Chika Fujiwara arrived at the zoo with her younger sister, Kei Shirogane and Kaguya Shinomiya in tow.
A flicker of disappointment passed through Kaguya at the absence of Miyuki Shirogane, but it vanished the moment she laid eyes on his sister, Kei. A new resolve hardened within her.
[Today's Mission: Win over Kei Shirogane.]
Unbeknownst to them, another figure moved through the crowds: Hayasaka Ai, operating undercover.
Her disguise today was that of a harmless, cute schoolgirl—a world away from the sharp-tongued gal persona she wore at school.
'Sometimes, I really do envy these zoo animals. They live a life of leisure, waiting on hand and foot… Wait a second... Doesn't that describe Kaguya-sama's life, with me as her caretaker?'
'So, in a way, am I Kaguya-sama's keeper?'
The thought was so absurd that Hayasaka's gaze toward Kaguya shifted, a new, almost maternal glint in her eye.
'Heh. What a troublesome pet I've raised.'
A strange sense of pride washed over her, lifting her spirits considerably.
"Kaguya-chan, what's your favorite animal?" Chika's cheerful voice cut through her strategic planning.
Kaguya's thoughts was sharp and clear:
'I like any animal that resembles the President. Your dog, Pesu, for instance.'
Naturally, she would never voice such a thing aloud.
"I don't have a particular preference," she replied with practiced coolness.
"Eh? Really? How can you not have a favorite?" Chika exclaimed, as if this were a profound character flaw. "I love them all! Cats, dogs, anything cute and fluffy!"
She spread her arms wide in an enthusiastic, all-encompassing gesture—a motion that unfortunately also served to accentuate her own generous proportions.
Kaguya observed the display with icy detachment.
'How typical, Fujiwara-san. Your taste in animals is as broad and undiscerning as your... chest. Such fickleness is unbecoming. Devotion is the true mark of quality.'
She assured herself that she felt not a single pang of envy.
"Kei-chan, is there an animal you'd like to see?" Chika asked, pivoting seamlessly.
"If it's alright, I'd like to see the pandas," Kei Shirogane answered.
The Shirogane family's budget was tight, and Kei often spent her free time working. A trip to the zoo was a rare luxury.
She'd only agreed to come because Chika had spare tickets and the group included Moeha and Shinomiya, making it feel less like a charity case.
The panda, a creature she knew only from pictures, held a particular allure for her.
"Then it's settled! To the pandas we go!" Chika declared, thrusting a triumphant fist into the air and marching forward like a general leading her troops.
"Fujiwara-san," Kaguya interjected, not even bothering to look up from the large map she was studying. "You're going the wrong way. The Panda Pavilion is in the opposite direction."
"Eh? It is?" Undaunted, Chika simply offered a goofy grin, executed a perfect about-face, and resumed her march. "Onward!"
'What an airhead. Is this the price of that... volume? A trade of intellect for physical abundance? I, for one, made the superior choice. A sharp mind is the most attractive asset one can have.'
Satisfied with her own logic, Kaguya's heart felt lighter, and she gracefully followed after the pink-haired whirlwind.
She was blissfully unaware that this very conviction would be shattered in just two days' time.
—
Meanwhile, on the other side of the zoo, Masao and his two companions had already secured a prime viewing spot at the Panda Pavilion.
Having set out at 7 a.m., it was now nearly 9 a.m. They had expected a crowd, but the enclosure was surprisingly quiet, allowing them an unobstructed view.
"So that's a panda?" Jahy mused, her chin propped on the guardrail. "It looks so lazy. Pathetic."
"Right?" Masao agreed with a nod. "It reminds me of a certain someone lazing around on the sofa after a meal."
"Who are you calling pathetic?!" Jahy snapped, whirling on him with teeth bared.
"Shhh!" Yukinoshita hushed them immediately. "Look, it's about to eat."
Jahy stared skeptically at the thick bundle of bamboo in the panda's paws. "Does it eat bamboo? That stuff's practically wood. How does it even chew it?"
She spoke from experience; one of her many failed weapon inventions had been a bamboo pole proudly dubbed the "Masao-Smasher." Its only real success had been in boomeranging back as the "Jahy-Smasher." The memory of its hardness was still fresh.
"Of course they can," Yukinoshita explained, her voice taking on a lecturing tone. "Bamboo contains a significant amount of starch, which provides them with energy. Furthermore, their digestive systems have evolved specifically to process cellulose."
"I see, I see," Jahy nodded, her expression one of profound understanding. In truth, only one piece of information had stuck: Bamboo is edible.
'Bamboo does smell kind of fresh... maybe I should try some later.'
She watched intently as the panda grimaced, straining to snap a thick stalk of bamboo.
"Looks like tough work," she commented.
Yukinoshita frowned slightly. "That is unusual. An adult panda should be able to break that with ease. I wonder if it's unwell?"
The "Yuki-pedia" had reached its limit. It was time for "Masa-pedia" to log in.
Masao adjusted his glasses, the lenses flashing with a knowing light. "It just so happens I know the reason for that."
After a deliberate pause to ensure he had both their attention, he continued. "The panda isn't in pain. It learned that expression by watching its zookeepers."
"Learned it?" Jahy scrunched her nose in confusion.
But Yukinoshita, now equipped with the key variable, solved the equation instantly.
"Pandas are intelligent mimics. The zookeepers must make that face when they struggle to break the bamboo for them, and the panda simply copied the mannerism. Is that it?"
"Precisely. As expected of Yukinoshita, your deduction is flawless," Masao praised.
A faint, genuine smile touched Yukinoshita's lips. "You're quite knowledgeable yourself, Masao-kun. I must admit, I'm impressed."
Hearing that "Masao-kun"—a title that felt earned rather than merely given—sent a wave of pure elation through him.
He had finally decoded the subtle hierarchy of her addressing him. Neutral "Masao-kun" was his default state.
The cold, drawn-out "Masao... kun" meant he had been demoted to the level of a germ.
But this, the appreciative "Masao-kun," was a promotion to a fully recognized human being.
'Knowledge truly is power!'
As Masao and Yukinoshita fell into a deeper discussion about panda behavior, a familiar, buoyant voice chirped from nearby.
"Wow~! The panda's eating bamboo! It's so cuuute!"
Masao turned and locked eyes with the pink-haired girl, who had spotted him at the same moment.
"Fujiwara-senpai?"
"Masao-kun!"
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