You quickly left the luxury hotel, even paying for a taxi, as if afraid a woman was chasing you. You returned to school. It was 7:09 a.m., with about ten minutes remaining before class. You went straight to the dorm, changed your formal mixer attire into your school uniform, and then hurried to the classroom of the Britain Class.
The moment Ei stepped into the classroom, he saw two Round Table Knights chatting casually.
"Morning, Sir Ei. You're finally back," Gawain greeted him, waving a hand as Ei rushed in.
Ei walked directly up to their desks and asked, a little awkwardly, "Did anything happen last night after I got drunk...?" He was afraid to ask too specifically, lest the morning's situation be known to more people.
"Nothing much. We just carried the drunk you back to your hotel room," Gawain answered truthfully.
"And nothing else happened? Was there anything suspicious?"
Gawain immediately recalled the glass of Water of Life placed on Ei's nightstand. "Oh, that? Don't worry about it. That was just a gift from Sir Tristan."
"A gift... ?!"
Wait, the woman on the bed was a gift from Tristan?! How could that be? Tristan would never do something so depraved!
Tristan, however, admitted cheerfully, "It's not really a gift, just a friend's concern! Mordred tried to talk me out of it, but I just knew you'd have a need for it (to quench your midnight thirst)."
"Holy cow, Mō-chan was there too?"
"Yes, everyone was in your room at the time."
Good grief, was last night some kind of mass orgy? Was watching me "operate" part of the play?
If Artoria knew how kinky you guys are behind her back, she'd be weeping tears of old age!
Mixers, as he suspected, were just the foreplay for a free-for-all party.
Ei immediately covered his face, feeling completely ashamed.
"Sir Gawain, lend me your Excalibur Galatine. I'm going to chop this guy up and consider it cleaning up your Round Table Knights' household!"
"Sir Ei, it's not that I want to preach to you, but please forgive Sir Tristan. His thought process is sometimes quite eccentric, but he means no harm." Gawain just patted his back earnestly.
"All of us Round Table Knights have been subjected to his antics to some extent; we are all used to it."
"...Just how wild are you Round Table Knights in private?!"
After your probing, your misunderstanding was finally cleared.
It turned out Tristan had only offered you a glass of Water of Life, which was still outrageous.
In the end, you still had no idea how that woman got into your room or why she was lying in bed with you.
"So, what exactly happened last night?" Gawain handed him a bottle of mineral water. "Care to tell us?"
Ei shook his head like a rattle-drum. There was no way he could reveal what happened last night.
"Absolutely not. It's an unspeakable secret..."
"So, you only told Merlin?"
"Huh, how did you connect the conversation there?"
"Because I think Merlin is 'not a human being' in every sense of the word," Gawain laughed.
"Speaking of Merlin," Tristan suddenly spoke up, and there was a slight smile on his handsome face. To see such a perpetually brooding man like Tristan smile like this would be the equivalent of a hysterical burst of laughter for a normal person.
"Hey, Tristan, why are you so happy today? Did you hook up with another married woman?" Ei asked curiously, then offered an earnest warning: "I advise you to at least avoid Senior Brynhildr next door. She's a landmine, and her husband will literally beat you to death."
"No, no. I have bad news and good news," Tristan leaned in and said. "The bad news is that our Britain Class homeroom teacher, Merlin, has finally been exposed for catfishing, and the person he catfished was actually a Grand Class Servant. Principal Merlin was beaten so badly! He won't be able to teach us for a while."
"...Oh my God, that's so sudden."
Ei and Gawain leaned back in a tactical retreat, letting out a heavy sigh.
Gawain then asked, "So, what's the bad news?"
"That was the bad news."
"Then that means there are two pieces of good news. A double blessing," Ei sometimes couldn't help but feel that Gawain was quite venomous in his remarks. Or rather, the guy was just pure; he consistently disliked things he didn't like, like Merlin and Mordred.
"The good news is," Tristan said, "I just heard we're getting a new homeroom teacher for our class. The teachers say this new homeroom teacher is exceptional, a true Brit, a King, who leads a whole order of knights, has blonde hair, and is said to be extremely beautiful."
Ei gave a thumbs up: "That's impressive, Sir Tristan. It's a miracle you managed to gather so many details yet failed to find the simplest thing: her name."
"With all those characteristics, do we even need to ask who it is? Our King is going to teach us!"
"Praise the King!" Gawain and Tristan's expressions were like pilgrims going on a pilgrimage.
"Uh, did you call everyone here for just that?" Ei shook his head lackadaisically.
He was nothing like these Round Table Knights. After playing FGO for so many years, Artoria held no novelty for him anymore. After seeing the same Takeuchi-face and the same unchanging sprite poses for years, it would be a miracle if he didn't develop an Artoria PTSD.
"Don't rush to uncork the champagne, you two. What will you do if it's the male King Arthur? If Arthur (Prototype) really comes, Gawain, your Prince Charming persona won't stand out at all."
"As long as it's the King, we welcome them all!" the two Round Table Knights replied in unison.
"Alright, good luck to you both."
"Wait a minute, Ei. We haven't finished yet. There's one more key characteristic about this new homeroom teacher. Aren't you curious?" Tristan called out to him.
"Not curious. This is the news I care the least about this century," he said without turning around.
"This new homeroom teacher's Class is Lancer!"
Hearing this, Ei froze in place.
"L... Lancer?"
"Lancer." Tristan nodded.
"The... bigger one?"
"The bigger one."
"I see..."
That would be the tall, especially well-endowed, and all-around sexy Lancer Artoria.
No wonder the guys in the class seemed so excited today! They were waiting for a beautiful homeroom teacher!
"..."
Ei mused for a moment, then quickly straightened up in his seat, adopting the most upright posture of a model student.
"Do either of you have hairspray? Lend it to me. I want to leave a good impression on the new homeroom teacher. Please, I'll give you five dollars!"