He was sitting on the edge of my bed, his feet resting on the horizontal bar beneath a small stool, his legs pressed together. An open book rested between his legs, which he was intently reading, occasionally pulling out a pen to write something, clearly studying. A large bag of items, which I quickly identified as fruits and snacks, sat on the small cabinet nearby.
There were also peeled oranges and a sliced apple—always so thoughtful. My heart warmed slightly, and I felt a touch of gratitude.
This at least made me less awkward. Teacher Li Yue's side was overflowing with gifts, practically a convenience store, while my table had been empty.
As if he heard the sound from the restroom, he turned, saw me, and his eyes immediately lit up. He instantly put down his book and ran over, grabbing my right arm and taking hold of my IV stand to help me back to bed.
I pouted. "Liu Xiaoyu, I thought you weren't going to speak to me anymore."
He paused, then said softly, "Would I be that petty?"
"Yes, you would," I nodded.
"Tch..."
Liu Xiaoyu helped me settle into the bed and pulled out some tissues. I took them, wiped away the sweat, and tossed the used tissues into the garbage bin nearby.
"Are you feeling better?"
Once I was settled, concern showed in Liu Xiaoyu's blue eyes. He leaned closer to examine me, and the familiar milky scent wafted over.
"Much better. I'll be discharged tomorrow," I said. I couldn't look Liu Xiaoyu in the eye. As a man, his eyes were too captivating, especially the blue color, which felt pure and enticing. Staring into them made me feel uncontrollably drawn in. Imagine two grown men gazing at each other affectionately—who could handle that?
"No... The doctor said you have to stay for a few more days." Liu Xiaoyu shook his head, looking at me seriously.
"Stay here for what? I'm going home. This place is too boring."
"No," he insisted on his decision.
"What's wrong with going home?" I chuckled. "My injuries aren't that severe. I'll recover just fine at home. Not everyone is as delicate and pampered as you are."
As soon as I said that, I clearly saw Liu Xiaoyu freeze. His lips tightened—the telltale sign he was about to cry.
"I messed up," I instantly thought. How could I forget? You can't say that to Liu Xiaoyu.
"I'm sorry, Liu Xiaoyu, please don't cry. I didn't mean it. I was just talking nonsense. Everyone's situation is different. I shouldn't measure you by my own circumstances," I quickly tried to salvage the situation, assuring him it wasn't intentional.
Liu Xiaoyu didn't speak, biting his lower lip and sniffing lightly. He merely turned his head slightly, preparing to leave.
I was afraid he would run off somewhere to cry secretly. What would that make me?
Impulsively, I grabbed his arm. "Where are you going?"
"What are you doing?" This time, I truly angered him. I had touched his sensitive spot, forgetting his germophobia again.
Liu Xiaoyu turned, looking at me with swollen, red eyes, his tone hostile. He was like a startled, bristling cat, his eyes filled with anger and grievance.
This scene made me feel inexplicably annoyed. Liu Xiaoyu was good in every way, but sometimes he would get angry for no reason, and in the past two days, his temper had been exceptionally strange. It felt like I was the one being taken care of. I was injured, and an unknown spark of irritation was flickering inside me, finally flaring up.
I couldn't hold back, raising my voice a bit. "Go home. I don't need your care. You're a young master at home. How are you suited to look after others? You cry at the drop of a hat, and your mom sees it and thinks I'm bullying you. Yesterday, I thought the attack was aimed at me, but it turns out the real target was you. I innocently took a few stabs for you, and now I can't even get out of bed. Why should I also put up with your temper?"
After saying all that, I felt it was inappropriate, so I added, "But this is all my fault. It's not your fault. Blame me for insisting you come to the hospital with me. It's my mistake."
I then released his arm, not caring about his reaction. Although I could clearly feel his body trembling, he immediately ran out after I let go, pulling the door open and then closing it gently. I distinctly saw that his eyes were completely red.
I didn't want to deal with anything anymore. I felt an inexplicable wave of irritation. I simply closed my eyes, lay on the bed, and blocked everything out.
Perhaps this is just how I am—too used to being alone, not knowing how to interact with others.
Fine, let it be this way.
I slowly closed my eyes, my mind drifting up and away, floating past the bed, through the ceiling, all the way to the sky, piercing the atmosphere, until I reached outer space.
I thought about many things, watching memories stream by like meteors. Most of them were gray; there were almost no fond memories left. I only knew that my mother had always been extremely strict with me. All the pampering and tenderness seemed reserved for my sister, and I was like an outsider, only able to glimpse that affection through a crack in the door.
My mother had always been wary of me; I should have realized this long ago.
She might have been taking out the misfortune she experienced with my father on me. I had always done well in the past, so she was relatively satisfied with me. But if I showed even the slightest hint of bad behavior, she would be instantly and utterly disappointed, convinced that my previous good behavior was merely an act. She only sought to impose constraints on me, seemingly never considering my feelings.
I had never once heard her genuinely say she loved me.
I thought for a long, long time, until late into the night, before my thoughts gradually cleared, and I finally fell asleep.
I woke up the next day, feeling much better. At least getting out of bed was no problem, as my injuries were mostly superficial and healed quickly.
As I expected, no one came in the morning, and no one brought me breakfast.
Given all the angry things I had said to Liu Xiaoyu yesterday, I should have anticipated this situation.
I got up and saw the oranges and apples beside the bed. The apple had already oxidized overnight and changed color. Although my stomach was rumbling with hunger, I had no intention of touching them.
After getting my medication and bandages changed that morning, I informed the doctor of my intention to be discharged. The doctor examined me, found no issues, prescribed some medicine, gave me some instructions, and let me go.
I thought I would have to go home to get my bank card and money to settle the bill, but at checkout, I found there was still a surplus of a few thousand yuan. Liu Xiaoyu's mother must have left a substantial amount of money, enough for me to stay much longer.
I didn't take the remaining money; I figured the owner should come to retrieve it. I had no need for it.
The hospital was naturally happy to let me go. After all, the money was there as collateral. As long as there was money, they didn't care what I did.
The midday sun was intense, like a delicious, cool, and fragrant toffee, or perhaps a sticky, juicy sour plum soup. Its color and flavor were irresistibly tempting, making one long for its sweetness.
I enjoyed imagining the radiant, fresh midday sun as various delightful delicacies—a beautiful, poetic, and vivid fantasy.
I looked quite pathetic: bandaged arms and some wrapping around my body. Luckily, my face wasn't injured, which I considered fortunate; I wouldn't want to be disfigured.
I hailed a taxi at the hospital entrance. As the car pulled up, I suddenly remembered I had no money on me.
"Driver, I don't have any cash on me. Can I pay you when we get home?"
I suddenly realized how miserable I was, reduced to a state where I couldn't even afford a taxi.
The driver didn't speak, just turned and looked at me. Seeing my sorry state, he didn't have the heart to mock me, instead stepping on the gas and leaving me to inhale a mouthful of exhaust fumes.
The thick exhaust fumes hit me, making my eyes water.
In that moment, I felt the massive city turning endlessly—people coming and going, traffic flowing rapidly. Everyone seemed to have a destination and a purpose, and I was the only one with nowhere to go.
An unprecedented sense of loneliness swept over me, leaving me feeling abandoned by the world.
Fortunately, a driver eventually agreed to take me. Perhaps seeing the value of the new phone I took out, they figured there was no need to cheat me out of the fare.
I got into the car, and the car started, ready to leave the area.
Just then, a black BMW drove in, barely a meter away from the taxi. Because my window was open, the person inside, who was gazing out the window in confusion, saw me instantly.
As the car window rolled down, a pale face and blue eyes were revealed, showing urgency. He looked like he wanted to open his mouth to say something.
Unfortunately, we passed each other the next moment.
All sound was lost in the wind, leaving no ripple.
Due to my emotional state, I was sitting in the back, eyes closed and resting, not wanting to deal with the outside world, so I naturally noticed nothing.
After a while, we reached the complex entrance. I got out and quickly went upstairs to grab some change, only to find the house in utter chaos. I realized the reason immediately but didn't have time to dwell on it, rushing back down to pay the driver.
The rush strained my wounds, causing pain, but I didn't want to make him wait too long, so I hurried to give him the money.
After the taxi left, I bought a large amount of food and slowly went back upstairs to my room.
"Xiao Xue..."
I looked at the dog wolfing down the food with a sense of guilt, my heart aching.
I hadn't realized that with everything that happened, I had forgotten I had a dog at home.
It whimpered while eating, as if accusing me.
Fortunately, some bread and snacks weren't stored too high and it had managed to open them and eat, causing a terrible mess everywhere. But that didn't matter; the important thing was that it hadn't starved.
Looking at it, I felt a sense of shared misery.
I stroked its head and showed it my bandaged arm, indicating that I hadn't meant to neglect it.
Whether it understood or not, I showed it anyway, as there was no one else to show my plight to.
After Xiao Xue finished eating and drank some water, it lay down and quickly fell asleep. It looked like it had been severely hungry during the days I was gone.
Seeing this, I realized I needed to buy some dog food and an automatic feeder. Otherwise, no one would feed Xiao Xue when I was alone at home.
This was unacceptable. I had taken it in, and I had to take responsibility.
I tidied up the room that Xiao Xue had ransacked and then lay down on the sofa to rest.
I looked up and saw the origami cranes and small toys still hanging quietly on the clean, white ceiling. My gaze unconsciously swept across the ceiling, and in one corner, under the light, I seemed to see a faint glint.
"What is that?"
I immediately became suspicious. I squinted for a long time but couldn't quite see it, so I zoomed in using my phone camera.
Liu Xiaoyu's new phone had excellent resolution, allowing me to easily see what it was: a camera.
I was shocked. When was this installed? I didn't remember my mother installing anything like this at home.
Normally, I wouldn't let my mind wander, but after the incidents with Mistress Extinction and being attacked with a knife, my perspective was different.
I slowly got up, took the clothes rack from the balcony, aimed it at the camera, and tried to poke it down. But it didn't budge; it was installed extremely securely.
I poked it a few more times. Still nothing. The effort pulled at my wounds, making me incredibly frustrated. My movements became more forceful. After several repeated, unrestrained jabs, there was a crisp sound. I had successfully stabbed and destroyed the hidden camera.
I wiped the sweat from my brow and began a careful search of the room, looking for anything else out of the ordinary.
My new discovery frightened me even more: I found evidence that someone else had been in the house. The drawer in my mother's room seemed to have been subtly opened and closed.
And someone had apparently been in my room as well. I clearly remembered that the placement of my copy of "The Plant Encyclopedia" was wrong. I was sure I had left it near the head of the bed, not with the pages facing out. Normally, I wouldn't think twice about such things, but now I noticed them with sharp clarity.
This discovery made me feel terrified. The thought of such potential dangers inside my home made me feel deeply insecure.
After much thought, I decided to handle everything before doing anything else.
I took my ID card downstairs and applied for a brand new phone card. I inserted it into my phone and finally managed to log back into my WeChat and QQ accounts.
I opened WeChat and QQ and glanced through them. Besides a few advertisements from mini-programs, there were no other messages. My social life was pitifully small. Who would notice a nobody like me? Who would chat with me?
It was exactly as expected, but a strange sense of melancholy still filled my heart. Who truly cares about me?
I pushed these thoughts aside. While shopping for the dog supplies, I passed a bank. I hesitated for a moment, then felt the card Luo Fei had given me in my pocket. I finally sighed. I would return it to Liu Xiaoyu when I went to school. I didn't want to owe him anything, and Luo Fei's attitude had made me even more uncomfortable.
Let it be. I didn't want to deal with any of it.
Although he might not have meant any harm, his behavior was unbearable for someone sensitive and insecure like me.
After returning home, I called a locksmith to replace the lock.
Once the locksmith left, seeing the brand new lock gave me a little more peace of mind.
I sat down on the sofa and then made a call to Mistress Extinction.
"Hello?" The phone was answered; it was Bai Manwen's voice.
"This is Lin Nan. I have something to deal with for the next couple of days. I need to take two days off." My voice was devoid of the fear and appeasement I usually used with her. I now had the courage and confidence to face her. My voice was low, almost like a command.
"You've already missed two days of class," her voice came through, sounding like she was suppressing anger.
"So what?" My voice rose slightly. The events of the last two days had hardened my heart. Already annoyed, I couldn't tolerate her tone. My voice held a threat. "What if I don't show up for the whole semester? What can you do? Do you dare?"
The phone line went silent immediately. No sound came through.
After a long time, just as I was about to lose my patience, I finally heard her voice, seemingly filled with utter helplessness, saying, "Fine."
"Good. You'd better be sensible," my voice remained cold.
"So, should I hang up?" she asked softly, as if seeking my permission.
Just as I was about to hang up, I thought of something. "Wait."
"Is there anything else?" Her voice sounded filled with endless humiliation and grievance.
"If my mother calls to ask about my situation, tell her that everything is business as usual," my voice paused momentarily, then became icy. "If you dare to say anything extra, you'll be responsible for the consequences."
I hung up without waiting for her agreement. I was certain she would do exactly as I said.
Xiao Xue was lying on the floor mat, quietly watching its owner on the balcony. It didn't understand why he was maintaining that posture for so long, seemingly motionless.
How could a dog understand a person's thoughts?
The evening breeze was cool, blowing over me, as if smoothing over my past hurts, gradually calming my heart.
It wasn't until the night had completely swallowed me and the lights in the neighborhood began to turn on that I gradually came back to myself.
"It's dark."
I said it instinctively, my words dissipating into the darkness without a ripple. The empty room contained only me.
"It's dark."
I spoke again, as if waking from a dream. I finally moved from the balcony, came into the living room, picked up my phone, leashed the dog, and went to the entryway to change my shoes.
Just as I was leading Xiao Xue out the door, my phone suddenly chimed with a message notification.
I paused, then opened the phone.
I was instantly stunned, my entire body frozen in that moment.
The green message box emitted a faint glow in the dark room. As it illuminated my cheek, it also reflected the deep tears welling up in my eyes.