The moment the panda head settled into place, the "distinctly unpleasant-faced" Masao vanished, replaced by a perfectly round and endearing panda.
(Masao: Hey! Who are you calling 'distinctly unpleasant-faced'?!)
"Perfect," Fujiwara Chika declared, clapping her hands together as she admired her handiwork. "Everyone, look! It's Panda Masao!"
His sturdy build filled out the costume far better than Chika's slender frame ever could, transforming him into a cuddly, if somewhat oversized, panda.
"Isn't he adorable?"
"Super adorable."
Whether it was the complete obscurity of Masao's actual face or the magical charm of the panda suit itself, the last traces of wariness in Fujiwara Moeha and Shirogane Kei evaporated.
They crowded in close, their eyes sparkling. Even Yukinoshita's gaze had softened, her usual cool demeanor replaced by a look of such open fondness it was practically spilling over.
Inside the stuffy suit, surrounded by four admiring girls, Masao felt a wave of pure triumph.
'Heh. I knew it. I'm irresistible. Wait… who's patting my stomach?'
Had his face been visible, the smug, lecherous grin stretching from ear to ear would have shattered the illusion instantly.
Peering through the limited vision of the mesh screen, he identified the culprit standing before him. His earlier hypothesis was correct: when dealing with a dedicated cat-lover like Yukinoshita Yukino, embodying a feline-adjacent creature was a guaranteed path to her heart.
After all, a panda was basically a cat. At least in spirit.
"Yukinoshita, what are you doing?" he asked.
Caught red-handed, Yukinoshita's cheeks flushed a delicate pink. She coughed, a little too formally. "I'm… just checking the quality of this material."
"Really?"
"Of course."
"So what do you think of the 'quality of this material'?"
She withdrew her hand, ignoring his question, putting on a serious face. "Masao-kun, I think you should call off the diet. Honestly, you could probably afford to gain a few more pounds."
"Yukinoshita, are you even listening to yourself?" Masao said, his voice dripping with mock horror. "This is sabotage! You're trying to lead me astray! Do you know how hard it was to start this journey for me? The sweat and tears… you've seen it all and yet you still suggest that!"
He launched into a full-blown dramatic speech, scolding her like she'd committed a cardinal sin.
Ashamed, Yukinoshita looked down. A pang of guilt hitting her.
How could she be so selfish, trying to ruin his progress just because she wanted a cuddlier panda? It was awful.
"You're right," she said, her voice firm with new resolve. "That was wrong of me. To make up for it, starting tomorrow, I'm putting you on a much tougher training schedule."
Masao's triumphant mood crashed and burned.
'That is NOT what I was going for! After that awesome speech, you're supposed to feel bad and go easy on me! How did you get 'more pain' from that?!'
"Ahem! Yukinoshita, you don't have to go that far. Really, just feeling bad is enough. We've got to be careful about overdoing it, you know? Slow and steady wins the game."
Fujiwara Chika, who had been watching the exchange with glee, burst out laughing.
"Haha! So the great Tanaka Masao is scared after all! I knew you two met because Yukinoshita-san was whipping you into shape, but I never got the full story."
"Let me explain," Masao said, jumping on the chance to change the subject. He gave them the rundown on the Service Club—Yukinoshita's own club for helping people with their problems.
Chika's eyes lit up like he'd just shown her a hidden treasure.
"There's a club like that? That's so cool! I wanna make one too! But with the student council…" Her face fell, genuinely torn.
Then, she perked up.
"Oh! I know!" she exclaimed, practically bouncing. "The student council helps people too! We could set up a special time for it! It'd be the best if they were love problems!"
She was already daydreaming, picturing herself as the school's number one romance expert.
"Hey, Yukinoshita-san, you have to call me if you get a request, okay? Especially a request about love! I'll totally help!"
Listening to this, Masao couldn't help but snicker.
If things were anything like the original story, Yukinoshita's next real client was probably a year away. He was basically her only customer.
"Masao-kun," Yukinoshita's voice cut in, sharp and knowing. "What's so funny?"
"Nothing, nothing," he replied casually. "Just thinking about when you'll finally get a juicy romance case. I could lend a hand."
Yukinoshita immediately got the dig—he was making fun of her empty client list.
"Don't worry about it. Too many requests can be a nuisance. I'm perfectly focused on my current, ongoing project." Her smile was sweet, but her eyes were pure menace.
Their chat drew a small crowd, and soon a few other girls came over to take photos with the unexpectedly popular panda.
For a glorious, delusional moment, Masao bathed in the feeling of being genuinely wanted.
—
Meanwhile, in the actual panda enclosure...
Guided by a keeper, Shinomiya Kaguya, now dressed in special gear and smelling like disinfectant, stepped into the real panda's space.
The creature was super calm. With the keeper's okay, Kaguya reached out and petted its thick fur, even feeding it a snack.
She didn't really care that much about pandas, but the thought of Chika being jealous sent a thrill of satisfaction through her.
'See, Fujiwara-san? Look at me now. I'm hanging out with the panda you love so much. You're probably up there, looking with envy.''
A smug smile on her face, Kaguya gracefully looked up to the viewing area where her friends should have been.
What she saw was her whole group, huddled around a cheap-looking panda costume and having a great time. Not a single one was looking her way.
Shinomiya Kaguya: "…"
'The panda is really great,' she told herself. 'I'm here with the real thing. They're just messing around with a fake. This is… totally fine. I'm not lonely at all.'
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