The pattering of the shower against the tiled floor filled the room. Maya stood in front of the mirror, a toothbrush dangling loosely from her lip. While her reflection stared back at her.
Her eyes were puffy, hair tangled. And faint traces of last night's makeup, smudged beneath them. She almost didn't recognize her own face.
There wasn't room for a proper check anyway, before rushing out like her life depended on it. Because, it indeed does. As if kicked back to life, she swiftly shook her head. Forcing the thoughts away as she cleared her mind.
Soon, the warm steam filled the room. The glass door fogged, softening her features. For a second, she wished this could wash away the thoughts. Resetting everything all together.
At that moment, Jina's voice echoed through the four corners of her room.
"Maya! You're going to be late!" She said, her voicing coming from the entrance. Gentle but with some urge of impatience.
Jina stood in the half opened doorway, her phone pressed against her ear. And her free hand clutching a piece of toast. "Manager Han is already downstairs, waiting!"
"I'll be out soon, Jina!" Maya's muffled response came from the closed washroom door.
"You said that about ten minutes ago!" Jina frowned.
But this time, there was no answer. Just the faint sound of a running water. With a resigned sigh, Jina grabbed her laptop which was siting on Maya's study table.
"Fine! But if you're late again, don't blame me!" she called before she drifted out. Leaving the door slightly ajar.
As Jina's footsteps faded down the hall, Maya shut off the tap. Leaning heavily against the bathroom's wall. Her reflection stared back at her once again. A word of encouragement escaping her lips like a motivational speaker.
"This was just a mistake to be forgotten." She whispered.
As usual, there was no more time to waste. Reality was calling outside, and she needed to go. With a nod, giving herself the boost, she head out. Rushing to her dresser, then to her dressing table.
Settling down, Maya straightened. Dabbing on a little foundation and lip tint. The motions were spontaneous, practiced. The routine of a girl who couldn't afford to fall apart. By the time she rose to her feet, her glow was back. Maya Kim, a rising actress, model, university student, and Seoul's latest obsession.
Just then, her phone buzzed. She tilted her gaze to the direction where it rested, picking it up.
Manager Han: "I'm still here. We are going to be late for the lectures." The text read. Without wasting another second, Maya slipped on her cap and sunglasses. Gabbed her bag, and hurried out.
---
The ride was quiet at first as they set off. Manager Han sat in the front, scrolling through his tablet while the radio played faintly in the background.
"You look tired," he said without looking up. "Was it another late -night shoot yesterday?"
Maya hesitated. "Something like that." She tried to brush it off.
Absently, he nodded, already moving to the next item on his list. "You have two classes today, then a meeting with the cosmetics brand at four. And a script read-through tomorrow morning. Don't forget to rest in-between. That is to say, You have a packed schedule this week."
Maya murmured a soft, "Mm" as she turned her gaze to the window.
Seoul passed in a blur of the early morning light and it's high glass towers. People were rushing to work, while cafés were filled with chatter. It was just a normal life, pulsing and ordinary. In the mist of it all, she wondered. If any of them would believe that, the "Maya Kim" plastered across billboards; was sitting here now, feeling empty and unsettled.
Impulsively, her fingers tightened around the strap of her bag. The earrings she had found missing that morning flashed in her memory's eye again.
An inaudible sigh escaped her lips. "How is she going to make her mother understand?" All these thoughts sent shivers down her spin.
The ride stretched on a bit, and by the time they reached campus, Maya had already tucked her worries deep behind her practiced smile.
"Text me when you're done," Manager Han said as she stepped out. "I'll be waiting at the lot."
Maya nodded, waving as she blended flawlessly into the flow of students crossing the courtyard. Her fame didn't go unnoticed though. Whispers followed her like perfume.
"Isn't that Maya Kim?" A female voice muttered as she passed by.
"She's even prettier in real life." Another added.
"I heard she's doing a drama with Jihoon oppa!"
Maya smiled faintly while she kept walking. She had grown used to the stares, the whispers, and the subtle envy. They were part of the job. Part of the mask she often wore.
.
.
.
The lecture hall was fully packed with students while others were still settling in as she walked in. Maya slipped into her seat at the back. Opening her notebook, as she geared herself up. Soon, lectures kicked started.
The professor's voice droned on, but her focus drifted in and out like static. She thought she got things figured out. But every now and then, she caught herself staring blankly at the board. Trying her best to recall the man's face. But all she could see were fragments of undeniable memories. His watch glinting in the dark, the shape of his jaw, and the way her pulse had quickened under his gaze.
She felt the tightness in her chest. Stop it, she silently scolded herself. It's over. You'll never see him again. Just forget it.
The entire lectures stretched for about an hour. Everyone was soon rushing out. Some moving to the next lecture hall, while others went their various ways.
Maya was heading to the packing lot when her friend Yuna, caught up with her halfway through the hallway.
"Coming to the café with us?" she cheerfully asked. "You look like you could use caffeine."
Maya forced a laugh. "Tempting, but I have got a shoot this afternoon."
"Again? Do you even sleep?" Yuna questioned.
"Rarely," she admitted, slinging the bag over her shoulder. "But that is what makeup is for. Right?"
Yuna shook her head, partially in awe, and in pity. "You're insane." She joked. "Don't forget you're still human though."
Maya smiled, waving as she walked off towards her manager who was already in the driveway. As usual, the rest of her day continued. Nothing out of the ordinary.
Just like that, Maya had began to forget everything. The night and it's aftermath of guilt. Fortunately, she was able to cooz her mother into buying her lie of mistakingly misplacing her earring during a shoot.
...
Maya's day started like any other day but thus time, she had a tight schedule. So she woke up earlier than usual. Maya rinsed her mouth and splashed her face with cold water. New day. New start, she told herself. An everyday motivation to herself. Just what she needed to get through the day.
Heading into her closet, she slipped into a hoodie and leggings. With a final check in the mirror, she strolled out the door, and trod to their open kitchen. Tying her hair into a loose bun before grabbing her coffee from the counter. The bitterness burned her throat, grounding her just enough to move forward.
Jina's voice cut through the apartment. "You're up early. Miracle, I will say."
A faint smiled spread her face. "Couldn't sleep."
"That's new," Jina teased, sliding a plate of toast across the table. "Rough night?"
Maya froze for half a second, then shrugged it off. "Work stress. You know how it is."
Jina didn't press further. She had learned that when Maya said work stress, it could mean anything from botched auditions to emotional exhaustion.
Instinctively, Maya checked the time on her phone; 8:37 AM. Her first class starts in the next twenty minutes. She grabbed her backpack, slinging it over her shoulder.
"Tell the universe to give me a day longer than twenty-four hours," she said, jokingly praying.
Jina smirked. "You already live three lives, Kim. Don't tempt it."
Maya smiled, "See you later." She called, already out the door.
.
.
.
The days slowly turned into weeks. And Maya's routine remained consuming. Morning classes, back-to-back castings, and late-night rehearsals. The busier she stayed, the easier it was to bury the questions she didn't want to face.
Her manager, Han, always pushed her harder. "Smile brighter, Maya. The campaign needs energy."
"Your social engagement is soaring through the roof. You need to post more behind-the-scenes stuff."
"You're the new 'it girl.' Keep it up."
The next few days melted into one another. Bright lights, cameras, and quick changes. All of it, coupled with compliments laced with criticism. Her popularity was rising fast, which came with endless scrutiny. Every smile had to be perfect, every photo approved. And every gesture marked for charm.
But beneath the shimmer, cracks began to show. Maya had been waking up with splitting headaches. Food had lost its usual appeal. And there were moments during shoots when she would feel dizzy, and her stomach twirling unexpectedly.
"You okay, Maya?" her makeup artist asked, one afternoon when she had gone quiet mid-prep.
"Just tired," she said quickly. "Didn't sleep well." She brushed it off like always. But the feeling lingered.
Just like that, the weeks kept going by.
One evening, Maya sat slumped on her bed, scrolling through her phone with unfocused eyes. The dorm was quiet. Jina had gone home for the weekend. And for once, there were no early calls or shoots scheduled.
She should have been relieved. Instead, she felt off. The nausea had been constant all morning.
Intuitively, her gaze drifted toward the small calendar pinned above her desk. Thinking it might be her period. But then, she froze at what caught her sight.
Her last period… had been over six weeks ago.
She blinked, doing the math again. That couldn't be right. She had been stressed, sure. Her sleep had been erratic. But six weeks?
"No," she whispered, shaking her head as if that could undo it.
Her heart raced as flashes of that night flickered again. The champagne, the music, the faceless man. The one she never even got the name of.
The room suddenly felt smaller, the silence too loud. In that moment, her phone slipped from her hand and hit the floor.
On an impulse, she pressed a trembling palm to her stomach.