I was standing in the dark.
Not a light source anywhere that could illuminate the quiet space.
Yet, I could see. I could see everything here, in this large room... ... ...
Even through the thick muddy numbness that I was experiencing, I recognize how wrong everything was.
I was standing on top of a large bed, that I was sinking into. My knees were trembling, my eyes wide open, & I was breathing hard after-... ...
Honestly, I don't know?
I was just facing a pile of intertwined bodies of gore where a flock of dark ravens, & or crows, were picking & pecking at, swallowing what they could get through they're throats.
But I didn't do this, I couldn't have done this! How could I do this?!!
The numbness wrapped harder around my head, those panic thoughts soon shut itself up... ...
There was so much noise earlier. There was loud celebratory music, happy & joyous talks, angry & horrible yelling, & soon after horrorfied but so satisfying screaming.
It's all quite now, nothing but the flock & me were making any sounds, which made everything so much better.
Yeah, that is another thing I should have mentioned. I- no he was happy.
The murky fog couldn't hide the absolute joy & the very innocent pride that my new little body was feeling.
The trembling was out of excitement & hope, not fear or disgust.
Like I couldn't believe that they were truly gone, that they finally left me alone...
Finally, I carefully & slowly got down from the bed & turn away from it. I then followed the really foreign, yet still, somehow very familiar direction of where my room was.
Making sure that I didn't bother any of birds or step ontop of any of the dismembered limbs or bodies that I left through... that rampage.
The doors were gone so I didn't need to open any of them. I did step on some of the remains, small pieces that left cuts & splinters that I felt but soon forgotten when I took another step forward.
Honestly, I should be questioning everything about this but apparently there was nothing to be worried about for the boy who is still here. No full blown panic of any kind, just a really slight bit of confusion, some feeling of dread here & there, but that was all.
I put on the only other underwear I had left & the large tank top that I was lucky that I wasn't wearing when everything happened.
When I step out of his room I realized that the kid didn't have any shoes or socks. So I went back into his parents room, search for a bit, & grabbed a comfortable big pair of socks to put on.
I don't know why that was the only thing that made me to take control & do something.
When that was done I soon stepped out of the wreck apartment room, making sure that I didn't trouble any of my guest or step on the bloody mess so my feet wear wouldn't be ruined or wet.
I don't know how long I was just wondering around. Everything after I left was a blur of loud sounds, bright colorfull lights, & large towering buildings.
I didn't bumped into anyone, which I am greatful for. How would they have reacted when they saw me?
Maybe some passerbys spotted me from a distance where the light couldn't quite reach. Others might have saw me clearly & took another direction, not wanting to deal with what whatever I been through.
Either way, it was just me & the crows & ravens above me, following me.
Some were hopping, others would fly for short distances to reach me. I wasn't really fast so it was no trouble for any of them.
I noticed them, a crowd was forming behind me & didn't know why at the time. They were just coming, interested in what was coming.
Soon the sun was coming, more people were getting up & leaving their homes. More cars were on the street, more light sources for the people to see.
Bible passages on the wall, chains wrapped around my limbs, crawling on my knees.
Eating from a dog bowl, being hit by a f@#$ing belt, screaming & yelling, smell of smoke, being burned by a hot iron.
Every step I took flashes of images & feelings were popping up. Things I didn't want to hear or ever experience again. God, what have they done to you!
I was stumbling now. Each flash of pain felt like a new hit against my skin, I couldn't stop, I couldn't let them get me again!
The sun light was closer now, way too close. I didn't want it to touch me, I didn't want anyone to see me, please keep the darkness here, please, I'm begging you, don't leave me!
Everything started getting louder, everything was getting brighter. More & more people were out & they're faces told me all!
The preacher was louder, the crying was now harder!!
I saw their faces, they were scared of me, hugging & crying when I was screaming & bawling, I just wanted something to eat, I just wanted the pain to end!!
I got to the middle of the road & curled into a ball.
I can hear the birds cawing in distressed, everyone of them trying to get louder to help shield me from everything else.
I screamed harder, trying to hear myself from all the loud sounds that was drowning me! Oh god, it was everywhere, please shut up, shut up, why is it getting louder & louder!!!
Then, all at once, it stopped, everything just stopped. Everything was silent nothing could be herd. I look up at everyone, turning to side to side making sure everything wasn't a lie.
I slowly stood up, barely able to, hopeful that nothing else was going to go wrong.
A large wolf in the dark, glaring at me with bright white eyes.
A boy with a wolf's head, a wag of a tail, sharper & tougher nails, standing in front of a large full length mirror.
Then the preacher slammed down that hammer on top of that sharp big iron nail!!!
The light finally hit me, & then everything, & I mean everything, came back so much worst!
I was screaming, clawing at my skin, clawing at my head. My body was twisting, withering & breaking, I was banging it onto the road wanting everything to just stop, wanting the pain, the sound, everything to stop. I wanted the night to return & needed the darkness to hug me again!!
The birds was going crazy, everything was bending, twisting, & morphing. The building were getting bigger & smaller, the people's limbs were stretching & crumbling, there was so much screaming everywhere!!
Then my back ripped apart, which made everything dark again.
It made everything better again.