Tie Tuo Wang came over brandishing his spiked club.
Long Aotian caught one glimpse of that weapon and instantly panicked.
"I… I'm done for… I can't take it anymore… I-I-I… Because of the Face-Swapping Technique, I've got no true qi left! You can't do this—!"
"Still talking tough, huh? Playing the hard man? Didn't eat enough? Itching for a beating, are you?"
Tie Tuo Wang unleashed another barrage, but even he was soon exhausted, slumping to the side, panting heavily.
Xu Xuejiao stepped forward again. "Mhm, mhm, got it, Brother Chengwen. I'll tell him."
She turned to Tie Tuo Wang. "Our Brother Chengwen says he's got the Invincible Diamond Body, forged in the Eight Trigrams Furnace of Tai Shang Lao Jun for seven times seven, forty-nine days! He's eaten the Peaches of Immortality, drunk the Imperial Wine, stolen the Elixir of Immortality, and munched on Ginseng Fruit! Your pathetic little stick? To him, it's just an ear pick!"
Tie Tuo Wang slammed the table. "Damn it! A true tough guy!"
His four lackeys raised their thumbs in unison. "A real hard man!"
Leng Qingqiu let out a sudden cold laugh.
Han Yue blinked. "Boss Leng, what's so funny?"
"Seven times seven isn't forty-nine."
Han Yue was floored. "That's what you're focused on?"
After another round of pummeling, Tie Tuo Wang was utterly spent.
He sat down, trembling all over. "What a hard nut to crack! No wonder he had the guts to deceive even me!"
Xu Xuejiao leaned close to the now-unconscious Long Aotian, pretending to whisper. "Oh, oh, got it, got it, I'll pass it on."
She turned back to Tie Tuo Wang. "Our Boss Lu says you're a sissy with no strength at all. He even asked if you have to sit on the toilet to pee."
Even Lu Chengwen, listening from the sidelines, felt his heart skip a beat.
Lu Chengwen, Leng Qingqiu, and Han Yue all thought in unison: That's ruthless!
Xu Xuejiao was practically ensuring Long Aotian's demise!
Tie Tuo Wang stood up, glancing over. "Miss Xu, you're sure that's what Lu Chengwen said?"
"Absolutely. I never lie."
Tie Tuo Wang pointed at "Lu Chengwen." "He… can still talk?"
Indeed, could he? Long Aotian was out cold, slumped in a corner, motionless. Everyone suspected he was already done for.
At that moment, Lu Chengwen carefully checked his reflection in a mirror and stepped out.
"Tie Tuo Wang."
The moment Tie Tuo Wang saw "Long Aotian," he dropped to one knee. "Young Master!"
"You've finally wised up, haven't you?"
"Thanks to the strategist's reminder, I realized I'd been deceived by this scoundrel. Fortunately, I've reflected and seek to make amends."
"Good. Han Yue, bring the contract for the shantytown project. Have him sign it."
Han Yue stared at "Long Aotian," utterly baffled.
What kind of plot twist is this!?
Did Leng Qingqiu and Long Aotian team up to have Young Master Lu beaten to death?
This was straight out of a drama—Pan Jinlian and Ximen Qing conspiring to murder a husband!
Wait… what contract? The shantytown project!?
Everything was spiraling into chaos!
Leng Qingqiu shot her a look. "What are you standing there for? Do as Boss Long says."
"Oh, y-yes, yes!"
Tie Tuo Wang signed the contract and transferred the funds without hesitation.
As he left, he kept apologizing to Lu Chengwen. "Mr. Long, I messed up before. My deepest apologies."
"It's fine, it's fine."
"If you have any orders in the future, just call me. I'll leave you my number."
"Got it, got it. Off you go."
Tie Tuo Wang thought to himself, Alright!
Judging by the Young Master's attitude, he wasn't angry anymore.
The harder he'd beaten Lu Chengwen, the happier the Young Master seemed.
His earlier mistake was forgiven—what a relief for giving Lu Chengwen a thrashing with his ultimate move!
Heh! I'm pretty clever, aren't I?
As Tie Tuo Wang and his men headed out, he passed Leng Qingqiu. "Mr. Long is a god among men!"
Leng Qingqiu forced a smile and nodded.
Passing Xu Xuejiao: "Young Master Long is as dashing as a jade tree in the breeze!"
"Yeah, yeah, got it."
Passing Han Yue: "Working with him is an honor."
Han Yue gave an awkward smile.
At the door, Tie Tuo Wang waved. "No need to see me out. Goodbye."
Just as Lu Chengwen was about to speak, a graceful figure crashed through the window, scooped up Long Aotian, and vanished through the opening. The girls screamed in fright.
Lu Chengwen rushed over and spotted a thin wire hanging from the windowsill. No question—it was Hua Xuening.
Lu Chengwen gave a wry smile.
The protagonist, huh? Always turning disaster into fortune, surviving against all odds.
Leng Qingqiu gasped. "Brother Chengwen, your face…"
"What about it?"
"It's back to normal!"
Lu Chengwen checked his phone's reflection. Sure enough, his face had reverted.
"So, if you beat him senseless, his weird technique fails fast. My own face feels so much better."
Xu Xuejiao grinned excitedly. "Hehe, you're getting more and more interesting, changing faces like that! I was actually really worried that was the real you, you know? I kept checking up close, and only when I saw Leng Qingqiu staying so calm did I dare to provoke him."
Lu Chengwen sighed.
[Heh, great. Now I've really done it.]
[Long Aotian, the chosen one, obviously won't die. But I got him beaten to a pulp and swindled fifty billion out of him. If anyone's going to die, it's me.]
[This kind of scam can't last forever. It'll get exposed eventually.]
Lu Chengwen was dejected. "Alright, you guys fend for yourselves from now on. I'm exhausted. I'm going home."
"Hey, don't go! We won big today—let's celebrate!"
"Sorry, Xuejiao, I'm not in the mood."
"Come on! I know Long Aotian's got a powerful background, but I think you're way more handsome than him."
Lu Chengwen gave a bitter smile. "Handsome? What's that worth? Handsome guys are just cannon fodder to make the protagonist look good and satisfy the audience's urge to see rich pretty boys get crushed."
"Why do you sometimes say things I totally don't get?"
"If you don't get it, that's about right. I'm out."
Lu Chengwen called Zhao Gang. "Zhao Gang, I'm at Qianfeng. Come pick me up."
In the back of the van, Lu Chengwen couldn't muster any joy.
To save Leng Qingqiu, he'd not only thoroughly pissed off the big-shot protagonist Long Aotian but also got him beaten to a pulp with multiple fractures.
Now, Leng Qingqiu and Xu Xuejiao were completely attached to him. Whether they stuck to him or not didn't matter—what mattered was that they now utterly despised Long Aotian.
Lu Chengwen was in awe of Long Aotian's sheer incompetence.
Useless! You're absolutely useless!
Can't even handle something this simple, relying on disguise tricks to scam girls! And you got caught! And you still failed!
My God! Is there a dumber protagonist than you?
But then he thought about it. If it weren't for him, everything would've followed the original plot.
In the end, it was Lu Chengwen using the system's tools and his unique knowledge of this world—secrets no one else knew—to repeatedly trip up Long Aotian.
To survive, I have to change the story's course.
But the moment I change the story, the protagonist hates me, the girls dislike him and like me instead, and then I'm doomed.
There's no solution.
No way out.
Lu Chengwen sighed. "Zhao Gang, why aren't you driving?"
Just then, the car door slid open, and Xu Xuejiao hopped in.
"What now?"
"Leng Qingqiu said you two took a bath together. Is that true?"
"Yeah, we did. So what?"
Lu Chengwen said it on purpose.
"Oh." Xu Xuejiao pouted. "You two teamed up to mess with me, didn't you?"
"What do you want?"
"Why are you always so harsh with me?"
"It's just how I am. Get out and go home. Stop wandering around."
"Hey! I've been helping you out left and right. When you need me, I play along. When you don't, you tell me to scram! Do you know that hurts my feelings?"
"Oh? You have feelings?" Lu Chengwen clapped mockingly. "Then go home and cry about it."
He opened the door. "Out."
Xu Xuejiao plopped into the boss chair beside him, crossing her arms and legs. "I'm not going."
Lu Chengwen's frustration flared. "Get out!"
"Nope! I've noticed you're kind of a freak—nice one minute, mean the next. Are you just toying with me?"
"I'm as good as dead, you get that? For Leng Qingqiu, I've burned all my bridges! I'm begging you, stop clinging to me, or I'm really done for! Please, just go!"
Xu Xuejiao stared at him. "Fine! You dare treat me like this!"
"Oh yeah? What're you gonna do?"
Still in the boss chair by the door, she crossed her legs again. "Help! Assault! Rape! Lu Chengwen's assaulting me! Rape!"
Lu Chengwen gritted his teeth and slammed the door shut. "How can you be like this? Saying stuff like that so casually?"
"Yup! I'm rebellious, didn't you know?"
Lu Chengwen's forehead was sweating. "You… you're a girl. Can you not throw around words like that? When you were messing with Long Aotian, saying stuff like 'sitting to pee'—can you watch your image?"
Xu Xuejiao suddenly looked pitiful. "Do you hate me?"
Lu Chengwen groaned. "Not exactly, but we haven't talked in years. You used to find me annoying. Just because I did a couple of good things recently, you're suddenly glued to me? That makes no sense!"
Xu Xuejiao grinned. "Alright, how about this: you drink with me. Get me drunk, and I'll never bother you again."
"You're insane!"
Xu Xuejiao rolled down the window. "Help! Assault! Rape! Help—"
Lu Chengwen yanked the window shut. "Fine, we'll drink! Let's go! I'm all in!"
They sneaked back to his place, where Lu Chengwen set up some snacks on his small balcony and had Zhao Gang deliver some good liquor. They raised their glasses.
Lu Chengwen said, "Deal's a deal. If I outdrink you, you leave me alone!"
"A gentleman's word is his bond."
"Cheers!"
Three hours later, Lu Chengwen was cackling nonstop. Xu Xuejiao was sprawled in his lap, one arm around his neck, the other clutching a bottle. "…My parents think I'm a good girl, haha! They don't know I've got a tattoo!"
"Really? Where? I can't see it!"
"Of course you can't! It's in a very secret spot!"
"Haha, how secret?"
"You wanna see?"
"Yeah."
"Not showing you! Haha!"
Lu Chengwen raised his glass. "That Long Aotian, what's he got? If he weren't the protagonist, I'd crush him in a second!"
"You're way more handsome than him."
"Of course! I'm the villain! Villains are always hot—set up to satisfy everyone's urge to see rich pretty boys get wrecked!"
"Hahaha, cheers, cheers! If you outdrink me, I'll show you my tattoo!"
"Oh?" Lu Chengwen's face was flushed, his grin sly. "It's a deal!"
…
The next morning, Lu Chengwen's head was pounding.
He rubbed his temples, sat up, and immediately sensed something was off. Turning to his side, he nearly died of shock.
Xu Xuejiao lay there, her body draped seductively across the velvet blanket, her legs impossibly alluring.
[Damn it! Again!? How much did I drink?!]
_
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