.
"Wha—how?! How the hell are you this strong?!"
"Why wouldn't I be?" Ethan sniffled suddenly. "Achoo!"
The sneeze echoed down the street.
That cheap perfume mixed with booze was way too strong—it had been stinging his nose since the guy got close. When he finally sneezed, it was with a bit more force than intended.
When he looked up again, the man was gone.
Ethan blinked, then glanced skyward—just in time to see a human figure flying through the air, getting smaller and smaller.
"Oh… oops." He rubbed his nose. "Guess I overdid it."
The guy hadn't been strong to begin with. For a normal human, getting hit by Ethan's sneeze was… well, fatal.
"Supercriminals, huh? They've even got teams now." He shrugged. "Eh, whatever. Not my problem."
"Mr. Ethan! Out for a stroll?"
He turned. It was none other than the Unlicensed Rider—again. Ethan had been running into him a lot lately.
"Oh, it's you. What happened? You look hurt." Ethan noticed the thick bandages on the Rider's arm.
"Yeah," the Rider admitted with a tired smile. "Those criminals are getting bolder—attacking heroes out in the open now. But I managed to capture one! Once we get him talking, we'll track down the rest of his group."
"Impressive as always, Unlicensed Rider. I actually ran into one too, but, uh… sneezed a little too hard."
"Oh? So he got away? Tough luck."
"No, I mean—he got blown away. Like, literally."
"…Ah."
There was a long pause.
Ethan grinned. "Anyway, keep it up, Unlicensed Rider. Honestly, I think you're the real kind of hero. Too bad I don't know how to train people properly—if I did, I'd totally help you power up."
"Thank you, Mr. Ethan! I might not have any special strength, but I'll never give up. I'll stay true to my path!" The Rider's eyes burned with determination.
"That's the spirit! Speaking of which, uh… my fridge at home got wrecked. Think you could pick up a new one for me? Maybe grab some groceries too? Here's the cash."
Before the Rider could answer, Ethan shoved a wad of bills into his hands and wandered off.
The Rider looked down at the money, smiling helplessly. He hadn't known Ethan long, but he'd already gotten a pretty good sense of what kind of person "Manga Superman" was—strong beyond reason, but utterly lazy.
Still, true to his word, when Ethan got home later, a brand-new fridge and fresh ingredients were already there. Ethan couldn't help but be impressed. Compared to Saitama, Unlicensed Rider was way more dependable. If he were stronger, Ethan would've asked him to move in next door. Neighbors helping each other out would've been really convenient.
After sending the repair crew away, Ethan was about to head inside when Saitama appeared, looking exhausted.
"Yo, baldy! How'd it go today? Any luck finding work?"
"Shut up—and don't call me baldy!" Saitama groaned. "There are too many heroes now. The missions get snatched up fast. Tomorrow's the last day of the week—I have to find something."
"Relax, Saitama. If you can't, I'll hook you up."
"Don't you dare." Saitama glared. He remembered all too well what "help" from Ethan meant—repairing toilets, unclogging drains, and worst of all, that one time he had to be some woman named Sister Feng's 'boyfriend' for an hour…
"..."
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