The truth of the past seized my gaze.It had already become the past…Yet, even so, the precious memory that would never be erased from my mindrefused to release my sight.
My heart ached and burned with pain.From my eyes, tears were already flowing down like a waterfall.I wanted to return—but I could not.
However, even being able to look at those precious memoriesthrough the Dream Rift itself was a blessing to me.
[Let me ask again. Do you not wish to return?]
The being, still unseen to me,spoke with a voice filled with great power.The voice was neither that of a man nor a woman.
I had long since lost both the strength to resist and the will to refuse.All I could do was gaze upon the memories of the pastand once again, slowly nod my head.
"I wish to return."
[You could have prevented all of this.]
Those words echoed through my mind like thunder.But I could not understand their meaning.What did he mean? When? How—?No image came to mind.
No matter how many times I thought about it, again and again,I could not grasp what he meant.In the end, I answered with silence.
[Why did you refuse?]
He asked again.And I was forced to think once more.There was not a single reason I should have to hear such a questionfrom a being who would not even reveal itself.So once again, I answered with silence.
[You do not remember? Then I shall show you myself.]
It happened in an instant.In the blink of an eye, the world split apart.All color vanished,and another memory flooded in.
It was before the war began—the dawn when I first met Leana, the Saint of Beldoras.
I had been preparing for the final field examinationto become a High Knight of Beldoras.It was long past the time to rest, deep into the night,and in the silent, empty training ground,I was swinging my sword alone.
And then, Leana came to me.
[Do you remember now?]
Only then did everything make sense—why he had asked me, "Why did you refuse?"The reason lay within this very moment.
I loved my homeland, Beldoras, more than anyone.I wanted it to grow stronger—to become the greatest and most perfect kingdom on the continent of Karbanis,an absolute nation that none could rival.
That day, Leana made me an offer—a single proposal that could have changed the fate of our kingdom.But I refused it.
She pleaded until she could no longer stand,but I did not yield even a single step.Even as I saw the sorrow in her eyes,I rejected her offer to the very end.
And in the end—I became a High Knight,and afterward, I fled from my homeland, Beldoras.
I could no longer see the momentwhen Saint Leana had made her proposal.So I lowered my head and tried to close my eyes.
But before I could,the scene changed again.
A darkness deeper than any light appeared before my eyes.Like a sinner trapped in emptiness,I began to regret rejecting Saint Leana's proposal.
Knowing that it was a past I could never undoonly tore my heart apart even more.
From my eyes, heavy tears fell—unable to bear their own weight.I regretted it.If I could, I wanted to return to that moment—the moment when Saint Leana made her proposal to me.
If only I had not refused her—if only I had accepted—how many times had that thought echoed in my mind?
"Do I still… have a chance?"
The unseen being remained silent and did not answer.But even though I knew it was impossible,I asked again, as if begging for my life.
"I want to know… if there is any chanceto return to the moment when Saint Leana made her proposal."
No matter how long I waited,the answer I wanted never came.Only silence stretched on endlessly.
It was pitiful. It was shameful.But all of this was becauseI had refused Saint Leana's offer.
A pain like my chest being torn apart consumed me.What I felt was not mere regret—it was guilt.
Because I had rejected her,countless lives were lost.That truth, that reality, crushed me completely.
[Ha ha ha… how pathetic. A sinner burdened by his own sins.]
The being that had ignored all my pleasfinally laughed—mocking me.
[You cannot endure it, can you?]
My whole body trembled.But I was powerless—utterly helpless to do anything.
And so, I sank even deeper into misery.
The growing weight of emotion pressed down upon me.Unable to endure it any longer,I collapsed to the ground, clutching my chest, screaming.
Even now, as I wept in agony—beyond the Dream Rift, in the real world—the war continued endlessly because of my choice,and the innocent kept dying.
The guilt and sorrow I felt for themonly made me cry harder.
As I cried out in pain,the scene changed once more.
The sound of waves filled the air—a ceaseless sea.
And then, the being who had never revealed itselffinally appeared before me.
She wore a pure white dressthat would not allow even a single speck of dust.Her hair was transparent, shimmering like glass.She was so beautiful, so divine,that even Saint Leana could not compare.
She reached out her handand gently stroked my head as if to comfort me.When her warm and soft touch reached me,the turmoil within my heart quieted,and at last—peace returned.
The cool sea breeze blew,embracing both her and me.
"Even though you know it's impossible,you keep asking.Is it because it brings peace to your heart?"
The one who had given me peace asked.I should have answered,but I could not speak a single word.
[Foolish Sinbearer.Why are you all the same?]
Sinbearer?Come to think of it,ever since I arrived in this world—the Dream Rift—she had been calling me by that name, not my own.
What was this Sinbearer?And what did it have to do with me?Why did she keep calling me that,instead of my real name—Kaelian?
Feeling a sense of calm from her touch,I looked into her eyes.
The moment our eyes met,I felt my soul begin to heal.For within her gazewas a purity so radiant and sacredthat it felt as if even the darkest of demonscould be purified by it.
I met her gaze without hesitation.
"My name is Kaelian," I said firmly.
Then, gathering my courage,I spoke again, confidently meeting her eyes.
"I don't know what 'Sinbearer' means,but please don't call me that."
The moment I finished speaking,a strange power entered her eyes.Was she angry?Her brow furrowed.
[You really have no manners.I tried to be kind to you, and you dare talk back?]
"Ugh…!!"
She suddenly grabbed my hair with one handand began dragging me somewhere.
[Follow me, you insolent Sinbearer.]
Even though I was a man,her strength was as heavy and unyieldingas a moving fortress.Helpless before her power,I was forcibly dragged away,and the scene began to change once more.
She grasped my head with demonic strength and began to take me somewhere.
Now she was dragging me forward—
through a corridor that stretched endlessly into the darkness.
The walls of the corridor shimmered faintly,
as though the world itself was alive and breathing.
Her grip did not loosen.
No matter how I struggled, I could not resist her power.
At the end of the corridor,
another darkness awaited us.
But this darkness—
was vast and without end.
And within it… there were lights.
Stars, scattered like jewels, gleaming from afar.
Far away, something shone brightly—
a great sphere of fire, and another, pale and soft.
The sun… and the moon.
My breath caught in my throat.
This was the first time I had ever seen such a thing.
And yet, I could not look away.
Carefully, I asked,
"Where… are we?"
She looked at me with a faint smile.
"Here?" she said.
"This place is called the universe."