At dawn, I woke to a headache.
The disconnect between my mind and body after a hangover was excruciating.
"Hiss..." I cried, clutching my head.
"Awake?" A man's voice startled me, and I snapped my eyes open. I was met with Lu Yanchen's incredibly handsome face. He was a complete beauty stunner.
No, why was he in my bed?
I took a closer look. No, why was I in his bed?
I stepped back in shock, nearly falling off the bed. He grabbed my waist and pulled me back. I placed my hands on his chest and stammered, "Last night, I, we..."
He stared into my eyes. "You really can't remember anything?"
Seeing him like this, I was unsure. Did I do something I shouldn't have done last night?
But my mind was blank. I couldn't recall a single thing. I tentatively asked, "Did I... do something to you?"
"Yes," Lu Yanchen nodded, answering without hesitation.
My heart tightened, recalling the erotic dreams I'd had two nights before.
Though my body was only twenty, my mental age was twenty-eight.
Did I get drunk and act recklessly? What did I do to a powerless, disabled man?
I'm a beast!
No, I'm worse than a beast.
Trembling, I pulled back the covers and saw a large hickey on his exposed collarbone.
I bit my lip and asked cautiously, "Did I?"
Lu Yanchen hummed a low, sensual sound.
"What else did I do to you?"
"You vomited all over me, stripped me, and then..."
He left the rest of his sentence unfinished, yet it left me with a tantalizing thought. "I'm sorry, Yanchen, I was drunk last night." I rubbed my head, feeling like the scumbag who'd just pulled up his pants and walked off the next morning.
He, with a shy expression, snuggled under the covers. "It's nothing. We're already married, so even if we were actually married, it's perfectly normal."
My eyes widened. It was hard to imagine these words coming from the aloof Lu Yanchen.
"So we really..."
I didn't feel anything unusual physically. The only time I'd been with Lu Shiyan in my previous life was when we were drunk, and I woke up the next day feeling intensely unwell.
"No, I won't take advantage of someone's vulnerability." He looked at me with a burning gaze. "If I don't cooperate, you can't force me."
I finally breathed a sigh of relief and said, "My uncle, such a decent man, wouldn't do anything to me."
But the thought of myself, transformed into a slut after drinking, was too much for my eyes.
"Sorry, I didn't mean to do this."
He pulled me into his arms again. The morning heat in the covers rose, and we were both clad tightly in thin pajamas. "Wanwan, I'm a normal man. I actually have these needs, too," he suddenly said.
My face flushed instantly, and I almost bit off my tongue as I spoke.
"So, so..."
"I can wait for you."
His warm palm caressed my cheek. "But don't make me wait too long, okay?"
The sincerity in his eyes made me flustered, and I blurted out, "How did you manage before you got married? Haven't you ever had a woman before?"
"No," he told me firmly. "Not a single woman."
I was even more surprised. This shouldn't be the case. Since my uncle has this ability, even if he's disabled, there are always women who would throw themselves at him if he wanted.
He leaned close to my ear and whispered, "Do you want to know how men manage?"
He grabbed my hand, and my face flushed with shame.
"Yan, Yanchen."
"Baby, you called me husband last night."
What! Am I so unrestrained? I have no idea. Even after Lu Shiyan and I got our marriage certificate, I never called him "husband."
I was so frightened I couldn't move, and only then did he let me go.
"I, I'm going to the bathroom."
As I fled, I didn't notice the slight smile on the man's face behind me.
Closing the bathroom door, I scooped up cold water and splashed it on my face, trying to dispel the burning sensation.
But no matter how I washed, the same feeling seemed to linger on my hands.
It was even more profound and distinct than the fleeting feeling I'd had the last time.
I looked at myself in the mirror, tears welling in my eyes. My red lips were slightly swollen.
I must have swollen my lips when I bit his collarbone. I'm not human.
I looked up at the shower stall, and an image flashed through my mind.
Two naked people kissing passionately under the steamy showerhead.
It's over, it's over. I'm never drinking again. I'm hallucinating. I lingered inside for nearly an hour before leaving. When I emerged, Lu Yanchen was already dressed and had breakfast prepared.
I couldn't look him in the eye, afraid he'd notice my awkwardness.
He held out his hand. "Come here."
Confused, I gave it to him.
He led me to a seat beside him, his expression as calm as ever. "Did you get scared?"
Guiltiously, I stared out the window. "Yes, a little uncomfortable."
"It's okay. You'll get used to it after a few touches."
I whipped my head around to look at him. Was this the man I knew?!
What were he saying? "You..." I was so surprised I was speechless.
He then pulled me into a hug. I was so frightened I felt like a puppet. "Why are you shy? I'm your husband. It's only natural for us to be intimate. You were much more passionate last night."
I couldn't help but blush again. "I, I don't remember."
"Wanwan, I won't force you, but don't push me away either. Let's take it slow, okay?"
I wasn't sure what he meant by taking it slow.
Is it about love?
After this failed relationship with Lu Shiyan, I probably won't trust men again in my life.
"Sorry, I might not be able to respond to you," I said seriously. "I won't love anyone anymore."
He gently stroked my cheek. "No, I'm talking about the intimacy between husband and wife."
I looked at him, puzzled, as he took my hand, his thick fingers weaving slowly between mine, interlocking them.
He leaned close to my ear, his warm breath washing over me.
"Wanwan, if you don't want to talk about love, how about trying just sex? You're a woman, you probably have needs too."
I hadn't figured out how to respond to his blunt words. The next second, his lips covered mine, "Baby, like this..."