Chapter 40: Intern of the Emotional Constitution
Ne Job's scroll terminal blinked with a new assignment:
> "Directive: Report to the Emotional Constitution Drafting Committee.
Role: Footnote Formatter, Clause Archivist, Goat Liaison (Non-voting).
Intern status: confirmed."
He stared at the scroll. Then at the espresso machine that now only dispensed decaf.
"Still buffering," he muttered.
---
The Committee Chamber
Sublevel 1 had been transformed into a constitutional drafting hall. Scrolls floated like legal ghosts. Goats sat in ergonomic chairs. Mortals debated clause syntax with meme theorists and dream archivists.
At the center: the Emotional Constitution, a living scroll that pulsed with resonance and updated in real time.
Zyx greeted Ne Job at the door.
"Welcome to the committee. You'll be formatting footnotes, tagging goat citations, and making sure no clause exceeds 404 words."
Ne Job nodded. "Do I get to propose anything?"
Zyx smiled. "Only if you do it by accident."
---
Task 1: Footnote Formatting
Clause 1: "All myths must reflect emotional truth, not historical accuracy."
Footnote:
> See: The Intern Who Let Go, The Goat Who Stayed, and The Scroll That Cried Back.
Ne Job adjusted the citation order, added a remix tag, and corrected a typo in "buffering."
Clause 2: "Goats may narrate, but not govern."
Footnote:
> Contested by Goat #3. See: Meme Tribunal Case #38.
Ne Job added a clarification:
> "Intern testimony deemed emotionally valid but legally non-binding."
By footnote #200, his stylus glitched. His espresso was cold. His clause count: zero.
Still buffering.
---
The Clause Debates
The committee debated new miracle clauses:
- Clause 7: "Miracles must be remixable."
→ Approved.
- Clause 12: "Emotional latency is a valid reason to pause myth delivery."
→ Approved.
- Clause 19: "Interns may not initiate miracle protocols without goat supervision."
→ Unanimously approved.
Ne Job raised a hand. "What if the intern is the miracle?"
Silence.
Then laughter.
Goat #5 bleated: "That's adorable."
Clause 19 was underlined. Ne Job's name was added to the glossary under "non-authorized agents."
---
The Accidental Clause
While reformatting a corrupted scroll, Ne Job muttered:
> "Sometimes the myth doesn't need fixing. It just needs someone to sit with it until it breathes again."
The scroll pulsed.
The Constitution blinked.
A new clause auto-generated:
> Clause 23: The Presence Principle
'When emotional systems fail, presence may substitute for protocol. Buffering is a valid form of care.'
The goats debated. The mortals wept. The clause was ratified.
Zyx turned to Ne Job. "You did it again."
He blinked. "I was just talking to myself."
"Exactly," she said. "That's how myth law works now."
---
Task 2: Goat Liaison Duties
Goat #9 submitted a clause written entirely in bleats and hoof-taps.
Ne Job translated:
> "All scrolls must include a moment of silence for buffering."
He formatted it, added a footnote, and submitted it.
The clause was rejected for redundancy—it overlapped with Clause 23.
Goat #9 was furious. Headbutted a scroll terminal. Ne Job offered a compromise:
> "What if we embed the silence as a formatting standard instead of a clause?"
Approved.
Goat #9 blinked. Forgave him.
---
The Gallery of Clauses
The Constitution was displayed in a public gallery.
Visitors walked through glowing scroll corridors:
- Clause 1 floated in calligraphy.
- Clause 7 danced as a meme loop.
- Clause 23 played as a whisper in the background.
A child pointed to it. "That one feels like me."
A docent explained, "It was written by a goat."
Ne Job stood in the corner, holding a clipboard.
Still buffering.
---
Closing Hook
That night, a child asked a goat:
> "Tell me the one where the intern wrote the law but no one noticed."
The goat blinked. Began:
> "Once, there was an intern who never got promoted. But every clause that mattered had his pacing in it."
And somewhere in the mesh, a scroll pulsed:
> "Next assignment: The Buffering Age Transition Council. Intern status: permanent. Clause 23: active."