I was Benny.
And I had no idea how the hell I got here.
My head was spinning. I had to take a seat to hold myself together.
The tall guy was still smiling at me. "You must be exhausted, Russell. Want some water?"
Russell.
He kept saying Russell.
"Hey," he said again, handing me a bottle of water like this wasn't a full psychotic episode waiting to happen.
"Thanks," I muttered, trying to sound chill…..except my hand was shaking so bad. I took one sip, choked instantly, and baptized my entire shirt.
"You good?" He asked.
"Totally," I wheezed. "Love water. Huge fan."
Internally, I was screaming.
Externally, I was doing this awkward polite nod thing like a malfunctioning robot.
The blond one walked over to seat beside me. "You're lucky, dude. Riri said you almost didn't make it before the storm hit."
Riri.
Russell.
Silvevein.
My pulse spiked.
Oh my God.
The crush. The parties. The horny diary.
I wasn't in heaven.
I was in the freaking diary.
My lungs forgot how to lung.
My brain was playing back everything I'd just read…..every page, every smutty line, every "his shoulder brushed mine and I saw my afterlife"… and now I was standing in it.
I wanted to scream.
I really wanted to.
"Uh, actually," I winced. "where's your restroom? Just….hydration, digestion, you know. All that."
They both pointed down a short hallway. "First door on the left."
"Perfect. Thanks," I nodded, and sped walked away.
The restroom was huge, marble and gold taps. I slammed the door shut, pressed my back to it, and stared into the mirror.
And that's when I choked for real.
Because the reflection staring back at me wasn't me.
"My hair," I gasped. "It's….it's not ginger anymore."
I yanked at a strand. Ouuch. Black, glossy.
Not my color.
"Where's my signature ginger hair? My personality?"
I leaned closer. The face in the mirror blinked back….smooth skin, delicate nose, stupidly long lashes.
"Oh, my God." I traced my jaw. "Why do I look like I moisturize and journal about sunsets?"
Then I froze.
My breath caught, and the room spun just a little.
No. No, no, no. It's real.
I tore my shirt off, staring down at the lean, toned body in the mirror…..someone else's abs, someone else's everything.
Oh My God.
My tattoos were gone. Even my nipple piercing.
My voice broke. "I'm really Russell. I'm freaking Russell Reyes. From the creepy diary!"
I gripped the counter, gasping for air . "I always knew something was off about that glowing diary….but what is this, my punishment? Is this karma?"
I dragged my hands down my face. "This can't be real. This can't be happening
Then the gay panic kicked in. Like, full gay survival instinct.
I hesitated. Looked at the belt. Then at the mirror.
"Okay, don't get me wrong," I muttered, unbuckling as fast as I can, "but if I'm gonna be stuck in this man's body, I need to know what I'm working with."
I paused. Gasped, and froze.
"Oh my god," I whispered. "He's… he's got upgrades. No. No way. It…. it increased? Like by an inch?"
I grabbed the counter to steady myself. "Is it weird that I'm impressed? It's weird. I'm weird. I'm in a stranger's body and the first thing I check is the dick.
I smacked my forehead. "Focus, Benny, focus! You're in danger, not in OnlyFans!"
Then…. knock, knock.
"You okay in there?"
I panicked, splashed cold water on my face like that would somehow erase the situation. "Yeah! Totally fine!" My voice cracked. "Just… digestion! Hydration! You know!"
My reflection looked like he wanted to sob and flirt at the same time.
"Okay, deep breath," I whispered. "You're fine. You're hot. You're confused. You're living a twinks's dream. But fine."
I wiped my face, practiced a smile that screamed I'm not having a psychotic break, and whispered.
"Let's go meet the people who apparently know me now."
Then I opened the door.