He averted her eyes for a while, exhaling a long, uneasy sigh ,the kind that came with too many thoughts and not enough rest.
"It's best if you rest now."
Her eyes drifted shut almost instantly, a soft relief washing through her entire body. She didn't even mean to speak, unplanned, carried by instinct more than intention. Her lips parted, her tongue felt tied, but she forced the words out anyway.
"...Thank you."
He hesitated. His hand, still holding the jar of salve, tightened around it. He didn't think he deserved her gratitude. Clearing his throat, turned his gaze away.
"Shhh."
The sound came out almost sharply , a quiet command, but not out of cruelty. He was silencing her because he knew if she said anything else, he might lose the control he was barely holding onto. Whatever emotions he was suppressing, he wouldn't let them touch now.
---
Whatever was in that salve , it burned. Her skin burned. Her eyes burned.
Was I feverish? Maybe I'd caught something , not surprising, considering how unsterile this place was.
Then came a knock at the door.
She didn't even have the strength to answer.
Whoever it was, they could come in on their own.
Her breathing was too heavy, too slow. The footsteps that followed were long and measured.
İt is Ravion?
Two green eyes entered her fading field of vision.
Oh, no. Now? Of all times?
Her heart clenched, chest tightening until she could barely breathe.
This was the worst possible timing. Even closing my eyes wouldn't help, he'd still see my terrible face.
The thought only made her angrier, embarrassed.
And there he stood , tall, strong, the kind of man whose very presence carried warmth resolve.
He'd come, probably just to check on me?, maybe out of some sense of duty.
His gaze softened , that same infuriating tenderness , as he looked down at her swollen, bruised face.
No one had ever looked at me like that before.
She couldn't meet his eyes. Every inch of her skin burned , whether from the salve or sheer embarrassment, she couldn't tell.
"You shouldn't have done that to yourself,"
he said quietly.
What? What does he mean? Wait, is he… worried about me? Aww Idiot.
"It wasn't something I could control."
"You hurt yourself,"
he said, his voice rougher now.
"In this condition, if you push again, you might not even stand back up."
"Doesn't matter…"
"It does!"
His sharp tone startled her.
Her eyes widened.
His eyes so full of something she didn't recognize.
Concern? Pity? Compassion?
She couldn't tell.
"Nothing is worth destroying yourself over,"
he said, more quietly now.
The air around her felt thick , too hot, too close.
He must've sensed her discomfort because his hand rose hesitantly toward her face. He frowned, unsure, before his fingertips even touched her.
Her heart almost leapt out of her chest. His eyes came closer , and when a tear rolled from her watery gaze, she was terrified he might pull away.
His touch was barely there, just a ghost of warmth. The worry written across his face was now painfully clear.
"You have a fever,"
he murmured.
Remembering that he hadn't flinched from her tears the other day , it hit her suddenly how absurd her panic was. This whole moment was suffocating. She wanted it to end , but part of her didn't.
"My fever's from the salve,"
she mumbled.
He leaned forward suddenly, closer to her chest.
"What are you-!"
She tried to move and froze instantly. Pain almost broke her again.
"Ah-"
She could feel his breath against her skin, warm, too close.
"Don't move,"
he said firmly.
Was he… mad at me?
"I'm checking for meza,"
he said calmly.
Meza? The word barely made sense.
it sounded like mint in this language. Did he mean menthol?
"If it has numbing or burning properties, that might explain the redness… but I can't smell it properly"
he murmured, almost to himself.
He was so close - and so gentle - it felt like torture.
"I'll ask Cassira,"
he said finally.
Panic fluttered in her chest.
No , I didn't want him to go. I didn't want anyone else here, especially not Cassira, not anyone to overhear this. And worse she hated that thought.
Do not want him to talk to Cassira? It was like I was afraid of losing him, as if like he belonged to me.
It was wrong.
It was disgusting.
I was disgusting for feeling this way.
He was only being kind because he was kind because he wanted to uncover the truth. That was all. Nothing more.
Still, when their eyes met again, she almost forgot how to breathe.
"Keep those beautiful eyes safe,"
he muttered.
"...Hm?"
His voice came out muffled beneath the gauze that covered half his face.
How was I supposed to hear anything through all this? And now, he was leaving.
God.
She was mortified. The thought of facing Cassira after all this, shame burned in her chest like fire. She should be ashamed. Cassira had taken care of her, tended to her wounds, and here she was, thinking things she had no right to think.
I'll make it up to her when I'm better,
I promised again but this time silently.
I'll talk to Darkov, too.
Then the door burst open again.
"Dude! I drew a picture of us!"
I'd thought Cassira was coming , but no. Of course not.
Oh, no. That dramatic face again?
Ravion's grinning face appeared, holding up what could only be described as stick figures.
"Look, two manly warriors. Just like us!"
"yeah Just like us…"
she echoed weakly.
But her mind wasn't on the drawing.
it was still caught between those two , tangled in the same chaotic, unspoken pull that refused to let her rest.
---