Hermione, the job of 'my mum' is already taken, so stop acting like her already!" Ron was saying to Hermione when Harry caught up with them.
"I'm not! I'm just making sure you know when you have been impolite!" Hermione fired back.
"Please see my last comment." Ron retorted. As the three crossed into a crossroad-like area of the school, a sneering voice called out from ahead of them.
"Well, well, look what we have here, it's Potty, the Weasel and the Mudblood." Draco Malfoy proclaimed as he strode forwards, his usual 'friends' (read: bodyguards) Vincent Crabbe and Gregory Goyle Junior loomed behind him.
"What do you want Malfoy?" Harry sighed. He really didn't want to have to deal with the ball of spite that was the younger Malfoy.
"My father was disgraced because of you, Potter." Malfoy said angrily, "He said to say watch your back…as well as your friend's backs…who knows what kind of…accidents…could happen to them…"
As Malfoy's voice trailed off in an attempt at a threatening manner, Ron, who's face had been growing steadily redder as the arrogant scion of the Malfoy family spoke, tried to draw his wand, only to remember it was gone, destroyed in the Chamber of Secrets by the idiot Lockhart.
"Ah, what's wrong Weasel? Lost your wand?" Malfoy sneered.
"Malfoy, shut up and watch your mouth when dealing with your superiors." Harry said flatly, making Malfoy's jaw drop.
"'Superior' The Weasel? Hardly." Draco scoffed.
"The Ancient House of Weasley actually IS superior to the Noble House of Malfoy," Harry corrected him, "But I was referring to you threatening a member of the Most Noble and Ancient House of Potter…in other words, me."
"Wha…you…half-blood scum!" Draco spat out incoherently.
"What, does it get your goat Malfoy? The fact that, despite your family having lived in Britain for almost a thousand years, you are still not considered worthy of the title 'Noble and Ancient'?" Harry said softly, "Does it feel humiliating that Ron's family, who lost that title in the last two-hundred years, is STILL considered to outrank you? Oh, I think it does, doesn't it?"
"Serpensortia!" Malfoy screamed in rage as he pointed his wand at Harry, conjuring a large black snake that hissed at Harry threateningly.
"You have a really bad memory Malfoy." Harry smirked before turning his attention to the snake.
/Find the nearest window and leave this castle. Never attack a human.\ Harry hissed in Parseltongue at the snake.
/By your will, Speaker.\ the snake hissed and slithered away.
Malfoy flushed red at Harry's casual dismissal of his conjured snake, not even bothering to draw his wand to deal with it.
"Locomotor Wibbly!" he snarled, sending the Jelly-Legs Jinx at Harry this time, who dodged tot the side and drew his own wand.
"Mucus ad Nauseam Maxima!" he shouted, sending the most powerful version of the Curse of the Bogies at Malfoy in a jet of green light, which struck the white-haired brat in his chest.
"A-a-a-a-a-a-a-achooo!" Malfoy sneezed, spraying the ground in front of him with what looked like a pint of snot, making Ron go, "Ewww."
The half-trolls -pardon me, bodyguards began to move towards Harry threateningly, making him switch his attention to them.
"Partum est Puris!" Harry shouted, a loud 'bang' coming from his wand and his target, Crabbe, who reeled back as a large amount of sickening yellow pus erupted from his nose.
"Terit!" Goyle rasped, sending a Stinging Hex at Harry, who winced as his off-hand was struck and started to swell up like a balloon.
"Steleus!" he countered, hitting the mean-spirited boy with a series of green rings that made him sneeze uncontrollably.
Harry then returned his attention to Malfoy, who looked like he was having the most severe flu case in the world.
I have heard your message, Malfoy." Harry said coldly, "Now, take one back to your dear old dad for me. Tell Lucy the Loser that if he so much as touches my friends, I will make your life at Hogwarts a hell from which you will notwake from. Tell him he is pathetic and a coward. Tell him he is a hypocrite who follows a half-blood. Look up the history of one Tom Marvolo Riddle Junior. That is whom he serves.
Now go to the Hospital Wing with your boy-toys and out of my sight!"
Malfoy and his goons staggered off towards the Hospital Wing, too bunged up with their various curses to even sneer at Harry as they went.
Harry turned back to Ron and Hermione, who were gaping at him.
"What?" he asked.
"Mate, was that first one the Curse of the Bogies?" Ron asked, almost reverently.
"Yep. Found the basic version in the Library, along with the more powerful version I just used on Malfoy." Harry replied, "Even with the counter-curse, he's still going to have a head cold for the next week, one that Pepper-Up Potions won't work on well."
"Remind me not to get on your bad side mate." Ron said as he shook his head, "And can you teach me that?"
"Sure." Harry laughed, "Once you get a new wand."
"Merlin, I hate not having my wand." Ron groused, "Even the broken one was better than this. Bloody Lockhart."
"Ronald! Language!" Hermione scolded, "And Harry, you might want to do something about your left hand."
"Oh, right." Harry saw that his hand looked like a blown up glove.
"Reparifors" he said, pointing his wand at his hand, causing it to reduce in size to normal.
"Good thing you looked that up after we learned the Stinging Hex, 'Mione." Harry said with a grin. The Reparifors spell was good at dealing with very minor magically induced afflictions, just like the Stinging hex.
"What would you two do without me?" Hermione asked rhetorically as she led the trio towards the Gryffindor Common Room.
"I don't want to find out." Harry muttered as they approached the Fat Lady.
A shriek came from the other side of the Fat Lady, in the Grand Staircase, which made Harry grin.
"Sounds like Peeves caught Malfoy in his prank." he remarked.
"My day is complete." Ron said happily.